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- Edition: As You Like It
As You Like It (Modern)
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We shall find a time, Audrey. Patience, gentle 2342Audrey.
Faith, the priest was good enough, for all 2344the old gentleman's saying.
A most wicked Sir Oliver, Audrey, a most vile 2346Mar-text. But Audrey, there is a youth here in the 2347forest lays claim to you.
Ay, I know who 'tis. He hath no interest in me 2349in the world. Here comes the man you mean.
2350Enter William.
It is meat and drink to me to see a clown. By 2352my troth, we that have good wits have much to answer 2353for. We shall be flouting; we cannot hold.
Good ev'n, Audrey.
God ye good ev'n, William.
And good ev'n to you, sir.
[He removes his hat.]
Good ev'n, gentle friend. Cover thy head, cover 2358thy head. Nay, prithee be covered. How old are you, 2359friend?
Five-and-twenty, sir.
A ripe age. Is thy name William?
William, sir.
A fair name. Wast born i'th'forest here?
Ay, sir, I thank God.
"Thank God" -- a good answer. 2366Art rich?
Faith, sir, so-so.
"So-so" is good, very good, very excellent good; 2369and yet it is not; it is but so-so. 2370Art thou wise?
Ay, sir, I have a pretty wit.
Why, thou say'st well. I do now remember a saying: 2373"The fool doth think he is wise, but the wise man 2374knows himself to be a fool." The heathen philosopher, 2375when he had a desire to eat a grape, would open 2376his lips when he put it into his mouth, meaning thereby 2377that grapes were made to eat and lips to open. 2378You do love this maid?
I do, sir.
Give me your hand. Art thou learned?
No, sir.
Then learn this of me: to have is to have. For 2383it is a figure in rhetoric that drink, being poured out 2384of a cup into a glass, by filling the one doth empty the 2385other; for all your writers do consent that ipse is he. 2386Now, you are not ipse, for I am he.
Which he, sir?
He, sir, that must marry this woman. Therefore, 2389you clown, abandon -- which is in the vulgar "leave" -- the 2390society -- which in the boorish is "company" -- of this female -- 2391which in the common is "woman"; which together 2392is: abandon the society of this female, or, clown, 2393thou perishest; or, to thy better understanding, diest; or, 2394to wit, I kill thee, make thee away, translate thy life into 2395death, thy liberty into bondage. I will deal in poison 2396with thee, or in bastinado, or in steel; I will bandy 2397with thee in faction, I will o'er-run thee with policy; I 2398will kill thee a hundred and fifty ways. Therefore tremble 2399and depart.
Do, good William.
God rest you merry, sir.
Exit.
2402Enter Corin.
Our master and mistress seeks you. Come away, 2404away!
Trip, Audrey, trip, Audrey! -- I attend, 2406I attend.
Exeunt.