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  • Title: As You Like It (Folio 1, 1623)
  • Editor: David Bevington
  • ISBN: 978-1-55058-369-4

    Copyright David Bevington. This text may be freely used for educational, non-profit purposes; for all other uses contact the Editor.
    Author: William Shakespeare
    Editor: David Bevington
    Peer Reviewed

    As You Like It (Folio 1, 1623)

    Scena Secunda.
    1200Enter Orlando.
    Orl. Hang there my verse, in witnesse of my loue,
    And thou thrice crowned Queene of night suruey
    With thy chaste eye, from thy pale spheare aboue
    Thy Huntresse name, that my full life doth sway.
    1205O Rosalind, these Trees shall be my Bookes,
    And in their barkes my thoughts Ile charracter,
    That euerie eye, which in this Forrest lookes,
    Shall see thy vertue witnest euery where.
    Run, run Orlando, carue on euery Tree,
    1210The faire, the chaste, and vnexpressiue shee. Exit
    Enter Corin & Clowne.
    Co. And how like you this shepherds life Mr Touchstone?
    Clow. Truely Shepheard, in respect of it selfe, it is a
    good life; but in respect that it is a shepheards life, it is
    1215naught. In respect that it is solitary, I like it verie well:
    but in respect that it is priuate, it is a very vild life. Now
    in respect it is in the fields, it pleaseth mee well: but in
    respect it is not in the Court, it is tedious. As it is a spare
    life (looke you) it fits my humor well: but as there is no
    1220more plentie in it, it goes much against my stomacke.
    Has't any Philosophie in thee shepheard?
    Cor. No more, but that I know the more one sickens,
    the worse at ease he is: and that hee that wants money,
    meanes, and content, is without three good frends. That
    1225the propertie of raine is to wet, and fire to burne: That
    pood pasture makes fat sheepe: and that a great cause of
    the night, is lacke of the Sunne: That hee that hath lear-
    ned no wit by Nature, nor Art, may complaine of good
    breeding, or comes of a very dull kindred.
    1230Clo. Such a one is a naturall Philosopher:
    Was't euer in Court, Shepheard?
    Cor. No truly.
    Clo. Then thou art damn'd.
    Cor. Nay, I hope.
    1235Clo. Truly thou art damn'd, like an ill roasted Egge,
    all on one side.
    Cor. For not being at Court? your reason.
    Clo. Why, if thou neuer was't at Court, thou neuer
    saw'st good manners: if thou neuer saw'st good maners,
    1240then thy manners must be wicked, and wickednes is sin,
    and sinne is damnation: Thou art in a parlous state shep-
    Cor. Not a whit Touchstone, those that are good ma-
    ners at the Court, are as ridiculous in the Countrey, as
    1245the behauiour of the Countrie is most mockeable at the
    Court. You told me, you salute not at the Court, but
    you kisse your hands; that courtesie would be vncleanlie
    if Courtiers were shepheards.
    Clo. Instance, briefly: come, instance.
    1250Cor. Why we are still handling our Ewes, and their
    Fels you know are greasie.
    Clo. Why do not your Courtiers hands sweate? and
    is not the grease of a Mutton, as wholesome as the sweat
    of a man? Shallow, shallow: A better instance I say:
    Cor. Besides, our hands are hard.
    Clo. Your lips wil feele them the sooner. Shallow a-
    gen: a more sounder instance, come.
    Cor. And they are often tarr'd ouer, with the surgery
    1260of our sheepe: and would you haue vs kisse Tarre? The
    Courtiers hands are perfum'd with Ciuet.
    Clo. Most shallow man: Thou wormes meate in re-
    spect of a good peece of flesh indeed: learne of the wise
    and perpend: Ciuet is of a baser birth then Tarre, the
    1265verie vncleanly fluxe of a Cat. Mend the instance Shep-
    Cor. You haue too Courtly a wit, for me, Ile rest.
    Clo. Wilt thou rest damn'd? God helpe thee shallow
    man: God make incision in thee, thou art raw.
    1270Cor. Sir, I am a true Labourer, I earne that I eate: get
    that I weare; owe no man hate, enuie no mans happi-
    nesse: glad of other mens good content with my harme:
    and the greatest of my pride, is to see my Ewes graze, &
    my Lambes sucke.
    1275Clo. That is another simple sinne in you, to bring the
    Ewes and the Rammes together, and to offer to get your
    liuing, by the copulation of Cattle, to be bawd to a Bel-
    weather, and to betray a shee-Lambe of a tweluemonth
    to a crooked-pated olde Cuckoldly Ramme, out of all
    1280reasonable match. If thou bee'st not damn'd for this, the
    diuell himselfe will haue no shepherds, I cannot see else
    how thou shouldst scape.
    Cor. Heere comes yong Mr Ganimed, my new Mistris-
    ses Brother.
    1285Enter Rosalind.
    Ros.From the east to westerne Inde,
    no iewel is like Rosalinde,
    Hir worth being mounted on the winde,
    through all the world beares Rosalinde.
    1290All the pictures fairest Linde,
    are but blacke to Rosalinde:
    Let no face bee kept in mind,
    but the faire of Rosalinde.
    Clo. Ile rime you so, eight yeares together; dinners,
    1295and suppers, and sleeping hours excepted: it is the right
    Butter-womens ranke to Market.
    Ros. Out Foole.
    Clo. For a taste.
    If a Hart doe lacke a Hinde,
    1300 Let him seeke out Rosalinde:
    If the Cat will after kinde,
    so be sure will Rosalinde:
    Wintred garments must be linde,
    so must slender Rosalinde:
    1305They that reap must sheafe and binde,
    then to cart with Rosalinde.
    Sweetest nut, hath sowrest rinde,
    such a nut is Rosalinde.
    He that sweetest rose will finde,
    1310 must finde Loues pricke, & Rosalinde.
    This is the verie false gallop of Verses, why doe you in-
    fect your selfe with them?
    Ros. Peace you dull foole, I found them on a tree.
    Clo. Truely the tree yeelds bad fruite.
    1315Ros. Ile graffe it with you, and then I shall graffe it
    with a Medler: then it will be the earliest fruit i'th coun-
    try: for you'l be rotten ere you bee halfe ripe, and that's
    the right vertue of the Medler.
    Clo. You haue said: but whether wisely or no, let the
    1320Forrest iudge.
    Enter Celia with a writing.
    Ros. Peace, here comes my sister reading, stand aside.
    Cel. Why should this Desert bee,
    for it is vnpeopled? Noe:
    1325Tonges Ile hang on euerie tree,
    that shall ciuill sayings shoe.
    Some, how briefe the Life of man
    runs his erring pilgrimage,
    That the stretching of a span,
    1330 buckles in his summe of age.
    Some of violated vowes,
    twixt the soules of friend, and friend:
    But vpon the fairest bowes,
    or at euerie sentence end;
    1335Will I Rosalinda write,
    teaching all that reade, to know
    The quintessence of euerie sprite,
    heauen would in little show.
    Therefore heauen Nature charg'd,
    1340 that one bodie shonld be fill'd
    With all Graces wide enlarg'd,
    nature presently distill'd
    Helens cheeke, but not his heart,
    Cleopatra's Maiestie:
    1345Attalanta's better part,
    sad Lucrecia's Modestie.
    Thus Rosalinde of manie parts,
    by Heauenly Synode was deuis'd,
    Of manie faces, eyes, and hearts,
    1350 to haue the touches deerest pris'd.
    Heauen would that shee these gifts should haue,
    and I to liue and die her slaue.
    Ros. O most gentle Iupiter, what tedious homilie of
    Loue haue you wearied your parishioners withall, and
    1355neuer cri'de, haue patience good people.
    Cel. How now backe friends: Shepheard, go off a lit-
    tle: go with him sirrah.
    Clo. Come Shepheard, let vs make an honorable re-
    treit, though not with bagge and baggage, yet with
    1360scrip and scrippage. Exit.
    Cel. Didst thou heare these verses?
    Ros. O yes, I heard them all, and more too, for some
    of them had in them more feete then the Verses would
    1365Cel. That's no matter: the feet might beare y^e verses.
    Ros. I, but the feet were lame, and could not beare
    themselues without the verse, and therefore stood lame-
    ly in the verse.
    Cel. But didst thou heare without wondering, how
    1370thy name should be hang'd and carued vpon these trees?
    Ros. I was seuen of the nine daies out of the wonder,
    before you came: for looke heere what I found on a
    Palme tree; I was neuer so berimdsince Pythagoras time
    that I was an Irish Rat, which I can hardly remember.
    1375Cel. Tro you, who hath done this?
    Ros. Is it a man?
    Cel. And a chaine that you once wore about his neck:
    change you colour?
    Ros. I pre'thee who?
    1380Cel. O Lord, Lord, it is a hard matter for friends to
    meete; but Mountaines may bee remoou'd with Earth-
    quakes, and so encounter.
    Ros. Nay, but who is it?
    Cel. Is it possible?
    1385Ros. Nay, I pre'thee
    now, with most petitionary ve-
    hemence, tell me who it is.
    Cel. O wonderfull, wonderfull, and most wonderfull
    wonderfull, and yet againe wonderful, and after that out
    of all hooping.
    1390Ros. Good my complection, dost thou think though
    I am caparison'd like a man, I haue a doublet and hose in
    my disposition? One inch of delay more, is a South-sea
    of discouerie. I pre'thee tell me, who is it quickely, and
    speake apace: I would thou couldst stammer, that thou
    1395might'st powre this conceal'd man out of thy mouth, as
    Wine comes out of a narrow-mouth'd bottle: either too
    much at once, or none at all. I pre'thee take the Corke
    out of thy mouth, that I may drinke thy tydings.
    Cel. So you may put a man in your belly.
    1400Ros. Is he of Gods making? What manner of man?
    Is his head worth a hat? Or his chin worth a beard?
    Cel. Nay, he hath but a little beard.
    Ros. Why God will send more, if the man will bee
    thankful: let me stay the growth of his beard, if thou
    1405delay me not the knowledge of his chin.
    Cel. It is yong Orlando, that tript vp the Wrastlers
    heeles, and your heart, both in an instant.
    Ros. Nay, but the diuell take mocking: speake sadde
    brow, and true maid.
    1410Cel. I'faith (Coz) tis he.
    Ros. Orlando?
    Cel. Orlando.
    Ros. Alas the day, what shall I do with my doublet &
    hose? What did he when thou saw'st him? What sayde
    1415he? How look'd he? Wherein went he? What makes hee
    heere? Did he aske for me? Where remaines he ? How
    parted he with thee ? And when shalt thou see him a-
    gaine? Answer me in one vvord.
    Cel. You must borrow me Gargantuas mouth first:
    1420'tis a Word too great for any mouth of this Ages size, to
    say I and no, to these particulars, is more then to answer
    in a Catechisme.
    Ros. But doth he know that I am in this Forrest, and
    in mans apparrell? Looks he as freshly, as he did the day
    1425he Wrastled?
    Cel. It is as easie to count Atomies as to resolue the
    propositions of a Louer: but take a taste of my finding
    him, and rellish it with good obseruance. I found him
    vnder a tree like a drop'd Acorne.
    1430Ros. It may vvel be cal'd Ioues tree, when it droppes
    forth fruite.
    Cel. Giue me audience, good Madam.
    Ros. Proceed.
    Cel. There lay hee stretch'd along like a Wounded
    Ros. Though it be pittie to see such a sight, it vvell
    becomes the ground.
    Cel. Cry holla, to the tongue, I prethee: it curuettes
    vnseasonably. He was furnish'd like a Hunter.
    1440Ros. O ominous, he comes to kill my Hart.
    Cel. I would sing my song without a burthen, thou
    bring'st me out of tune.
    Ros. Do you not know I am a woman, when I thinke,
    I must speake: sweet, say on.
    1445Enter Orlando & Iaques.
    Cel. You bring me out. Soft, comes he not heere?
    Ros. 'Tis he, slinke by, and note him.
    Iaq I thanke you for your company, but good faith
    I had as liefe haue beene my selfe alone.
    1450Orl. And so had I: but yet for fashion sake
    I thanke you too, for your societie.
    Iaq. God buy you, let's meet as little as we can.
    Orl. I do desire we may be better strangers.
    Iaq. I pray you marre no more trees vvith Writing
    1455Loue-songs in their barkes.
    Orl. I pray you marre no moe of my verses with rea-
    ding them ill-fauouredly.
    Iaq. Rosalinde is your loues name? Orl. Yes, Iust.
    Iaq. I do not like her name.
    1460Orl. There was no thought of pleasing you when she
    was christen'd.
    Iaq. What stature is she of?
    Orl. Iust as high as my heart.
    Iaq. You are ful of prety answers: haue you not bin ac-
    1465quainted with goldsmiths wiues, & cond thē out of rings
    Orl. Not so: but I answer you right painted cloath,
    from whence you haue studied your questions.
    Iaq. You haue a nimble wit; I thinke 'twas made of
    Attalanta's heeles. Will you sitte downe with me, and
    1470wee two, will raile against our Mistris the world, and all
    our miserie.
    Orl. I wil chide no breather in the world but my selfe
    against whom I know mosl faults.
    Iaq. The worst fault you haue, is to be in loue.
    1475Orl. 'Tis a fault I will not change, for your best ver-
    tue: I am wearie of you.
    Iaq. By my troth, I was seeking for a Foole, when I
    found you.
    Orl. He is drown'd in the brooke, looke but in, and
    1480you shall see him.
    Iaq. There I shal see mine owne figure.
    Orl. Which I take to be either a foole, or a Cipher.
    Iaq. Ile tarrie no longer with you, farewell good sig-
    nior Loue.
    1485Orl. I am glad of your departure: Adieu good Mon-
    sieur Melancholly.
    Ros. I wil speake to him like a sawcie Lacky. and vn-
    der that habit play the knaue with him, do you hear For-(rester.
    Orl. Verie wel, what would you?
    1490Ros. I pray you, what i'st a clocke?
    Orl. You should aske me what time o'day: there's no
    clocke in the Forrest.
    Ros. Then there is no true Louer in the Forrest, else
    sighing euerie minute, and groaning euerie houre wold
    1495detect the lazie foot of time, as wel as a clocke.
    Orl. And why not the swift foote of time? Had not
    that bin as proper?
    Ros. By no meanes sir; Time trauels in diuers paces,
    with diuers persons: Ile tel you who Time ambles with-
    1500all, who Time trots withal, who Time gallops withal,
    and who he stands stil withall.
    Orl. I prethee, who doth he trot withal?
    Ros. Marry he trots hard with a yong maid, between
    the contract of her marriage, and the day it is solemnizd:
    1505if the interim be but a sennight, Times pace is so hard,
    that it seemes the length of seuen yeare.
    Orl. Who ambles Time withal?
    Ros. With a Priest that lacks Latine, and a rich man
    that hath not the Gowt : for the one sleepes easily be-
    1510cause he cannot study, and the other liues merrily, be-
    cause he feeles no paine: the one lacking the burthen of
    leane and wasteful Learning; the other knowing no bur-
    then of heauie tedious penurie. These Time ambles
    1515Orl. Who doth he gallop withal?
    Ros. With a theefe to the gallowes : for though hee
    go as softly as foot can fall, he thinkes himselfe too soon
    Orl. Who staies it stil withal?
    1520Ros. With Lawiers in the vacation: for they sleepe
    betweene Terme and Terme, and then they perceiue not
    how time moues.
    Orl. Where dwel you prettie youth?
    Ros. With this Shepheardesse my sister : heere in the
    1525skirts of the Forrest, like fringe vpon a petticoat.
    Orl. Are you natiue of this place?
    Ros. As the Conie that you see dwell where shee is
    Orl. Your accent is something finer, then you could
    1530purchase in so remoued a dwelling.
    Ros. I haue bin told so of many: but indeed, an olde
    religious Vnckle of mine taught me to speake, who was
    in his youth an inland man, one that knew Courtship too
    well: for there he fel in loue. I haue heard him read ma-
    1535ny Lectors against it, and I thanke God, I am not a Wo-
    man to be touch'd with so many giddie offences as hee
    hath generally tax'd their whole sex withal.
    Orl. Can you remember any of the principall euils,
    that he laid to the charge of women?
    1540Ros. There were none principal, they were all like
    one another, as halfe pence are, euerie one fault seeming
    monstrous, til his fellow-fault came to match it.
    Orl. I prethee recount some of them.
    Ros. No: I wil not cast away my physick, but on those
    1545that are sicke. There is a man haunts the Forrest, that a-
    buses our yong plants with caruing Rosalinde on their
    barkes; hangs Oades vpon Hauthornes, and Elegies on
    brambles; all (forsooth) defying the name of Rosalinde.
    If I could meet that Fancie-monger, I would giue him
    1550some good counsel, for he seemes to haue the Quotidian
    of Loue vpon him.
    Orl. I am he that is so Loue-shak'd, I pray you tel
    me your remedie.
    Ros. There is none of my Vnckles markes vpon you:
    1555he taught me how to know a man in loue: in which cage
    of rushes, I am sure you art not prisoner.
    Orl. What were his markes?
    Ros. A leane cheeke, which you haue not: a blew eie
    and sunken, which you haue not: an vnquestionable spi-
    1560rit, which you haue not: a beard neglected, which you
    haue not: (but I pardon you for that, for simply your ha-
    uing in beard, is a yonger brothers reuennew) then your
    hose should be vngarter'd, your bonnet vnbanded, your
    sleeue vnbutton'd, your shoo vnti'de, and euerie thing
    1565about you, demonstrating a carelesse desolation: but you
    are no such man; you are rather point deuice in your ac-
    coustrements, as louing your selfe, then seeming the Lo-
    uer of any other.
    Orl. Faire youth, I would I could make thee beleeue (I Loue.
    1570Ros. Me beleeue it? You may assoone make her that
    you Loue beleeue it, which I warrant she is apter to do,
    then to confesse she do's: that is one of the points, in the
    which women stil giue the lie to their consciences. But
    in good sooth, are you he that hangs the verses on the
    1575Trees, wherein Rosalind is so admired?
    Orl. I sweare to thee youth, by the white hand of
    Rosalind, I am that he, that vnfortunate he.
    Ros. But are you so much in loue, as your rimes speak?
    Orl. Neither rime nor reason can expresse how much.
    1580Ros: Loue is meerely a madnesse, and I tel you, de-
    serues as wel a darke house, and a whip, as madmen do:
    and the reason why they are not so punish'd and cured, is
    that the Lunacie is so ordinarie, that the whippers are in
    loue too: yet I professe curing it by counsel.
    1585Orl. Did you euer cure any so?
    Ros. Yes one, and in this manner. Hee was to ima-
    gine me his Loue, his Mistris: and I set him euerie day
    to woe me. At which time would I, being but a moonish
    youth, greeue, be effeminate, changeable, longing, and
    1590liking, proud, fantastical, apish, shallow, inconstant, ful
    of teares, full of smiles; for euerie passion something, and
    for no passion truly any thing, as boyes and women are
    for the most part, cattle of this colour: would now like
    him, now loath him: then entertaine him, then forswear
    1595him: now weepe for him, then spit at him; that I draue
    my Sutor from his mad humor of loue, to a liuing humor
    of madnes, w^c was to forsweare the ful stream of y^e world,
    and to liue in a nooke meerly Monastick: and thus I cur'd
    him, and this way wil I take vpon mee to wash your Li-
    1600uer as cleane as a sound sheepes heart, that there shal not
    be one spot of Loue in't.
    Orl. I would not be cured, youth.
    Ros. I would cure you, if you would but call me Rosa-
    lind, and come euerie day to my Coat, and woe me.
    1605Orlan. Now by the faith of my loue, I will ; Tel me
    where it is.
    Ros. Go with me to it, and Ile shew it you: and by
    the way, you shal tell me, where in the Forrest you liue:
    Wil you go?
    1610Orl. With all my heart, good youth.
    Ros. Nay, you must call mee Rosalind: Come sister,
    will you go? Exeunt.