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- Edition: Henry IV, Part 1
Henry IV, Part 1 (Folio 1 1623)
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964 Scena Quarta.
965 Enter Prince and Poines.
966Prin. Ned, prethee come out of that fat roome, & lend
967me thy hand to laugh a little.
972Drawers, and can call them by their names, as Tom, Dicke,
973and Francis. They take it already vpon their confidence,
974that though I be but Prince of Wales, yet I am the King
977when I am King of England, I shall command al the good
979ing Scarlet; and when you breath in your watering, then
e3 they
56 The First Part of King Henry the Fourth.
980they cry hem, and bid you play it off. To conclude, I am
982drinke with any Tinker in his owne Language during my
985ten which name of Ned, I giue thee this peniworth of Su-
986gar, clapt euen now into my hand by an vnder Skinker,
992while I question my puny Drawer, to what end hee gaue
993me the Sugar, and do neuer leaue calling Francis, that his
996Poines. Francis.
998Poin. Francis.
999 Enter Drawer.
1001net, Ralfe.
1002Prince. Come hither Francis.
1003Fran. My Lord.
1006Poin. Francis.
1010to play the coward with thy Indenture, & shew it a faire
1011paire of heeles, and run from it?
1013England, I could finde in my heart.
1014Poin. Francis.
1016Prin. How old art thou, Francis?
1018Poin. Francis.
1020Prin. Nay but harke you Francis, for the Sugar thou
1021gauest me, 'twas a penyworth, was't not?
1024me when thou wilt, and thou shalt haue it.
1025Poin. Francis.
1026Fran. Anon, anon.
1028cis: or Francis, on thursday: or indeed Francis when thou
1029wilt. But Francis.
1030Fran. My Lord.
1032button, Not-pated, Agat ring, Puke stocking, Caddice
1033garter, Smooth tongue, Spanish pouch.
1036drinke: for looke you Francis, your white Canuas doub-
1039Poin. Francis.
1041 Heere they both call him, the Drawer stands amazed,
1042not knowing which way to go.
1043 Enter Vintner.
1045ling? Looke to the Guests within: My Lord, olde Sir
1046Iohn with halfe a dozen more, are at the doore: shall I let
1047them in?
1048Prin. Let them alone awhile, and then open the doore.
1049Poines.
1050 Enter Poines.
1053the doore, shall we be merry?
1054Poin. As merrie as Crickets my Lad. But harke yee,
1055What cunning match haue you made this iest of the
1056Drawer? Come, what's the issue?
1059the pupill age of this present twelue a clock at midnight.
1060What's a clocke Francis?
1065cell of a reckoning. I am not yet of Percies mind, the Hot-
1068to his wife; Fie vpon this quiet life, I want worke. O my
1074kard. Call in Ribs, call in Tallow.
1075 Enter Falstaffe.
1078too, marry and Amen. Giue me a cup of Sacke Boy. Ere
1080them too. A plague of all cowards. Giue me a Cup of
1081Sacke, Rogue. Is there no Vertue extant?
1083pittifull hearted Titan that melted at the sweete Tale of
1084the Sunne? If thou didst, then behold that compound.
1085Fal. You Rogue, heere's Lime in this Sacke too: there
1086is nothing but Roguery to be found in Villanous man; yet
1088lanous Coward, go thy wayes old Iacke, die when thou
1089wilt, if manhood, good manhood be not forgot vpon the
1090face of the earth, then am I a shotten Herring: there liues
1091not three good men vnhang'd in England, & one of them
1092is fat, and growes old, God helpe the while, a bad world I
1096Fal. A Kings Sonne? If I do not beate thee out of thy
1097Kingdome with a dagger of Lath, and driue all thy Sub-
1099weare haire on my face more. You Prince of Wales?
1102Poines there?
1103Prin. Ye fatch paunch, and yee call mee Coward, Ile
1104stab thee.
1106the Coward: but I would giue a thousand pound I could
that
The First Part of Henry the Fourth. 57
1110king: giue me them that will face me. Giue me a Cup
1111of Sack, I am a Rogue if I drunke to day.
1116Prince. What's the matter?
1117Falst. What's the matter? here be foure of vs, haue
1118ta'ne a thousand pound this Morning.
1119Prince. Where is it, Iack? where is it?
1120Falst. Where is it? taken from vs, it is: a hundred
1121vpon poore foure of vs.
1122Prince. What, a hundred, man?
1123Falst. I am a Rogue, if I were not at halfe Sword with
1124a dozen of them two houres together. I haue scaped by
1125miracle. I am eight times thrust through the Doublet,
1126foure through the Hose, my Buckler cut through and
1128I neuer dealt better since I was a man: all would not doe.
1131of darknesse.
1135Gad. And bound them.
1136Peto. No, no, they were not bound.
1137Falst. You Rogue, they were bound, euery man of
1138them, or I am a Iew else, an Ebrew Iew.
1140set vpon vs.
1142other.
1143Prince. What, fought yee with them all?
1144Falst. All? I know not what yee call all: but if I
1146if there were not two or three and fiftie vpon poore olde
1147Iack, then am I no two-legg'd Creature.
1149them.
1151two of them: Two I am sure I haue payed, two Rogues
1152in Buckrom Sutes. I tell thee what, Hal, if I tell thee a
1154word: here I lay, and thus I bore my point; foure Rogues
1155in Buckrom let driue at me.
1157Falst. Foure Hal, I told thee foure.
1160at me; I made no more adoe, but tooke all their seuen
1161points in my Targuet, thus.
1162Prince. Seuen? why there were but foure, euen now.
1163Falst. In Buckrom.
1164Poin. I, foure, in Buckrom Sutes.
1168Prin. I, and marke thee too, Iack.
1170nine in Buckrom, that I told thee of.
1171Prin. So, two more alreadie.
1172Falst. Their Points being broken.
1174Falst. Began to giue me ground: but I followed me
1176the eleuen I pay'd.
1178out of two?
1180gotten Knaues, in Kendall Greene, came at my Back, and
1182not see thy Hand.
1187Falst. What, art thou mad? art thou mad? is not the
1188truth, the truth?
1192to this?
1195Strappado, or all the Racks in the World, I would not
1197on? If Reasons were as plentie as Black-berries, I would
1200guine Coward, this Bed-presser, this Hors-back-breaker,
1201this huge Hill of Flesh.
1204to vtter. What is like thee? You Tailors yard, you sheath
1206Prin. Well, breath a-while, and then to't againe: and
1208me speake but thus.
1209Poin. Marke Iacke.
1211them, and were Masters of their Wealth: mark now how
1213on you foure, and with a word, outfac'd you from your
1216as quicke dexteritie, and roared for mercy, and still ranne
1217and roar'd, as euer I heard Bull-Calfe. What a Slaue art
1221and apparant shame?
1223thou now?
1224Fal. I knew ye as well as he that made ye. Why heare
1225ye my Masters, was it for me to kill the Heire apparant?
1226Should I turne vpon the true Prince? Why, thou knowest
1230my selfe, and thee, during my life: I, for a valiant Lion,
1231and thou for a true Prince. But Lads, I am glad you haue
1233pray to morrow. Gallants, Lads, Boyes, Harts of Gold,
1234all the good Titles of Fellowship come to you. What,
1237away.
1239 Enter Hostesse
1240Host. My Lord, the Prince?
Prin.
58 The First Part of King Henry the Fourth.
1242thou to me?
1243Hostesse. Marry, my Lord, there is a Noble man of the
1245comes from your Father.
1246Prin. Giue him as much as will make him a Royall
1247man, and send him backe againe to my Mother.
1248Falst. What manner of man is hee?
1249Hostesse. An old man.
1250Falst. What doth Grauitie out of his Bed at Midnight?
1251Shall I giue him his answere?
1252Prin. Prethee doe Iacke.
1255Peto, so did you Bardol: you are Lyons too, you ranne
1257no, fie.
1260Sword so hackt?
1262would sweare truth out of England, but hee would make
1264the like.
1266to make them bleed, and then to beslubber our garments
1267with it, and sweare it was the blood of true men. I did
1269his monstrous deuices.
1271teene yeeres agoe, and wert taken with the manner, and
1276behold these Exhalations?
1277Prin. I doe
1278Bard. What thinke you they portend?
1280Bard. Choler, my Lord, if rightly taken.
1281Prin. No, if rightly taken, Halter.
1282 Enter Falstaffe.
1283Heere comes leane Iacke, heere comes bare-bone. How
1286Falst. My owne Knee? When I was about thy yeeres
1287( Hal) I was not an Eagles Talent in the Waste, I could
1288haue crept into any Aldermans Thumbe-Ring: a plague
1289of sighing and griefe, it blowes a man vp like a Bladder.
1290There's villanous Newes abroad; heere was Sir Iohn
1291Braby from your Father; you must goe to the Court in
1292the Morning. The same mad fellow of the North, Percy;
1293and hee of Wales, that gaue Amamon the Bastinado,
1294and made Lucifer Cuckold, and swore the Deuill his true
1295Liege-man vpon the Crosse of a Welch-hooke; what a
1296plague call you him?
1297Poin. O, Glendower.
1299Mortimer, and old Northumberland, and the sprightly
1300Scot of Scots, Dowglas, that runnes a Horse-backe vp a
1301Hill perpendicular.
1303kills a Sparrow flying.
1304Falst. You haue hit it.
1305Prin. So did he neuer the Sparrow.
1307hee will not runne.
1309so for running?
1311not budge a foot.
1314and one Mordake, and a thousand blew-Cappes more.
1316turn'd white with the Newes; you may buy Land now
1317as cheape as stinking Mackrell.
1318Prin. Then 'tis like, if there come a hot Sunne, and this
1320they buy Hob-nayles, by the Hundreds.
1322shall haue good trading that way. But tell me Hal, art
1323not thou horrible afear'd? thou being Heire apparant,
1325gaine, as that Fiend Dowglas, that Spirit Percy, and that
1326Deuill Glendower? Art not thou horrible afraid? Doth
1327not thy blood thrill at it?
1329Falst. Well, thou wilt be horrible chidde to morrow,
1330when thou commest to thy Father: if thou doe loue me,
1333vpon the particulars of my Life.
1335State, this Dagger my Scepter, and this Cushion my
1336Crowne.
1338den Scepter for a Leaden Dagger, and thy precious rich
1339Crowne, for a pittifull bald Crowne.
1341thee, now shalt thou be moued. Giue me a Cup of Sacke
1342to make mine eyes looke redde, that it may be thought I
1344in King Cambyses vaine.
1345Prin. Well, heere is my Legge.
1349are vaine.
1351nance?
1355Players, as euer I see.
1356Falst. Peace good Pint-pot, peace good Tickle-braine.
1358time; but also, how thou art accompanied: For though
1359the Camomile, the more it is troden, the faster it growes;
1361Thou art my Sonne: I haue partly thy Mothers Word,
1362partly my Opinion; but chiefely, a villanous tricke of
1363thine Eye, and a foolish hanging of thy nether Lippe, that
1364doth warrant me. If then thou be Sonne to mee, heere
1365lyeth the point: why, being Sonne to me, art thou so
1366poynted at? Shall the blessed Sonne of Heauen proue a
1367Micher, and eate Black-berryes? a question not to bee
1368askt. Shall the Sonne of England proue a Theefe, and
1370Harry, which thou hast often heard of, and it is knowne to
many
The First Part of King Henry the Fourth. 59
1371many in our Land, by the Name of Pitch: this Pitch (as
1376there is a vertuous man, whom I haue often noted in thy
1377companie, but I know not his Name.
1379iestie?
1380Falst. A goodly portly man yfaith, and a corpulent,
1383inclining to threescore; and now I remember mee, his
1385hee deceiues mee; for Harry, I see Vertue in his Lookes.
1386If then the Tree may be knowne by the Fruit, as the Fruit
1387by the Tree, then peremptorily I speake it, there is Vertue
1389tell mee now, thou naughtie Varlet, tell mee, where hast
1390thou beene this moneth?
1392for mee, and Ile play my Father.
1394maiestically, both in word and matter, hang me vp by the
1395heeles for a Rabbet-sucker, or a Poulters Hare.
1398Prin. Now Harry, whence come you?
1400Prin. The complaints I heare of thee, are grieuous.
1402ye for a young Prince.
1404ne're looke on me: thou art violently carryed away from
1405Grace: there is a Deuill haunts thee, in the likenesse of a
1406fat old Man; a Tunne of Man is thy Companion: Why
1410bagge of Guts, that rosted Manning Tree Oxe with the
1411Pudding in his Belly, that reuerend Vice, that grey Ini-
1413in is he good, but to taste Sacke, and drinke it? wherein
1414neat and cleanly, but to carue a Capon, and eat it? where-
1415in Cunning, but in Craft? wherein Craftie, but in Villa-
1416nie? wherein Villanous, but in all things? wherein wor-
1417thy, but in nothing?
1418Falst. I would your Grace would take me with you:
1419whom meanes your Grace?
1420Prince. That villanous abhominable mis-leader of
1422Falst. My Lord, the man I know.
1426(the more the pittie) his white hayres doe witnesse it:
1428ster, that I vtterly deny. If Sacke and Sugar bee a fault,
1429Heauen helpe the Wicked: if to be olde and merry, be a
1431if to be fat, be to be hated, then Pharaohs leane Kine are
1437not him thy Harryes companie; banish plumpe Iacke, and
1438banish all the World.
1439Prince. I doe, I will.
1440 Enter Bardolph running.
1443Falst. Out you Rogue, play out the Play: I haue much
1445 Enter the Hostesse.
1446Hostesse. O, my Lord, my Lord.
1448sticke: what's the matter?
1449Hostesse. The Sherife and all the Watch are at the
1451them in?
1453Gold a Counterfeit: thou art essentially made, without
1457Falst. I deny your Maior: if you will deny the
1458Sherife, so: if not, let him enter. If I become not a Cart
1459as well as another man, a plague on my bringing vp: I
1461ther.
1463walke vp aboue. Now my Masters, for a true Face and
1464good Conscience.
1465Falst. Both which I haue had: but their date is out,
1466and therefore Ile hide me. Exit.
1467Prince. Call in the Sherife.
1468 Enter Sherife and the Carrier.
1470mee?
1472followed certaine men vnto this house.
1473Prince. What men?
1474She. One of them is well knowne, my gracious Lord,
1475a grosse fat man.
1476Car. As fat as Butter.
1478For I my selfe at this time haue imploy'd him:
1479And Sherife, I will engage my word to thee,
1480That I will by to morrow Dinner time,
1481Send him to answere thee, or any man,
1482For any thing he shall be charg'd withall:
1484She. I will, my Lord: there are two Gentlemen
1485Haue in this Robberie lost three hundred Markes.
1488She. Good Night, my Noble Lord.
1489Prince. I thinke it is good Morrow, is it not?
1490She. Indeede, my Lord, I thinke it be two a Clocke.
1491 Exit.
1493goe call him forth.
1497Pockets.
He
60 The First Part of King Henry the Fourth.
1498 He searcheth his Pockets, and findeth
1499certaine Papers.
1501Peto. Nothing but Papers, my Lord.
1504Item, Sawce iiii.d.
1505Item, Sacke, two Gallons. v.s.viii.d.
1506Item, Anchoues and Sacke after Supper. ii.s.vi.d.
1507Item, Bread. ob.
1509Bread to this intollerable deale of Sacke? What there is
1511let him sleepe till day. Ile to the Court in the Morning:
1513rable. Ile procure this fat Rogue a Charge of Foot,
1514and I know his death will be a Match of Twelue-score.
1515The Money shall be pay'd backe againe with aduantage.
1517row Peto.
1518Peto. Good morrow, good my Lord.
Exeunt.