17391633Enter the Pedant, the Curat, and Dull. 17411635Curat. I pray
se God for you
sir, your rea
sons at Dinner
17421636haue been
sharpe &
sententious: plea
sant without
scurillitie,
17431637wittie without a
ffe
ction, audatious without impudencie,
17441638learned without opinion, and
strange without here
sie: I did
17451639conuer
se this
quondam day with a companion of the kings,
17461640who is intituled, nominated, or called,
Don Adriano de Ar- 17481642Ped. Noui hominum tanquam te, His humour is loftie, his
17491643di
scour
se peremptorie: his tongue fyled, his eye ambitious,
17501644his gate maie
sticall, and his generall behauiour vaine, redicu
- 17511645lous, & thra
sonicall. He is too picked, to
spruce, too a
ffe
cted,
17521646to od as it were, too peregrinat as I may call it.
17541647Curat. A mo
st singuler and choyce Epithat,
17561649Peda. He draweth out the thred of his verbo
sitie,
finer
17571650then the
staple of his argument. I abhorre
such phanatticall
17581651phanta
sims,
such in
sociable and poynt deui
se companions,
17591652such rackers of ortagriphie, as to
speake dout
fine, when he
17601653should
say doubt; det, when he
shold pronounce debt; d e b t,
17611654not det: he clepeth a Calfe, Caufe: halfe, haufe: neighbour
17621655vocatur nebour; neigh abreuiated ne: this is abhominable,
17631656which he would call abbominable, it in
sinuateth me of in
- 17641657famie:
ne inteligis domine, to make frantique lunatique?
17661658Curat. Laus deo, bene intelligo.
17671659Peda. Bome boon for
boon pre
scian, a litle
scratcht, twil
serue.
17741665Brag. Men of peace well incontred.
17751666Ped. Mo
st millitarie
sir
salutation.
17761667Boy. They haue been at a great fea
st of Languages, and
17781669Clow. O they haue lyud long on the alm
sba
sket of wordes.
17791670I maruaile thy M. hath not eaten thee for a worde, for thou
17801671art not
so long by the head as
honorificabilitudinitatibus:
17811672Thou art ea
sier
swallowed then a
flapdragon.
17841674Brag. Mounsier, are you not lettred?
17851675Page. Yes yes, he teaches boyes the Horne-booke: What
17861676is Ab
speld backward with the horne on his head?
17871677Poda. Ba,
puericia with a horne added.
17881678Pag. Ba mo
st seely Sheepe, with a horne: you heare his (learning.
17911680Pag. The la
st of the
fiue Vowels if You repeate them,
17931682Peda. I will repeate them: a e I.
17941683Pag. The Sheepe, the other two concludes it o u.
17951684Brag. Now by the
sault wane of the
meditaranium, a
17961685sweete tutch, a quicke venewe of wit,
snip
snap, quicke and
17971686home, it reioyceth my intelle
ct, true wit.
17981687Page. O
fferd by a childe to an old man: which is wit-old.
18001688Peda. What is the
figure? What is the
figure?
18021690Peda. Thou di
sputes like an Infant: goe whip thy Gigg.
18041691Pag. Lende me your Horne to make one, and I will whip
18051692about your Infamie
vnū cita a gigge of a Cuckolds horne.
18071693Clow. And I had but one peny in the world thou
should
st 18081694haue it to buy Ginger bread: Holde, there is the verie
18091695Remuneration I had of thy Mai
ster, thou halfepennie
18101696pur
se of wit, thou Pidgin-egge of di
scretion. O and the
18111697heauens were
so plea
sed, that thou wart but my Ba
- 1698stard; What a ioyfull father woulde
st thou make me?
18121699Go to, thou ha
st it
ad dungil at the
fingers ends, as they
say.
18141700Peda. Oh I
smell fal
se Latine,
dunghel for
vnguem.
18151701Brag. Arts-man preambulat, we will be
singuled from the
18161702barbarous. Do you not educate youth at the Charg-Hou
se
18191705Brag. At your
sweete plea
sure, for the Mountaine.
18211707Bra. Sir, it is the Kings mo
st sweete plea
sur & a
ffe
ction,
18221708to congratulate the Prince
sse at her Pauilion, in the
posteriors 18231709of this day, which the rude multitude call the after-noone.
18251710Peda. The
posterior of the day, mo
st generous
sir, is liable,
18261711congruent, and mea
surable for the after noone: the worde is
18271712well culd, cho
se,
sweete, & apt I do a
ssure you
sir, I do a
ssure.
18291713Brag. Sir, the King is a noble Gentleman, and my fami
- 18301714lier, I do a
ssure ye very good friende: for what is inwarde
18311715betweene vs, let it pa
sse. I do be
seech thee remember thy
18321716curte
sie. I be
seech thee apparrell thy head: and among other
18331717importunt and mo
st serious de
signes, and of great import in
18341718deede too: but let that pa
sse for I mu
st tell thee it will
18351719plea
se his Grace (by the worlde)
sometime to leane vpon
18361720my poore
shoulder, and with his royall
finger thus dallie
18371721with my excrement, with my mu
stachie: but
sweete hart
18381722let that pa
sse. By the world I recount no fable,
some certaine
18391723special honours it plea
seth his greatnes to impart to
Armado 18401724a Souldier, a man of trauayle, that hath
seene the worlde: but
18411725let that pa
sse; the very all of all is: but
sweet hart, I do implore
18421726secretie, that the King would haue me pre
sent the Prince
sse
18441727(
sweete chuck) with
some delightfull o
stentation, or
show,
18451728or pageant, or antique, or
fierworke: Now vnder
standing
18461729that the Curate and your
sweete
selfe, are good at
such erup
- 18471730tions, and
sodaine breaking out of myrth (as it were) I haue
18481731acquainted you withall, to the ende to craue your a
ssistance.
18501732Peda. Sir, you
shall pre
sent before her the Nine Worthies,
18511733Sir
Holofernes, as concerning
some entertainement of time,
18521734some
show in the po
sterior of this day, to be rended by our
18531735a
ssistants the Kinges commaund, and this mo
st gallant il
- 18541736lu
strate and learned Gentleman, before the Prince
sse: I
say
18551737none
so
fit as to pre
sent the nine Worthies.
18571738Curat. Where will you
finde men worthie enough to pre
- 18591740Peda. Iosua, your
selfe, my
selfe, and this gallant Gentle
- 18601741man
Iudas Machabeus; this Swaine (becau
se of his great lim
18611742or ioynt)
shall pa
sse
Pompey the great, the Page
Hercules.
18631743Brag. Pardon
sir, error: He is not quantitie enough for
18641744that worthies thumbe, he is not
so big as the end of his Club.
18661745Peda. Shall I haue audience? He
shall pre
sent
Hercules 18671746in minoritie: his enter and exit
shalbe
strangling a Snake;
18681747and I will haue an Apologie for that purpo
se.
18691748Page. An excellent deuice:
so if any of the audience hi
sse,
18701749you may cry, Well done
Hercules, now thou crus
she
st the
18711750Snake; that is the way to make an o
ffence gracious, though
18731752Brag. For the re
st of the Worthies
? 18741753Peda. I will play three my
selfe.
18781757Brag. We will haue, if this fadge not, an Antique. I be
- 18801759Peda. Via good-man
Dull, thou ha
st spoken no worde all
18821761Dull. Nor vnder
stoode none neither
sir.
18831762Ped. Alone, we will employ thee.
18841763Dull. Ile make one in a daunce, or
so: or I will play on
18851764the Taber to the worthies, and let them dance the hey.
18861765Peda. Mo
st Dull, hone
st Dull, to our
sport: away.
Exeunt.