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The Merry Wives of Windsor (Modern, Quarto)
Mistress Page, I love you. Ask me no reason,557.1314 Because they're impossible to allege. You're fair,561315 and I am fat. You love sack; so do I.562316 As I am sure I have no mind but to love,562.1317 So I know you have no heart but to grant. 562.2318 A soldier doth not use many words, where 'a knows562.3319 a letter may serve for a sentence. I love you,562.4320 and so I leave you.567321 Yours, Sir John Falstaff.
562.5322 Now Jesu bless me, am I metamorphized?562.6323 I think I know not myself. Why, what i' God's562.7324 name doth this man see in me, that thus he shoots562.8325 at my honesty? Well, but that I know my own562.9326 heart, I should scarcely persuade myself I were562.10327 hand. Why, what an unreasonable woolsack is this?562.11328 He was never twice in my company, and if then I562.12329 thought I gave such assurance with my eyes, I'd pull562.13330 them out. They should never see more holy days.562.14331 Well, I shall trust fat men the worse while I live for577332 his sake. O God, that I knew how to be revenged of577.1333 him! But in good time, here's Mistress Ford.
O woman, I am I know not what:577.6338 in love up to the hard ears. I was never in such a577.7339 case in my life.
With one that swears he loves me,577.11343 and I must not choose but do the like again.577.12344 I prithee look on that letter.
[She gives her letter to Mistress Ford, who glances at it and pulls out another letter.]
I'll match your letter just with the like,614.1346 line for line, word for word. Only the name347 of Mistress Page and Mistress Ford disagrees.614.2348 Do me the kindness to look upon this.
Why, this is right my letter.614.4350 Oh, most notorious villain!614.6351 Why, what a bladder of iniquity is this?636352 Let's be revenged whatsoe'er we do.
Revenged? If we live, we'll be revenged!641354 O Lord, if my husband should see this letter,642355 i'faith, this would even give edge to his jealousy.
[Aside to Mistress Page] See where our husbands are.645358 Mine's as far from jealousy359 as I am from wronging him.
[They continue to talk apart from the men.]
Ford, the words I speak are forced:
[He mimes a violent death blow against himself.]
Why, sir, my wife is not young.
He woos both young and old, both rich and poor.
Sir, the humor of it is, he loves your wife.670371 I should ha' borne the humor letter to her.674372 I speak and I avouch 'tis true. My name is Nym.675373 Farewell. I love not the humor of bread and cheese,675.1374 and there's the humor of it.
5.19.1 Exit Nym.
"The humor of it," quoth you!376 Here's a fellow frights humor out of his wits.
[The wives come forward to greet their husbands.]
How now, sweetheart, how dost thou?
[To Ford] How now, man? -- How do you, Mistress Ford?
Well, I thank you, good Master Page.381 -- How now, husband, how chance thou art so688382 melancholy?
[Aside to Mistress Page, looking at Mistress Quickly] God save me, see who yonder is.386 We'll set her a-work in this business.
[Aside to Mistress Ford] Oh, she'll serve excellent. -- [To Mistress Quickly]697388 Now you come to see my daughter Anne, I am sure.
Ay, forsooth, that is my coming.
Come, go in with me. Come, Mistress Ford.
I follow you, Mistress Page.
Master Page, did you hear what these fellows said?
Yes, Master Ford, what of that, sir?
Do you think it is true that they told us?
No, by my troth, do I not.705.2397 I rather take them to be paltry lying knaves,705.3398 such as rather speaks of envy,705.4399 than of any certain they have705.5400 of anything. And for the knight, perhaps705.6401 he hath spoke merrily, as the fashion of fat men705.7402 are, but should he love my wife,705.8403 i'faith, I'd turn her loose to him,705.9404 and what he got more of her705.10405 than ill looks and shrewd words,705.11406 why, let me bear the penalty of it.
Nay, I do not mistrust my wife;408 yet I'd be loath to turn them together.719409 A man may be too confident.
Here comes my ramping host of the Garter.723412 There's either liquor in his head, or money in his purse,724413 that he looks so merrily. -- [Greeting him] Now, mine host?
God bless you, my bully rooks, God bless you.727415 -- [Calling to Shallow] Cavaliero Justice, I say.
At hand, mine host, at hand. -- Master Ford, god den to you.728.1417 -- God den an' twenty, good Master Page.730418 I tell you, sir, we have sport in hand.
Tell him, Cavaliero Justice, tell him, bully rook.
[Nodding the Host aside] Mine host o'the Garter.
What says my bully rook?
A word with you, sir.
[To Page] Hark you, sir, I'll tell you what the sport shall be:733425 Doctor Caius and Sir Hugh are to fight.737426 My merry host hath had the measuring738427 of their weapons, and hath428 appointed them contrary places. Hark in your ear.
[Shallow and Page talk aside.]
Hast thou no suit against my knight,430 my guest, my cavaliero?
My hand, bully. [They shake hands.] Thou shalt434 have egress and regress, and thy748435 name shall be Brook. Said I well, bully Hector?
I tell you what, Master Page, I believe740437 the doctor is no jester. He'll lay it on,740.1438 for though we be justices, and doctors,740.2439 and churchmen, yet we are740.3440 the sons of women, Master Page.
True, Master Shallow.
It will be found so, Master Page.
Master Page, I have seen the day that young757447 tall fellows with their stroke and their passado757.1448 I have made them trudge, Master Page.755449 Ah, 'tis the heart, the heart doth all! I450 have seen the day, with my two-hand sword,451 I would 'a' made you four tall fencers452 skipped like rats.
Here, boys, shall we wag, shall we wag?
Ha' with you, mine host.
Exeunt Host and Shallow.
No, in good sadness. not in mine.765459 [Aside] Yet for all this, I'll try it further.765.1460 I will not leave it so.765.2461 [To Page] Come, Master Page, shall we to dinner?
With all my heart, sir. I'll follow you.