Peer Reviewed
- Edition: Twelfth Night
Twelfth Night (Modern)
- Introduction
- Texts of this edition
- Facsimiles
13803.2
No, faith, I'll not stay a jot longer!
Thy reason, dear venom, give thy reason.
You must needs yield your reason, Sir 1385Andrew!
Marry, I saw your niece do more favors to the 1387count's serving-man than ever she bestowed upon me. 1388I saw't i'th'orchard.
Did she see thee the while, old boy, tell me that?
As plain as I see you now.
This was a great argument of love in her toward 1392you.
'Slight, will you make an ass o'me?
I will prove it legitimate, sir, upon the oaths of 1395judgment and reason.
And they have been grand-jurymen since before 1397Noah was a sailor.
She did show favor to the youth in your sight 1399only to exasperate you, to awake your dormouse valor, 1400to put fire in your heart, and brimstone in your liver. 1401You should then have accosted her, and with some 1402excellent jests, fire-new from the mint, you should have banged 1403the youth into dumbness. This was looked for at your 1404hand, and this was balked. The double gilt of this 1405opportunity you let time wash off, and you are now sailed into 1406the north of my lady's opinion, where you will hang 1407like an icicle on a Dutchman's beard, unless you do 1408redeem it by some laudable attempt, either of valor or 1409policy.
An't be any way, it must be with valor, for 1411policy I hate.[To the audience] I had as lief be a Brownist, as a 1412politician.
Why then, build me thy fortunes upon the basis of 1414valor. Challenge me the count's youth to fight with him, 1415hurt him in eleven places. My niece shall take note of it; 1416and assure thyself, there is no love-broker in the world 1417can more prevail in man's commendation with women 1418than report of valor.
There is no way but this, Sir Andrew.
Will either of you bear me a challenge to him?
Go, write it in a martial hand. Be cursed and brief. 1422It is no matter how witty, so it be eloquent, and full of 1423invention. Taunt him with the license of ink. If thou 1424"thou'st" him some thrice, it shall not be amiss; and as 1425many lies as will lie in thy sheet of paper, although the 1426sheet were big enough for the bed of Ware in 1427England, set 'em down. Go, about it! Let there be gall 1428enough in thy ink; though thou write with a goose-pen, 1429no matter. About it!
Where shall I find you?
We'll call thee at thy cubiculo. Go!
This is a dear manikin to you, Sir Toby.
I have been dear to him, lad, some two thousand 1435strong, or so.
We shall have a rare letter from him--but you'll 1437not deliver't?
Never trust me then; and by all means stir on 1439the youth to an answer. I think oxen and wainropes 1440cannot hale them together. For Andrew, if he were opened 1441and you find so much blood in his liver as will clog the 1442foot of a flea, I'll eat the rest of th'anatomy.
And his opposite, the youth, bears in his visage no 1444great presage of cruelty.
Look where the youngest wren of nine comes.
If you desire the spleen, and will laugh your 1448selves into stitches, follow me. Yond gull Malvolio is 1449turned heathen, a very renegado; for there is no Christian 1450that means to be saved by believing rightly can ever 1451believe such impossible passages of grossness. He's in 1452yellow stockings!
And cross-gartered?
Most villainously, like a pedant that keeps a 1455school i'th'church. I have dogged him like his 1456murderer. He does obey every point of the letter that I dropped 1457to betray him. He does smile his face into more lines 1458than is in the new map with the augmentation of the 1459Indies; you have not seen such a thing as 'tis. I can 1460hardly forbear hurling things at him; I know my lady will 1461strike him. If she do, he'll smile, and take't for a great 1462favor.
Come, bring us, bring us where he is!