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- Edition: Henry V
Henry V (Modern, Folio)
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2896.1[5.1]
2897Enter Fluellen and Gower.
Nay, that's right. But why wear you your 2899leek today? Saint Davy's day is past.
There is occasions and causes why and wherefore 2901in all things. I will tell you ass my friend, Captain 2902Gower. The rascally, scald, beggarly, lousy, pragging 2903knave Pistol, which you and yourself and all the world 2904know to be no petter than a fellow, look you now, of no 2905merits, he is come to me and prings me pread and 2906salt yesterday, look you, and bid me eat my leek. 2907It was in a place where I could not breed no contention 2908with him, but I will be so bold as to wear it in my cap 2909till I see him once again, and then I will tell him a little 2910piece of my desires.
2911Enter Pistol.
Why, here he comes, swelling like a 2913turkey-cock.
'Tis no matter for his swellings nor his 2915turkey-cocks. -- God pless you, Aunchient Pistol, you scurvy 2916lousy knave, God pless you.
Ha, art thou bedlam? Dost thou thirst, base 2918Trojan, to have me fold up Parca's fatal web? Hence! 2919I am qualmish at the smell of leek.
I peseech you heartily, scurvy lousy knave, at 2921my desires, and my requests, and my petitions, to eat, 2922look you, this leek. Because, look you, you do not 2923love it, nor your affections and your appetites and your 2924disgestions does not agree with it, I would desire you 2925to eat it.
Not for Cadwallader and all his goats.
There is one goat for you. Strikes him [with a cudgel]
2928Will you be so good, scald knave, as eat it?
Base Trojan, thou shalt die.
You say very true, scald knave, when God's 2931will is. I will desire you to live in the meantime, and 2932eat your victuals. Come, there is sauce for it. [Strikes him] You 2933called me yesterday mountain squire, but I will make 2934you today a squire of low degree. I pray you, fall to. If 2935you can mock a leek, you can eat a leek.
Enough, captain. You have astonished him.
I say I will make him eat some part of my leek, 2938or I will peat his pate four days. -- Bite, I pray you. It is 2939good for your green wound and your ploody 2940coxcomb.
Must I bite?
Yes, certainly, and out of doubt and out of 2943question, too, and ambiguities.
By this leek, I will most horribly revenge -- [Fluellen threatens him.] I 2945eat and eat, I swear.
Eat, I pray you. Will you have some more sauce 2947to your leek? There is not enough leek to swear by.
Quiet thy cudgel! Thou dost see I eat.
Much good do you, scald knave, heartily. Nay, 2950pray you throw none away; the skin is good for your 2951broken coxcomb. When you take occasions to see 2952leeks hereafter, I pray you mock at 'em, that is all.
Good.
Ay, leeks is good. Hold you, there is a groat to 2955heal your pate.
5.1.20.1[Offers money]
Me a groat?
Yes, verily, and in truth you shall take it, or I have 2958another leek in my pocket which you shall eat.
I take thy groat in earnest of revenge.
If I owe you anything, I will pay you in 2961cudgels. You shall be a woodmonger, and buy nothing of 2962me but cudgels. God b'wi'you, and keep you, and heal 2963your pate.
Exit.
All hell shall stir for this.
Go, go, you are a counterfeit cowardly knave. 2966Will you mock at an ancient tradition, begun upon an 2967honorable respect, and worn as a memorable trophy 2968of predeceased valor, and dare not avouch in your deeds 2969any of your words? I have seen you gleeking and galling 2970at this gentleman twice or thrice. You thought because 2971he could not speak English in the native garb he could 2972not therefore handle an English cudgel. You find it 2973otherwise, and henceforth let a Welsh correction teach 2974you a good English condition. Fare ye well.
Exit.
Doth fortune play the hussy with me now? 2976News have I that my Doll is dead i'th'Spital of a 2977malady of France, and there my rendezvous is quite cut off. 2978Old I do wax, and from my weary limbs honor is 2979cudgeled. Well, bawd I'll turn, and something lean to 2980cutpurse of quick hand. To England will I steal, and 2981there I'll steal.
Exit.