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  • Title: The Famous Victories of Henry the Fifth (Quarto, 1598)
  • Editors: Karen Sawyer Marsalek, Mathew Martin
  • Coordinating editor: Janelle Jenstad

  • Copyright Queen's Men Editions. This text may be freely used for educational, non-profit purposes; for all other uses contact the Editor.
    Author: Anonymous
    Editors: Karen Sawyer Marsalek, Mathew Martin
    Peer Reviewed

    The Famous Victories of Henry the Fifth (Quarto, 1598)

    Enters Dericke, with his girdle full of shooes.
    Der. How now? Sownes it did me good to see how
    1555I did triumph ouer the French men.
    Enters
    The famous victories
    Enters Iohn Cobler rouing, with a packe full
    of apparell.
    Iohn. Whoope Dericke, how doest thou?
    Der. What Iohn, Comedeuales, aliue yet.
    1560Iohn. I promise thee Dericke, I scapte hardly,
    For I was within halfe a mile when one was kild.
    Der. Were you so?
    Iohn. I trust me, I had like bene slaine.
    Der. But once kild, why it tis nothing,
    1565 I was foure or fiue times slaine.
    Iohn. Foure or fiue times slaine.
    Why how couldst thou haue beene aliue now?
    Der. O Iohn, neuer say so,
    For I was cald the bloodie souldier amongst them all.
    1570Iohn. Why what didst thou?
    Der. Why I will tell thee Iohn,
    Euery day when I went into the field,
    I would take a straw and thrust it into my nose,
    And make my nose bleed, and then I wold go into the field,
    1575And when the Captaine saw me, he would say,
    Peace a bloodie souldier, and bid me stand aside,
    Whereof I was glad:
    But marke the chance Iohn.
    I went and stood behinde a tree, but marke then Iohn.
    1580I thought I had beene safe, but on a sodaine,
    There steps to me a lustie tall French man,
    Now he drew, and I drew,
    Now I lay here, and he lay there,
    Now I set this leg before, and turned this backward,
    1585And skipped quite ouer a hedge,
    And he saw me no more there that day,
    And was not this well done Iohn?
    Iohn. Masse Dericke, thou hast a wittie head.
    Der. I Iohn, thou maist see, if thou hadst takẽ my coũsel,
    1590But what hast thou there?
    I thinke
    of Henry the fifth.
    I thinke thou hast bene robbing the French men.
    Iohn. I faith Dericke, I haue gotten some reparrell
    To carry home to my wife.
    Der. And I haue got some shooes,
    1595 For ile tel thee what I did, when they were dead,
    I would go take off all their shooes.
    Iohn. I but Dericke, how shall we get home?
    Der. Nay sownds, and they take thee,
    They wil hang thee,
    1600 O Iohn, neuer do so, if it be thy fortune to be hangd,
    Be hangd in thy owne language whatsoeuer thou doest.
    Iohn. Why Dericke the warres is done,
    We may go home now.
    Der. I but you may not go before you aske the king leaue,
    1605But I know a way to go home, and aske the king no leaue.
    Iohn. How is that Dericke?
    Der. Why Iohn, thou knowest the Duke of Yorkes
    Funerall must be carried into England, doest thou not?
    Iohn. I that I do.
    1610Der. Why then thou knowest weele go with it.
    Iohn. I but Dericke how shall we do for to meet them?
    Der. Sowndes if I make not shift to meet them, hang me.
    Sirra, thou knowst that in euery Towne there wil
    Be ringing, and there wil be cakes and drinke,
    1615Now I wil go to the Clarke and Sexton
    And keepe a talking, and say, O this fellow rings well,
    And thou shalt go and take a peece of cake, then ile ring,
    And thou shalt say, oh this fellow keepes a good stint,
    And then I will go drinke to thee all the way:
    1620But I maruel what my dame wil say when we come home,
    Because we haue not a French word to cast at a Dog
    By the way?
    Iohn. Why what shall we do Dericke?
    Der. Why Iohn, ile go before and call my dame whore,
    1625And thou shalt come after and set fire on the house,
    G We
    The famous victories
    We may do it Iohn, for ile proue it,
    Because we be souldiers.
    The Trumpets sound.
    Iohn. Dericke helpe me to carry my shooes and bootes.