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  • Title: The Merry Wives of Windsor (Quarto 1, 1602)

  • Copyright Internet Shakespeare Editions. This text may be freely used for educational, non-proift purposes; for all other uses contact the Coordinating Editor.
    Author: William Shakespeare
    Not Peer Reviewed

    The Merry Wives of Windsor (Quarto 1, 1602)

    Enter Mistresse Page, reading of
    552.1a Letter.
    Mis.Pa. Mistresse Page I loue you. Aske me no(reason,
    557.1Because theyr impossible to alledge. Your faire,
    And I am fat. Yon loue sack, so do I:
    As I am sure I haue no mind but to loue,
    562.1So I know you haue no hart but to grant
    A souldier doth not vse many words, where a (knowes
    A letter may serue for a sentence. I loue you,
    And so I leaue you.
    Yours Syr Iohn Falstaffe.
    A pleasant Comedie, of
    562.5Now Ieshu blesse me, am I methomorphised?
    I thinke I knowe not my selfe. Why what a Gods
    name doth this man see in me, that thus he shootes
    at my honestie? Well but that I knowe my owne
    heart, I should scarcely perswade my selfe I were
    562.10hand. Why what an vnreasonable woolsack is this.
    He was neuer twice in my companie, and if then I
    thought I gaue such assurauce with my eies, Ide pul
    them out, they should neuer see more holie daies.
    Well, I shall trust fat men the worse while I liue for
    his sake. O God that I knew how to be reuenged of
    577.1him. But in good time, heeres mistresse Foord.
    Enter Mistresse Foord.
    Mis. For. How now Mistris Page, are you reading
    Loue Letters? How do you woman?
    577.5Mis. Pa. O woman I am I know not what:
    In loue vp to the hard eares. I was neuer in such a
    case in my life.
    Mis. For. In loue, now in the name of God with
    577.10Mis. Pa. With one that sweares he loues me,
    And I must not choose but do the like againe:
    I prethie looke on that Letter.
    Mis. For. Ile match your letter iust with the like,
    614.1Line for line, word for word. Only the name
    Of misteris Page, and misteris Foord disagrees:
    Do me the kindnes to looke vpon this.
    Mis. Pa.Why this is right my letter.
    O most notorious villaine!
    Why what a bladder of iniquitie is this?
    Lets be reuenged what so ere we do.
    636.1Mis. For. Reuenged, if we liue weel be reuenged.
    O Lord
    the merry wives of windsor.
    O Lord if my husband should see this Letter,
    Ifaith this would euen giue edge to his Iealousie.
    642.1Enter Ford, Page, Pistoll and Nym.
    Mis. Pa. See where our husbands are,
    645Mine's as far from Iealousie,
    As I am from wronging him.
    645.1Pis. Ford the words I speake are forst:
    Beware, take heed, for Falstaffe loues thy wife:
    653.1When Pistoll lies do this.
    Ford. Why sir my wife is not young.
    655Pis. He wooes both yong and old, both rich and (poore
    None comes amis. I say he loues thy wife:
    656.1Faire warning did I giue, take heed,
    665For sommer comes, and Cuckoo birds appeare:
    665.1Page belieue him what he ses. Away sir Corporall(Nym.
    Exit Pistoll:
    Nym. Syr the humor of it is, he loues your wife,
    670I should ha borne the humor Letter to her:
    I speake and I auouch tis true: My name is Nym.
    675 Farwell, I loue not the humor of bread and cheese:
    675.1And theres the humor of it. Exit Nym.
    Pa. The humor of it, quoth you:
    Heres a fellow frites humor out of his wits.
    Mis. Pa. How now sweet hart, how dost thou?
    687.1Enter Mistresse Quickly.
    Pa. How now man? How do you mistris Ford?
    Mis. For. Well I thanke you good M. Page.
    How now husband, how chaunce thou art so me-
    Ford. Melancholy, I am not melancholy.
    690Goe get you in, goe.
    Mis. For. God saue me, see who yonder is:
    C Weele
    A pleasant Comedie, of
    Weele set her a worke in this businesse.
    Mis. Pa. O sheele serue excellent.
    Now you come to see my daughter An I am sure.
    Quic. I forsooth that is my comming.
    700Mis. Pa. Come go in with me. Come Mis. Ford.
    700.1Mis. For. I follow you Mistresse Page.
    Exit Mistresse Ford, Mis. Page, and Quickly.
    For. M. Page did you heare what these fellowes(said?
    Pa. Yes M. Ford, what of that sir?
    705For. Do you thinke it is true that they told vs?
    705.1Pa. No by my troth do I not,
    I rather take them to be paltry lying knaues,
    Such as rather speakes of enuie,
    Then of any certaine they haue
    705.5Of any thing. And for the knight, perhaps
    He hath spoke merrily, as the fashion of fat men
    Are: But should he loue my wife,
    Ifaith Ide turne her loose to him:
    And what he got more of her,
    705.10Then ill lookes, and shrowd words,
    Why let me beare the penaltie of it.
    For. Nay I do not mistrust my wife,
    Yet Ide be loth to turne them together,
    A man may be too confident.
    719.1Enter Host and Shallow.
    Pa. Here comes my ramping host of the garter,
    Ther's either licker in his hed, or mony in his purse,
    That he lookes so merily. Now mine Host?
    Host. God blesse you my bully rookes, God blesse(you.
    Cauelera Iustice I say.
    Shal. At hand mine host, at hand. M. Ford god den( to you.
    728.1God den an twentie good M. Page.
    I tell
    the merry wives of windsor.
    730I tell you sir we haue sport in hand.
    Host. Tell him cauelira Iustice: tell him bully(rooke.
    735Ford. Mine Host a the garter:
    735.1Host. What ses my bully rooke?
    Ford. A word with you sir.
    Ford and the Host talkes.
    Shal. Harke you sir, Ile tell you what the sport (shall be,
    Doctor Cayus and sir Hu are to fight,
    My merrie Host hath had the measuring
    Of their weapons, and hath
    Appointed them contrary places. Harke in your (eare:
    Host: Hast thou no shute against my knight,
    My guest, my cauellira:
    For. None I protest: But tell him my name
    Is Rrooke, onlie for a Iest.
    Host: My hand bully: Thou shalt
    Haue egres and regres, and thy
    Name shall be Brooke: Sed I well bully Hector?
    Shal. I tell you what M. Page, I beleeue
    740The Doctor is no Iester, heele laie it on:
    740.1For tho we be Iustices and Doctors,
    And Church men, yet we are
    The sonnes of women M. Page:
    Pa: True maister Shallow:
    740.5Shal: It will be found so maister Page:
    Pa. Maister Shallow you your selfe
    Haue bene a great fighter,
    Tho now a man of peace:
    Shal: M. Page I haue seene the day that yong
    Tall fellowes with their stroke & their passado,
    757.1I haue made them trudge Maister Page,
    755A tis the hart, the hart doth all: I
    C2 Haue
    A pleasant Comedie, of
    Haue seene the day, with my two hand sword
    I would a made you foure tall Fencers
    Scipped like Rattes.
    Host. Here boyes, shall we wag, shall we wag?
    760Shal. Ha with you mine host.
    760.1Exit Host and Shallow.
    Pa. Come M. Ford, shall we to dinner?
    I know these fellowes sticks in your minde.
    For. No in good sadnesse not in mine:
    765Yet for all this Ile try it further,
    765.1I will not leaue it so:
    Come M. Page, shall we to dinner?
    Pa. With all my hart sir, Ile follow you.
    Exit omnes.