Henry IV, Part 1 (Modern) :: Internet Shakespeare Editions

 734[2.2]
 735Enter Prince, Poins, and Peto.
 2.2.1736Poins
 Come, shelter, shelter! I have removed Falstaff's horse, 737and he frets like a gummed velvet. 
 2.2.2738Prince
 Stand close.
 2.2.2.1[Poins and Peto hide.]
 2.2.2.2739 Enter Falstaff.
 2.2.3740Falstaff
 Poins! Poins, and be hanged! Poins!
 2.2.4741Prince
 Peace, ye fat-kidneyed rascal! What a brawling dost thou 742keep!
 2.2.5743Falstaff
 Where's Poins, Hal?
 2.2.6744Prince
 He is walked up to the top of the hill. I'll go seek him.
 2.2.6.1[He joins Poins and Peto]
 2.2.7746Falstaff
 I am accursed to rob in that thief's company. The rascal 747hath removed my horse and tied him I know not where. If I 748travel but four foot by the square further afoot, I shall break 749my wind. Well, I doubt not but to die a fair death, for all 750this if I scape hanging for killing that rogue.  I have forsworn 751his company hourly any time this two-and-twenty years, and yet I am 752bewitched with the rogue's company. If the rascal have not 754given me medicines to make me love him, I'll be hanged. It could 755not be else -- I have drunk medicines. Poins! Hal! A plague 756upon you both! Bardolph! Peto! I'll starve ere I'll rob a foot 757further. An 'twere not as good a deed as drink to turn true 758man and to leave these rogues, I am the veriest varlet that ever 759chewed with a tooth. Eight yards of uneven ground is 760threescore and ten miles afoot with me, and the stony-hearted 761villains know it well enough. A plague upon it when thieves 762cannot be true one to another! 763
 2.2.7.1They whistle.
 2.2.8764Whew! A plague upon you all!
 2.2.8.1[Prince, Poins and Peto come forward(?)]
 2.2.9Give me my horse, you rogues; 765give me my horse, and be hanged!
 2.2.10766Prince
 Peace, ye fat-guts. Lie down, lay thine ear close to the 767ground, and list if thou canst hear the tread of travelers.
 2.2.11769Falstaff
 Have you any levers to lift me up again, being down? 770'Sblood, I'll not bear my own flesh so far afoot again for 771all the coin in thy father's exchequer. What a plague mean 772ye to colt me thus?
 2.2.12773Prince
 Thou liest: thou art not colted, thou art uncolted.
 2.2.13774Falstaff
 I prithee, good Prince Hal, help me to my horse, good 775king's son.
 2.2.14776Prince
 Out, ye rogue, shall I be your ostler?
 2.2.15777Falstaff
 Hang thyself in thine own heir-apparent garters! 778If I be ta'en, I'll peach for this. An I have not ballads made on 779you all and sung to filthy tunes, let a cup of sack be my 780poison. When a jest is so forward -- and afoot too -- I hate it.
 2.2.15.1782Enter Gadshill [and Bardolph(?)].
 2.2.16783Gadshill
 Stand!
 2.2.17Falstaff
 So I do, against my will.
 2.2.18785Poins
 Oh, 'tis our setter, I know his voice. Bardolph, what news?
 2.2.19787Bardolph
 Case ye, case ye, on with your vizards! There's money 788of the king's coming down the hill; 'tis going to the king's 789exchequer.
 2.2.20790Falstaff
 You lie, ye rogue, 'tis going to the king's tavern.
 2.2.21791Gadshill
 There's enough to make us all.
 2.2.22792Falstaff
 To be hanged.
 2.2.23793Prince
 Sirs, you four shall front them in the narrow lane. Ned 794Poins and I will walk lower. If they scape from your 795encounter, then they light on us.
 2.2.24796Peto
 How many be there of them?
 2.2.25797Gadshill
 Some eight or ten.
 2.2.26798Falstaff
 Zounds, will they not rob us?
 2.2.27799Prince
 What, a coward, Sir John Paunch?
 2.2.28800Falstaff
 Indeed I am not John of Gaunt your grandfather, but 801yet no coward, Hal.
 2.2.29802Prince
 Well, we leave that to the proof.
 2.2.30803Poins
 Sirrah Jack, thy horse stands behind the hedge. When 804thou need'st him, there thou shalt find him. Farewell, and stand fast.
 2.2.31806Falstaff
 Now cannot I strike him if I should be hanged.
 2.2.32807Prince
 [Aside to Poins] Ned, where are our disguises?
 2.2.33808Poins
 [Aside to the prince] Here, hard by, stand close.
 2.2.33.1[Exeunt Prince and Poins.]
 2.2.34809Falstaff
 Now, my masters, happy man be his dole, say I; every 810man to his business.
 2.2.34.1811Enter the travelers.
 2.2.35812[First Traveler]
 Come, neighbor, the boy shall lead our horses down 813the hill. We'll walk afoot a while, and ease their legs.
 2.2.36815Thieves
 Stand!
 Traveler
 Jesus bless us!
 2.2.37817Falstaff
 Strike, down with them, cut the villains' throats. Ah, 818whoreson caterpillars, bacon-fed knaves! They hate us youth. 819Down with them, fleece them!
 2.2.38820Traveler
 Oh, we are undone, both we and ours forever!
 2.2.39821Falstaff
 Hang, ye gorbellied knaves, are ye undone? No, ye fat 822chuffs, I would your store were here. On, bacons, on! What, ye 823knaves, young men must live. You are grand-jurors, are ye? We'll 824jure ye, faith.
 2.2.39.1825Here they rob them and bind them. Exeunt.
 2.2.39.2826Enter the prince and Poins.
 2.2.40827Prince
 The thieves have bound the true men. Now could 828thou and I rob the thieves and go merrily to London, it would 829be argument for a week, laughter for a month, and a good jest 830forever.
 2.2.41831Poins
 Stand close, I hear them coming.
 2.2.41.1[They hide.]
 2.2.41.2832Enter the thieves again.
 2.2.42833Falstaff
 Come, my masters, let us share, and then to horse before 834day. An the prince and Poins be not two arrant cowards, 835there's no equity stirring. There's no more valor in that Poins 836than in a wild duck. 
 2.2.42.1839As they are sharing the prince and Poins set upon them.
 2.2.43837Prince
 Your money.
 2.2.44838Poins
 Villains!
 2.2.44.1They all run away, and Falstaff after a blow or two runs away840 too, leaving the booty behind them.
 2.2.45841Prince
 Got with much ease. Now merrily to horse. The thieves 842are all scattered and possessed with fear so strongly that they dare 843not meet each other. Each takes his fellow for an officer. Away, 844good Ned. Falstaff sweats to death, and lards the lean earth 845as he walks along. Were't not for laughing, I should pity him.
 2.2.46847Poins
 How the fat rogue roared!
 2.2.46.1Exeunt.