The Merry Wives of Windsor (Folio 1, 1623)

 2010nest cloathes you send forth to bleaching.
 2011Page. Why, this passes M. Ford: you are not to goe
 2012loose any longer, you must be pinnion'd.
 2013Euans. Why, this is Lunaticks: this is madde, as a
 2014mad dogge.
 2015Shall. Indeed M. Ford, thi is not well indeed.
 2016Ford. So say I too Sir, come hither Mistris Ford, Mi-
 2017stris Ford, the honest woman, the modest wife, the vertu-
 2018ous creature, that hath the iealious foole to her husband:
 2019I suspect without cause (Mistris) do I?
 2020Mist. Ford. Heauen be my witnesse you doe, if you
 2021suspect me in any dishonesty.
 2022Ford. Well said Brazon-face, hold it out: Come forth
 2023sirrah.
 2024Page. This passes.
 2025Mist. Ford. Are you not asham'd, let the cloths alone.
 2026Ford. I shall finde you anon.
 2027Eua. 'Tis vnreasonable; will you take vp your wiues
 2028cloathes? Come, away.
 2029Ford. Empty the basket I say.
 2030M. Ford. Why man, why?
 2031Ford. Master Page, as I am a man, there was one con-
 2032uay'd out of my house yesterday in this basket: why
 2033may not he be there againe, in my house I am sure he is:
 2034my Intelligence is true, my iealousie is reasonable, pluck
 2035me out all the linnen.
 2036Mist. Ford. If you find a man there, he shall dye a Fleas
 2037death.
 2038Page. Heer's no man.
 2039Shal. By my fidelity this is not well Mr. Ford: This
 2040wrongs you.
 2041Euans. Mr Ford, you must pray, and not follow the
 2042imaginations of your owne heart: this is iealousies.
 2043Ford. Well, hee's not heere I seeke for.
 2044Page. No, nor no where else but in your braine.
 2045Ford. Helpe to search my house this one time: if I find
 2046not what I seeke, shew no colour for my extremity: Let
 2047me for euer be your Table-sport: Let them say of me, as
 2048iealous as Ford, that search'd a hollow Wall-nut for his
 2049wiues Lemman. Satisfie me once more, once more serch
 2050with me.
 2051M. Ford. What hoa (Mistris Page,) come you and
 2052the old woman downe: my husband will come into the
 2053Chamber.
 2054Ford. Old woman? what old womans that?
 2055M. Ford. Why it is my maids Aunt of Brainford.
 2056Ford. A witch, a Queane, an olde couzening queane:
 2057Haue I not forbid her my house. She comes of errands
 2058do's she? We are simple men, wee doe not know what's
 2059brought to passe vnder the profession of Fortune-telling.
 2060She workes by Charmes, by Spels, by th'Figure, & such
 2061dawbry as this is, beyond our Element: wee know no-
 2062thing. Come downe you Witch, you Hagge you, come
 2063downe I say.
 2064Mist. Ford. Nay, good sweet husband, good Gentle-
 2065men, let him strike the old woman.
 2066Mist. Page. Come mother Prat, Come giue me your
 2067hand.
 2068Ford. Ile Prat-her: Out of my doore, you Witch,
 2069you Ragge, you Baggage, you Poulcat, you Runnion,
 2070out, out: Ile coniure you, Ile fortune-tell you.
 2071Mist. Page. Are you not asham'd?
 2072I thinke you haue kill'd the poore woman.
 2073Mist. Ford. Nay he will do it, 'tis a goodly credite
 2074for you.
 2075Ford. Hang her witch.

 2076Eua. By yea, and no, I thinke the o'man is a witch in-
 2077deede: I like not when a o'man has a great peard; I spie
 2078a great peard vnder his muffler.
 2079Ford. Will you follow Gentlemen, I beseech you fol-
 2080low: see but the issue of my iealousie: If I cry out thus
 2081vpon no traile, neuer trust me when I open againe.
 2082Page. Let's obey his humour a little further:
 2083Come Gentlemen.
 2084Mist. Page. Trust me he beate him most pittifully.
 2085Mist. Ford. Nay by th'Masse that he did not: he beate
 2086him most vnpittifully, me thought.
 2087Mist. Page. Ile haue the cudgell hallow'd, and hung
 2088ore the Altar, it hath done meritorious seruice.
 2089Mist. Ford. What thinke you? May we with the war-
 2090rant of woman-hood, and the witnesse of a good consci-
 2091ence, pursue him with any further reuenge?
 2092M. Page. The spirit of wantonnesse is sure scar'd out
 2093of him, if the diuell haue him not in fee-simple, with
 2094fine and recouery, he will neuer (I thinke) in the way of
 2095waste, attempt vs againe.
 2096Mist. Ford. Shall we tell our husbands how wee haue
 2097seru'd him?
 2098Mist. Page. Yes, by all meanes: if it be but to scrape
 2099the figures out of your husbands braines: if they can find
 2100in their hearts, the poore vnuertuous fat Knight shall be
 2101any further afflicted, wee two will still bee the mini-
 2102sters. 
 2103Mist. Ford. Ile warrant, they'l haue him publiquely
 2104sham'd, and me thinkes there would be no period to the
 2105iest, should he not be publikely sham'd.
 2106Mist. Page. Come, to the Forge with it, then shape it:
 2107I would not haue things coole.   Exeunt
 
 
 2108Scena Tertia. 
 
 
 2109Enter Host and Bardolfe.
 2110Bar. Sir, the Germane desires to haue three of your
 2111horses: the Duke himselfe will be to morrow at Court,
 2112and they are going to meet him.
 2113Host. What Duke should that be comes so secretly?
 2114I heare not of him in the Court: let mee speake with the
 2115Gentlemen, they speake English?
 2116Bar. I Sir? Ile call him to you.
 2117Host. They shall haue my horses, but Ile make them
 2118pay: Ile sauce them, they haue had my houses a week at
 2119commaund: I haue turn'd away my other guests, they
 2120must come off, Ile sawce them, come.   Exeunt
 
 
 2121Scena Quarta. 
 
 
 2122Enter Page, Ford, Mistris Page, Mistris
 2123Ford, and Euans.
 2124Eua. 'Tis one of the best discretions of a o'man as e-
 2125uer I did looke vpon.
 2126Page. And did he send you both these Letters at an
 2127instant?
 2128Mist. Page. VVithin a quarter of an houre.
 2129Ford. Pardon me (wife) henceforth do what yu wilt:
 2130I rather will suspect the Sunne with gold,
 2131Then thee with wantonnes: Now doth thy honor stand

(In

Internet Shakespeare Editions

Reading Room

Toolbox

About this text

The Merry Wives of Windsor (Folio 1, 1623)