22201300Host. What would thou haue boore, what thick-(skin?

22211301Speake, breath, discus, short, quick, briefe, snap.

22231302Sim. Sir, I am sent frõ my M. to sir Iohn Falstaffe.

22251303Host. Sir Iohn, theres his Castle, his standing bed,

22261304his trundle bed, his chamber is painted about with

22271305the story of the prodigall, fresh and new, go knock,

22281306heele speak like an Antripophiginian to thee:

22291307Knock I say.

22301308Sim. Sir I should speak with an old woman that

1309went vp into his chamber.

22331310Host. An old woman, the knight may be robbed,

22341311Ile call bully knight, bully sir Iohn. Speake from thy

22351312Lungs military: it is thine host, thy Ephesian calls.

22371313Fal. Now mine Host.

22381314Host. Here is a Bohemian tarter bully, tarries the

1315comming downe of the fat woman: Let her descēd

22401316bully, let her descend, my chambers are honorable,

1317pah priuasie, fie.

22421318Fal. Indeed mine host there was afat woman with(me,

22431319But she is gone.

22441321Sim. Pray sir was it not the wise woman of Brain-

22451322 ford?

22461323Fal. Marry was it Musselshell, what would you?

22481324Sim. Marry sir my maister Slender sent me to her,

22491325To know whether one Nim that hath his chaine,

1326Cousoned him of it, or no.

22521327Fal. I talked with the woman about it.

22531328Sim. And I pray sir what ses she?

22541329Fal. Marry she ses the very same man that

22551330Beguiled maister Slender of his chaine,

1331Cousoned him of it.

22701332Sim. May I be bolde to tell my maister so sir?

22711333Fal. I tike, who more bolde.

22721334Sim. I thanke you sir, I shall make my maister a

22731335glad man at these tydings, God be with you sir.

22741336Host. Thou art clarkly sir Iohn, thou art clarkly,

22751337Was there a wise woman with thee?

22761338Fal. Marry was there mine host, one that taught

22771339Me more wit then I learned this 7. yeare,

22781340And I paid nothing for it,

1341But was paid for my learning.

22801343Bar. O Lord sir cousonage, plaine cousonage.

22811344Host. Why man, where be my horses? where be

2281.11345the Germanes?

22831346Bar. Rid away with your horses:

22841347After I came beyond Maidenhead,

1348They flung me in a slow of myre, & away they ran.

22991350Doc. Where be my Host de gartyre?

23001351Host. O here sir in perplexitie.

23021352Doc. I cannot tell vad be dad,

1353But begar I will tell you van ting,

23031354Dear be a Garmaine Duke come to de Court,

2303.11355Has cosened all de host of Branford,

2203.21356And Redding: begar I tell you for good will,

2303.31357Ha, ha, mine Host, am I euen met you? Exit.

22901359Sir Hu. Where is mine Host of the gartyr?

22921360Now my Host, I would desire you looke you now,

2292.11361To haue a care of your entertainments,

22931362For there is three sorts of cosen garmombles,

22941363Is cosen all the Host of Maidenhead & Readings,

22951364 Now you are an honest man, and a scuruy beg-

2295.11365 gerly lowsie knaue beside:

2295.21366And can point wrong places,

2295.31367I tell you for good will, grate why mine Host. Exit,

23061368Host. I am cosened Hugh, and coy Bardolfe,

1369Sweet knight assist me, I am cosened. Exit.

23091370Fal. Would all the worell were cosened for me,

23101371For I am cousoned and beaten too.

23161372Well, I neuer prospered since I forswore

23171373My selfe at Primero: and my winde

1374Were but long inough to say my prayers,

23181375Ide repent, now from whence come you?

23201377Quic. From the two parties forsooth.

23211378Fal. The diuell take the one partie,

1379And his dam the other,

23221380And theyle be both bestowed.

1381I haue endured more for their sakes,

23231382Then man is able to endure.

23251383Quic. O Lord sir, they are the sorowfulst creatures

23261384That euer liued: specially mistresse Ford,

1385Her husband hath beaten her that she is all

23271386Blacke and blew poore soule.

23291387Fal. What tellest me of blacke and blew,

1388 I haue bene beaten all the colours in the Rainbow,

23311389And in my escape like to a bene apprehended

1390For a witch of Brainford, and set in the stockes.

23361391Quic. Well sir, she is a sorrowfull woman,

23371392And I hope when you heare my errant,

1393Youle be perswaded to the contrarie.

23421394Fal. Come goe with me into my chamber, Ile

1395 heare thee. Exit omnes.