Bardolph, brew me a pottle o' sack presently.

With eggs, sir?

Simply of itself. I'll none of these pullets' sperm954 in my drink. Go, make haste.

1683955 Have I lived to be carried in a basket1684956 and thrown into the Thames like a barrow of957 butcher's offal? Well, an I be served such another1685958 trick, I'll give them leave to take out my brains1686959 and butter them, and give them to a dog for a1687960 New Year's gift. 'Sblood, the rogues slided me in with as1688961 little remorse as if they had gone to drown a blind1689962 bitch's puppies in the litter: and they might know1690963 by my size I have a kind of alacrity in sinking. An1691964 the bottom had been as deep as hell I should down.1692965 I had been drowned, but that the shore was shelvy966 and somewhat shallow: a death that I abhor!1693967 For you know the water swells a man, and what a1694968 thing should I have been when I had been swelled?1694.1969 By the Lord, a mountain of mummy! --

Now, is the1694.2970 sack brewed?

Ay, sir. [Bardolph serves him.] There's a woman below would speak972 with you.

11.6 Bid her come up.

Let me put some sack974 among this cold water, for my belly is as cold as if I1699975 had swallowed snowballs for pills.1699.1976

1708977 Now, what's the news with you?

I come from Mistress Ford, forsooth.

Mistress Ford? I have had Ford enough!980 I have been thrown into the Ford, my belly is full1711981 of Ford -- she hath tickled me.

Oh, lord, sir, she is the sorrowfullest woman1713983 that her servants mistook that ever lived. And, sir,1718984 she would desire you of all loves you will meet her985 once again, tomorrow, sir, between ten and1720986 eleven, and she hopes to make amends for all.

Ten and eleven, sayest thou?

Ay, forsooth.

Well, tell her I'll meet her. Let her but think1727.1990 of man's frailty. Let her judge what man is,1727.2991 and then think of me. And so farewell.

You'll not fail, sir?

I will not fail. Commend me to her.

1729995 I wonder I hear not of Master Brook. I like his1730996 money well. By the mass, here he is!

God save you, sir.

Welcome, good Master Brook. You come to17341000 know how matters goes.

Thats my coming indeed, Sir John.

Master Brook, I will not lie to you, sir.17371003 I was there at my appointed time.

And how sped you, sir?

Very ill-favoredly, sir.

Why, sir, did she change her determination?

No, Master Brook, but you shall hear. After we17431008 had kissed and embraced, and, as it were, even amid17441009 the prologue of our encounter, who should come1010 but the jealous knave, her husband, and a rabble of17461011 his companions at his heels, thither provoked and1012 instigated by his distemper. And what to do, think17471013 you? To search for his wife's love. Even so, plainly1014 so.

While ye were there?

Whilst I was there.

And did he search and could not find you?

You shall hear, sir. As God would have it,17521019 a little before comes me one Page's wife,1020 gives her intelligence of her husband's1021 approach and, by her invention and Ford's wife's17531022 distraction, conveyed me into a buck-basket.

A buck-basket!

By the Lord, a buck-basket, rammed me in1025 with foul shirts, stockings, greasy napkins,17581026 that, Master Brook, there was a compound of the most17591027 villanous smell that ever offended nostril.17621028 I'll tell you, Master Brook, by the Lord, for your sake17741029 I suffered three egregious deaths: first, to be17771030 crammed like a good bilbo in the circomference17781031 of a pack, hilt to point, heel to head; and then to17801032 be stewed in my own grease like a Dutch dish --17811033 a man of my kidney! by the Lord, it was marvel I17831034 escaped suffocation -- and, in the heat of all this,17861035 to be thrown into Thames like a horseshoe. Hot,17881036 Master Brook! Think of that hissing heat, Master17891037 Brook!

Well, sir, then my suit is void?1039 You'll undertake it no more?

Master Brook, I'll be thrown into Etna17951041 as I have been in the Thames,1042 ere I thus leave her. I have received17971043 another appointment of meeting:17981044 between ten and eleven is the hour.

Why, sir, 'tis almost ten already.

11.33 Is it? Why, then will I address myself1047 for my appointment. Master Brook, come to me soon18021048 at night, and you shall know how I speed.18031049 And the end shall be, you shall enjoy her love.18041050 You shall cuckold Ford. Come to me soon1804.11051 at night.

Is this a dream? Is it a vision?18081053 Master Ford, Master Ford, awake, Master Ford!18091054 There is a hole made in your best coat, Master Ford,1809.11055 and a man shall not only endure this wrong,1809.21056 but shall stand under the taunt of names.1809.31057 Lucifer is a good name; Barbason, good; good1809.41058 devils' names. But cuckold, wittol, catso?1809.51059 The devil himself hath not such a name!1809.61060 [He points to each side of his forehead.] And they may hang hats here, and napkins here1809.71061 upon my horns. Well, I'll home, I'll ferret him,18151062 and unless the devil himself should aid him,18161063 I'll search unpossible places! I'll about it,1816.11064 lest I repent too late.