343As there is no true Cuckold but calamity, so beauties a

344flower; The Lady bad take away the foole, therefore I

345say againe, take her away.

346Ol. Sir, I bad them take away you.

347Clo. Misprision in the highest degree. Lady, Cucullus

348non facit monachum: that's as much to say, as I weare not

349motley in my braine: good Madona, giue mee leaue to

350proue you a foole.

351Ol. Can you do it?

352Clo. Dexteriously, good Madona.

353Ol. Make your proofe.

354Clo. I must catechize you for it Madona, Good my

355Mouse of vertue answer mee.

356Ol. Well sir, for want of other idlenesse, Ile bide your

357proofe.

358Clo. Good Madona, why mournst thou?

359Ol. Good foole, for my brothers death.

360Clo. I thinke his soule is in hell, Madona.

361Ol. I know his soule is in heauen, foole.

362Clo. The more foole (Madona) to mourne for your

363Brothers soule, being in heauen. Take away the Foole,

364Gentlemen.

365Ol. What thinke you of this foole Maluolio, doth he

366not mend?

367Mal. Yes, and shall do, till the pangs of death shake

368him: Infirmity that decaies the wise, doth euer make the

369better foole.

370Clow. God send you sir, a speedie Infirmity, for the

371better increasing your folly: Sir Toby will be sworn that

372I am no Fox, but he wil not passe his word for two pence

373that you are no Foole.

374Ol. How say you to that Maluolio?

375Mal. I maruell your Ladyship takes delight in such

376a barren rascall: I saw him put down the other day, with

377an ordinary foole, that has no more braine then a stone.

378Looke you now, he's out of his gard already: vnles you

379laugh and minister occasion to him, he is gag'd. I protest

380I take these Wisemen, that crow so at these set kinde of

381fooles, no better then the fooles Zanies.

382Ol. O you are sicke of selfe-loue Maluolio, and taste

383with a distemper'd appetite. To be generous, guitlesse,

384and of free disposition, is to take those things for Bird-

385bolts, that you deeme Cannon bullets: There is no slan-

386der in an allow'd foole, though he do nothing but rayle;

387nor no rayling, in a knowne discreet man, though hee do

388nothing but reproue.

389Clo. Now Mercury indue thee with leasing, for thou

390speak'st well of fooles.

392Mar. Madam, there is at the gate, a young Gentle-

393man, much desires to speake with you.

394Ol. From the Count Orsino, is it?

395Ma I know not (Madam) 'tis a faire young man, and

396well attended.

397Ol. Who of my people hold him in delay:

398Ma. Sir Toby Madam, your kinsman.

399Ol. Fetch him off I pray you, he speakes nothing but

400madman: Fie on him. Go you Maluolio; If it be a suit

401from the Count, I am sicke, or not at home. What you

402will, to dismisse it. Exit Maluo.

403Now you see sir, how your fooling growes old, & peo-

404ple dislike it.

405Clo. Thou hast spoke for vs (Madona) as if thy eldest

406sonne should be a foole: whose scull, Ioue cramme with

407braines, for heere he comes. Enter Sir Toby.

408One of thy kin has a most weake Pia-mater.

409Ol. By mine honor halfe drunke. What is he at the

410gate Cosin?

411To. A Gentleman.

412Ol. A Gentleman? What Gentleman?

413To. 'Tis a Gentleman heere. A plague o'these pickle

414herring: How now Sot.

415Clo. Good Sir Toby.

416Ol. Cosin, Cosin, how haue you come so earely by

417this Lethargie?

418To. Letcherie, I defie Letchery: there's one at the

419gate.

420Ol. I marry, what is he?

421To. Let him be the diuell and he will, I care not: giue

422me faith say I. Well, it's all one. Exit

423Ol. What's a drunken man like, foole?

424Clo. Like a drown'd man, a foole, and a madde man:

425One draught aboue heate, makes him a foole, the second

426maddes him, and a third drownes him.

427Ol. Go thou and seeke the Crowner, and let him sitte

428o'my Coz: for he's in the third degree of drinke: hee's

429drown'd: go looke after him.

430Clo. He is but mad yet Madona, and the foole shall

431looke to the madman.

433Mal. Madam, yond young fellow sweares hee will

434speake with you. I told him you were sicke, he takes on

435him to vnderstand so much, and therefore comes to speak

436with you. I told him you were asleepe, he seems to haue

437a fore knowledge of that too, and therefore comes to

438speake with you. What is to be said to him Ladie, hee's

439fortified against any deniall.

440Ol. Tell him, he shall not speake with me.

441Mal. Ha's beene told so: and hee sayos hee'l stand at

442your doore like a Sheriffes post, and be the supporter to

443a bench, but hee'l speake with you.

444Ol. What kinde o'man is he?

445Mal. Why of mankinde.

446Ol. What manner of man?

447Mal. Of verie ill manner: hee'l speake with you, will

448you, or no.

449Ol. Of what personage, and yeeres is he?

450Mal. Not yet old enough for a man, nor yong enough

451for a boy: as a squash is before tis a pescod, or a Codling

452when tis almost an Apple: Tis with him in standing wa-

453ter, betweene boy and man. He is verie well-fauour'd,

454and he speakes verie shrewishly: One would thinke his

455mothers milke were scarse out of him.

456Ol. Let him approach: Call in my Gentlewoman.'

457Mal. Gentlewoman, my Lady calles. Exit.

459Ol. Giue me my vaile: come throw it ore my face,

460Wee'l once more heare Orsinos Embassie.

462Vio. The honorable Ladie of the house, which is she?

463Ol. Speake to me, I shall answer for her: your will.

464Vio. Most radiant, exquisite, and vnmatchable beau-

465tie. I pray you tell me if this bee the Lady of the house,

466for I neuer saw her. I would bee loath to cast away my

467speech: for besides that it is excellently well pend, I haue

468taken great paines to con it. Good Beauties, let mee su-

469staine no scorne; I am very comptible, euen to the least

470sinister vsage.

471Ol. Whence came you sir?

472Vio. I can say little more then I haue studied, & that

473question's out of my part. Good gentle one, giue mee

474modest assurance, if you be the Ladie of the house, that