2221Host. What wouldst thou haue? (Boore) what? (thick

2222skin) speake, breathe, discusse: breefe, short, quicke,

2223snap.

2224Simp. Marry Sir, I come to speake with Sir Iohn Fal-

2225staffe from M. Slender.

2226Host. There's his Chamber, his House, his Castle,

2227his standing-bed and truckle-bed: 'tis painted about

2228with the story of the Prodigall, fresh and new: go, knock

2229and call: hee'l speake like an Anthropophaginian vnto

2230thee: Knocke I say.

2231Simp. There's an olde woman, a fat woman gone vp

2232into his chamber: Ile be so bold as stay Sir till she come

2233downe: I come to speake with her indeed.

2234Host. Ha? A fat woman? The Knight may be robb'd:

2235Ile call. Bully-Knight, Bully Sir Iohn: speake from thy

2236Lungs Military: Art thou there? It is thine Host, thine

2237Ephesian cals.

2238Fal. How now, mine Host?

2239Host. Here's a Bohemian-Tartar taries the comming

2240downe of thy fat-woman: Let her descend (Bully) let

2241her descend: my Chambers are honourable: Fie, priua-

2242cy? Fie.

2243Fal. There was (mine Host) an old-fat-woman euen

2244now with me, but she's gone.

2245Simp. Pray you Sir, was't not the Wise-woman of

2246Brainford?

2247Fal. I marry was it (Mussel-shell) what would you

2248with her?

2249Simp. My Master (Sir) my master Slender, sent to her

2250seeing her go thorough the streets, to know (Sir) whe-

2251ther one Nim (Sir) that beguil'd him of a chaine, had the

2252chaine, or no.

2253Fal. I spake with the old woman about it.

2254Sim. And what sayes she, I pray Sir?

2255Fal. Marry shee sayes, that the very same man that

2256beguil'd Master Slender of his Chaine, cozon'd him of it.

2257Simp. I would I could haue spoken with the Woman

2258her selfe, I had other things to haue spoken with her

2259too, from him.

2260Fal. What are they? let vs know.

2261Host. I: come: quicke.

2262Fal. I may not conceale them (Sir.)

2263Host. Conceale them, or thou di'st.

2264Sim. Why sir, they were nothing but about Mistris

2265Anne Page, to know if it were my Masters fortune to

2266haue her, or no.

2267Fal. 'Tis, 'tis his fortune.

2268Sim. What Sir?

2269Fal. To haue her, or no: goe; say the woman told

2270me so.

2271Sim. May I be bold to say so Sir?

2272Fal. I Sir: like who more bold.

2273Sim. I thanke your worship: I shall make my Master

2274glad with these tydings.

2275Host. Thou are clearkly: thou art clearkly (Sir Iohn)

2276was there a wise woman with thee?

2277Fal. I that there was (mine Host) one that hath taught

2278me more wit, then euer I learn'd before in my life: and

2279I paid nothing for it neither, but was paid for my lear-

2280ning.

2281Bar. Out alas (Sir) cozonage: meere cozonage.

2282Host. Where be my horses? speake well of them var-

2283letto.

2284Bar. Run away with the cozoners: for so soone as

2285I came beyond Eaton, they threw me off, from behinde

2286one of them, in a slough of myre; and set spurres, and

2287away; like three Germane-diuels; three Doctor Fau-

2288stasses.

2289Host. They are gone but to meete the Duke (villaine)

2290doe not say they be fled: Germanes are honest men.

2291Euan. Where is mine Host?

2292Host. What is the matter Sir?

2293Euan. Haue a care of your entertainments: there is a

2294friend of mine come to Towne, tels mee there is three

2295Cozen-Iermans, that has cozend all the Hosts of Readins,

2296of Maidenhead; of Cole-brooke, of horses and money: I

2297tell you for good will (looke you) you are wise, and full

2298of gibes, and vlouting-stocks: and 'tis not conuenient

2299you should be cozoned. Fare you well.

2300Cai. Ver' is mine Host de Iarteere?

2301Host. Here (Master Doctor) in perplexitie, and doubt-

2302full delemma.

2303Cai. I cannot tell vat is dat: but it is tell-a-me, dat

2304you make grand preparation for a Duke de Iamanie: by

2305my trot: der is no Duke that the Court is know, to

2306come: I tell you for good will: adieu.

2307Host. Huy and cry, (villaine) goe: assist me Knight, I

2308am vndone: fly, run: huy, and cry (villaine) I am vn-

2309done.

2310Fal. I would all the world might be cozond, for I

2311haue beene cozond and beaten too: if it should come

2312to the eare of the Court, how I haue beene transformed;

2313and how my transformation hath beene washd, and

2314cudgeld, they would melt mee out of my fat drop by

2315drop, and liquor Fishermens-boots with me: I warrant

2316they would whip me with their fine wits, till I were as

2317crest-falne as a dride-peare: I neuer prosper'd, since I

2318forswore my selfe at Primero: well, if my winde were

2319but long enough; I would repent: Now? Whence come

2320you?

2321Qui. From the two parties forsooth.

2322Fal. The Diuell take one partie, and his Dam the

2323other: and so they shall be both bestowed; I haue suf-

2324fer'd more for their sakes; more then the villanous in-

2325constancy of mans disposition is able to beare.

2326Qui. And haue not they suffer'd? Yes, I warrant; spe-

2327ciously one of them; Mistris Ford (good heart) is beaten

2328blacke and blew, that you cannot see a white spot about

2329her.

2330Fal. What tell'st thou mee of blacke, and blew? I

2331was beaten my selfe into all the colours of the Raine-

2332bow: and I was like to be apprehended for the Witch

2333of Braineford, but that my admirable dexteritie of wit,

2334my counterfeiting the action of an old woman deliuer'd

2335me, the knaue Constable had set me ith' Stocks, ith' com-

2336mon Stocks, for a Witch.

2337Qu, Sir: let me speake with you in your Chamber,

2338you shall heare how things goe, and (I warrant) to your

2339content: here is a Letter will say somewhat: (good-

2340hearts) what a-doe here is to bring you together? Sure,

2341one of you do's not serue heauen well, that you are so

2342cross'd.

2343Fal. Come vp into my Chamber. Exeunt.