Internet Shakespeare Editions

Author: Anonymous
Peer Reviewed

Famous Victories of Henry V (Modern)

[Scene 10] [Video Sc.10]
Enter a Captain, John Cobbler[,] and his Wife.
Captain
Come, come, there's no remedy. Thou must needs serve the king.
990John
Good Master Captain, let me go. I am not able to go so far.
Wife
I pray you, good Master Captain, be good to my husband.
Captain
Why, I am sure he is not too good to serve the king?
995John
Alas, no, but a great deal too bad. Therefore I pray you let me go.
Captain
No, no, thou shalt go.
John
Oh, sir, I have a great many shoes at home to cobble.
I pray you let him go home again.
Captain
Tush, I care not. Thou shalt go.
Oh, wife, an you had been a loving wife to me, this had not been, for I have said many times that I would go away, and now I must go 1005against my will.
He weepeth. Enter Derrick [with a pot lid for a shield].
Derrick
How now! Ho, basillus manus, for an old codpiece! Master Captain, shall we away? 1010Zounds, how now, John, what, a-crying? What make you and my dame there? [To Wife] I marvel whose head you will throw the stools at now we are gone.
I'll tell you! Come, ye cloghead, 1015what do you with my pot lid? Hear you, will you have it rapped about your pate?
She beateth him with her pot lid.
Derrick
Oh, good dame!Here he shakes her[.]An I had my dagger here, I would worry you all to pieces, 1020that I would.
Would you so? I'll try that.
She beateth him.
Derrick
Master Captain, will ye suffer her? Go to, dame! I will go back as far as I can, 1025but, an you come again, I'll clap the law on your back, that's flat. I'll tell you, Master Captain, what you shall do. Press her for a soldier. I warrant you, she will do as much good as her husband and I too.
1030Enter the Thief [Cutbert Cutter].
Zounds, who comes yonder?
Captain
How now, good fellow. Dost thou want a master?
Cutbert Cutter
Ay, truly sir.
Captain
Hold thee, then. I press thee for a soldier 1035to serve the king in France.
Derrick
How now, Gads! What, dost know 's, thinkest?
Cutbert Cutter
Ay, I knew thee long ago.
Derrick
Hear you, Master Captain?
Captain
What say'st thou?
1040Derrick
I pray you let me go home again.
Captain
Why, what wouldst thou do at home?
Derrick
Marry, I have brought two shirts with me, and I would carry one of them home again, for I am sure he'll steal it from me, 1045he is such a filching fellow.
Captain
I warrant thee he will not steal it from thee. Come, let's away.
Derrick
Come, Master Captain, let's away. Come, follow me.
Come, wife, let's part lovingly.
Farewell, good husband.
[They embrace tearfully.]
Derrick
Fie, what a kissing and crying is here! [To Wife] Zounds, do ye think he will never come again? [To John] Why, John, come away! Dost think that we are so base-1055minded to die among Frenchmen? Zounds, we know not whether they will lay us in their church or no. Come, Master Captain, let's away.
Captain
I cannot stay no longer, therefore come away.
Exeunt omnes.