1739 Enter the Pedant, Curate and Dull. 1740Pedant. Satis quid sufficit.
1741Curat. I prai
se God for you
sir, your rea
sons at dinner
1742haue beene
sharpe &
sententious: plea
sant without
scur
- 1743rillity, witty without a
ffe
ction, audacious without im
- 1744pudency, learned without opinion, and
strange without
1745here
sie: I did conuer
se this
quondam day with a compa
- 1746nion of the Kings, who is intituled, nominated, or called,
1747Don Adriano de Armatho.
1748Ped. Noui hominum tanquam te, His humour is lofty,
1749his di
scour
se peremptorie: his tongue
filed, his eye
1750ambitious, his gate maie
sticall, and his generall behaui
- 1751our vaine, ridiculous, and thra
sonicall. He is too picked,
1752too
spruce, too a
ffe
cted, too odde, as it were, too pere
- 1753grinat, as I may call it.
M2 Curat.
136 Loues Labour's lost
1754Curat. A mo
st singular and choi
se Epithat,
1755 Draw out his Table-booke. 1756Peda. He draweth out the thred of his verbo
sitie,
fi- 1757ner then the
staple of his argument. I abhor
such pha
- 1758naticall phanta
sims,
such in
sociable and poynt deui
se
1759companions,
such rackers of ortagriphie, as to
speake
1760dout
fine, when he
should
say doubt; det, when he
shold
1761pronounce debt; d e b t, not det: he clepeth a Calf, Caufe:
1762halfe, haufe: neighbour
vocatur nebour; neigh abreuiated
1763ne: this is abhominable, which he would call abhomi
- 1764nable it in
sinuateth me of infamie:
ne inteligis domine, to
1765make franticke, lunaticke?
1766Cura. Laus deo, bene intelligo.
1767Peda. Bome boon for
boon pre
scian, a little
scratcht, 'twil
1770Curat. Vides ne quis venit?
1771Peda. Video, & gaudio.
1773Peda. Quari Chirra, not Sirra?
1774Brag. Men of peace well incountred.
1775Ped. Mo
st millitarie
sir
salutation.
1776Boy. They haue beene at a great fea
st of Languages,
1777and
stolne the
scraps.
1778Clow. O they haue liu'd long on the almes-ba
sket of
1779words. I maruell thy M. hath not eaten thee for a word,
1780for thou art not
so long by the head as
honorificabilitu- 1781dinitatibus: Thou art ea
sier
swallowed then a
flapdra
- 1783Page. Peace, the peale begins.
1784Brag. Moun
sier, are you not lettred?
1785Page. Yes, yes, he teaches boyes the Horne-booke:
1786What is Ab
speld backward with the horn on his head?
1787Peda. Ba,
puericia with a horne added.
1788Pag. Ba mo
st seely Sheepe, with a horne: you heare
1790Peda. Quis quis, thou Con
sonant?
1791Pag. The la
st of the
fiue Vowels if You repeat them,
1793Peda. I will repeat them: a e I.
1794Pag. The Sheepe, the other two concludes it o u.
1795Brag. Now by the
salt waue of the
mediteranium, a
1796sweet tutch, a quicke venewe of wit,
snip
snap, quick &
1797home, it reioyceth my intelle
ct, true wit.
1798Page. O
ffered by a childe to an olde man: which is
1800Peda. What is the
figure? What is the
figure?
1802Peda. Thou di
sputes like an Infant: goe whip thy
1804Pag. Lend me your Horne to make one, and I will
1805whip about your Infamie
vnum cita a gigge of a Cuck
- 1807Clow. And I had but one penny in the world, thou
1808should
st haue it to buy Ginger bread: Hold, there is the
1809very Remuneration I had of thy Mai
ster, thou halfpenny
1810pur
se of wit, thou Pidgeon-egge of di
scretion. O & the
1811heauens were
so plea
sed, that thou wert but my Ba
stard;
1812What a ioyfull father would
st thou make mee? Goe to,
1813thou ha
st it
ad dungil, at the
fingers ends, as they
say.
1814Peda. Oh I
smell fal
se Latine,
dunghel for
vnguem.
1815Brag. Arts-man preambulat, we will bee
singled from
1816the barbarous. Do you not educate youth at the Charg
- 1817hou
se on the top of the Mountaine?
1818Peda. Or
Mons the hill.
1819Brag. At your
sweet plea
sure, for the Mountaine.
1820Peda. I doe
sans question.
1821Bra. Sir, it is the Kings mo
st sweet plea
sure and af
- 1822fe
ction, to congratulate the Prince
sse at her Pauilion, in
1823the
posteriors of this day, which the rude multitude call
1825Ped. The
posterior of the day, mo
st generous
sir, is lia
- 1826ble, congruent, and mea
surable for the after-noone: the
1827word is well culd, cho
se,
sweet, and apt I doe a
ssure you
1829Brag. Sir, the King is a noble Gentleman, and my fa
- 1830miliar, I doe a
ssure ye very good friend: for what is in
- 1831ward betweene vs, let it pa
sse. I doe be
seech thee re
- 1832member thy curte
sie. I be
seech thee apparell thy head:
1833and among other importunate & mo
st serious de
signes,
1834and of great import indeed too: but let that pa
sse, for I
1835mu
st tell thee it will plea
se his Grace (by the world)
1836sometime to leane vpon my poore
shoulder, and with
1837his royall
finger thus dallie with my excrement, with my
1838mu
stachio: but
sweet heart, let that pa
sse. By the world
1839I recount no fable,
some certaine
speciall honours it
1840plea
seth his greatne
sse to impart to
Armado a Souldier,
1841a man of trauell, that hath
seene the world: but let that
1842pa
sse; the very all of all is: but
sweet heart I do implore
1843secrecie, that the King would haue mee pre
sent the
1844Prince
sse (
sweet chucke) with
some delightfull o
stenta
- 1845tion, or
show, or pageant, or anticke, or
fire-worke:
1846Now, vnder
standing that the Curate and your
sweet
self
1847are good at
such eruptions, and
sodaine breaking out of
1848myrth (as it were) I haue acquainted you withall, to
1849the end to craue your a
ssistance.
1850Peda. Sir, you
shall pre
sent before her the Nine Wor
- 1851thies. Sir
Holofernes, as concerning
some entertainment
1852of time,
some
show in the po
sterior of this day, to bee
1853rendred by our a
ssistants the Kings command: and this
1854mo
st gallant, illu
strate and learned Gentleman, before
1855the Prince
sse: I
say none
so
fit as to pre
sent the Nine
1857Curat. Where will you
finde men worthy enough to
1859Peda. Iosua, your
selfe: my
selfe, and this gallant gen
- 1860tleman
Iudas Machabeus; this Swaine (becau
se of his
1861great limme or ioynt)
shall pa
sse
Pompey the great, the
1863Brag. Pardon
sir, error: He is not quantitie enough
1864for that Worthies thumb, hee is not
so big as the end of
1866Peda. Shall I haue audience? he
shall pre
sent
Hercu- 1867les in minoritie: his
enter and
exit shall bee
strangling a
1868Snake; and I will haue an Apologie for that purpo
se.
1869Pag. An excellent deuice:
so if any of the audience
1870hi
sse, you may cry, Well done
Hercules, now thou cru
- 1871she
st the Snake; that is the way to make an o
ffence gra
- 1872cious, though few haue the grace to doe it.
1873Brag. For the re
st of the Worthies?
1874Peda. I will play three my
selfe.
1875Pag. Thrice worthy Gentleman.
1876Brag. Shall I tell you a thing?
1878Brag. We will haue, if this fadge not, an Antique. I
1880Ped. Via good-man
Dull, thou ha
st spoken no word
1882Dull. Nor vnder
stood none neither
sir.
1883Ped. Alone, we will employ thee.
1884Dull. Ile make one in a dance, or
so: or I will play
M2v on
Loues Labour's lost137
1885on the taber to the Worthies, & let them dance the hey.
1886Ped. Mo
st Dull, hone
st Dull, to our
sport away.
Exit.