5I Learne in this Letter, that Don Peter of Arra-

6gon, comes this night to Messina.

7Mess. He is very neere by this: he was not

8three Leagues off when I left him.

9Leon. How many Gentlemen haue you lost in this

10action?

11Mess. But few of any sort, and none of name.

12Leon. A victorie is twice it selfe, when the atchieuer

13brings home full numbers: I finde heere, that Don Pe-

14ter hath bestowed much honor on a yong Florentine, cal-

15led Claudio.

16Mess. Much deseru'd on his part, and equally remem-

17bred by Don Pedro, he hath borne himselfe beyond the

18promise of his age, doing in the figure of a Lambe, the

19feats of a Lion, he hath indeede better bettred expecta-

20tion, then you must expect of me to tell you how.

21Leo. He hath an Vnckle heere in Messina, wil be very

22much glad of it.

23Mess. I haue alreadie deliuered him letters, and there

24appeares much ioy in him, euen so much, that ioy could

25not shew it selfe modest enough, without a badg of bit-

26ternesse.

27Leo. Did he breake out into teares?

28Mess. In great measure.

29Leo. A kinde ouerflow of kindnesse, there are no fa-

30ces truer, then those that are so wash'd, how much bet-

31ter is it to weepe at ioy, then to ioy at weeping?

32Bea. I pray you, is Signior Mountanto return'd from

33the warres, or no?

34Mess. I know none of that name, Lady, there was

35none such in the armie of any sort.

36Leon. What is he that you aske for Neece?

37Hero. My cousin meanes Signior Benedick of Padua

38Mess. O he's return'd, and as pleasant as euer he was.

39Beat. He set vp his bils here in Messina, & challeng'd

40Cupid at the Flight: and my Vnckles foole reading the

41Challenge, subscrib'd for Cupid, and challeng'd him at

42the Burbolt. I pray you, how many hath hee kil'd and

43eaten in these warres? But how many hath he kil'd? for

44indeed, I promis'd to eate all of his killing.

45Leon. 'Faith Neece, you taxe Signior Benedicke too

46much, but hee'l be meet with you, I doubt it not.

47Mess. He hath done good seruice Lady in these wars.

48Beat. You had musty victuall, and he hath holpe to

49ease it: he's a very valiant Trencher-man, hee hath an

50excellent stomacke.

51Mess. And a good souldier too Lady.

52Beat. And a good souldier to a Lady. But what is he

53to a Lord?

54Mess. A Lord to a Lord, a man to a man, stuft with

55all honourable vertues.

56Beat. It is so indeed, he is no lesse then a stuft man:

57but for the stuffing well, we are all mortall.

58Leon. You must not (sir) mistake my Neece, there is

59a kind of merry war betwixt Signior Benedick, & her:

60they neuer meet, but there's a skirmish of wit between

61them.

62Bea. Alas, he gets nothing by that. In our last con-

63flict, foure of his fiue wits went halting off, and now is

64the whole man gouern'd with one: so that if hee haue

65wit enough to keepe himselfe warme, let him beare it

66for a difference betweene himselfe and his horse: For it

67is all the wealth that he hath left, to be knowne a reaso-

68nable creature. Who is his companion now? He hath

69euery month a new sworne brother.

70Mess. I'st possible?

71Beat. Very easily possible: he weares his faith but as

72the fashion of his hat, it euer changes with y^e next block.

73Mess. I see (Lady) the Gentleman is not in your

74bookes.

75Bea. No, and he were, I would burne my study. But

76I pray you, who is his companion? Is there no young

77squarer now, that will make a voyage with him to the

78diuell?

79Mess. He is most in the company of the right noble

80Claudio.

81Beat. O Lord, he will hang vpon him like a disease:

82he is sooner caught then the pestilence, and the taker

83runs presently mad. God helpe the noble Claudio, if hee

84haue caught the Benedict, it will cost him a thousand

85pound ere he be cur'd.

86Mess. I will hold friends with you Lady.

87Bea. Do good friend.

88Leo. You'l ne're run mad Neece.

89Bea. No, not till a hot Ianuary.

90Mess. Don Pedro is approach'd.

93Pedro. Good Signior Leonato, you are come to meet

94your trouble: the fashion of the world is to auoid cost,

95and you encounter it.

96Leon. Neuer came trouble to my house in the likenes

97of your Grace: for trouble being gone, comfort should

98remaine: but when you depart from me, sorrow abides,

99and happinesse takes his leaue.

102 Much adoe about Nothing.

100Pedro. You embrace your charge too willingly: I

101thinke this is your daughter.

102Leonato. Her mother hath many times told me so.

103Bened. Were you in doubt that you askt her?

104Leonato. Signior Benedicke, no, for then were you a

105childe.

106Pedro. You haue it full Benedicke, we may ghesse by

107this, what you are, being a man, truely the Lady fathers

108her selfe: be happie Lady, for you are like an honorable

109father.

110Ben. If Signior Leonato be her father, she would not

111haue his head on her shoulders for al Messina, as like him

112as she is.

113Beat. I wonder that you will still be talking, signior

114Benedicke, no body markes you.

115Ben. What my deere Ladie Disdaine! are you yet

116liuing?

117Beat. Is it possible Disdaine should die, while shee

118hath such meete foode to feede it, as Signior Benedicke?

119Curtesie it selfe must conuert to Disdaine, if you come in

120her presence.

121Bene. Then is curtesie a turne-coate, but it is cer-

122taine I am loued of all Ladies, onely you excepted: and

123I would I could finde in my heart that I had not a hard

124heart, for truely I loue none.

125Beat. A deere happinesse to women, they would else

126haue beene troubled with a pernitious Suter, I thanke

127God and my cold blood, I am of your humour for that, I

128had rather heare my Dog barke at a Crow, than a man

129sweare he loues me.

130Bene. God keepe your Ladiship still in that minde,

131so some Gentleman or other shall scape a predestinate

132scratcht face.

133Beat. Scratching could not make it worse, and 'twere

134such a face as yours were.

135Bene. Well, you are a rare Parrat teacher.

136Beat. A bird of my tongue, is better than a beast of

137your.

138Ben. I would my horse had the speed of your tongue,

139and so good a continuer, but keepe your way a Gods

140name, I haue done.

141Beat. You alwaies end with a Iades tricke, I know

142you of old.

143Pedro. This is the summe of all: Leonato, signior Clau-

144dio, and signior Benedicke; my deere friend Leonato, hath

145inuited you all, I tell him we shall stay here, at the least

146a moneth, and he heartily praies some occasion may de-

147taine vs longer: I dare sweare hee is no hypocrite, but

148praies from his heart.

149Leon. If you sweare, my Lord, you shall not be for-

150sworne, let mee bid you welcome, my Lord, being re-

151conciled to the Prince your brother: I owe you all

152duetie.

153Iohn. I thanke you, I am not of many words, but I

154thanke you.

155Leon. Please it your grace leade on?

156Pedro. Your hand Leonato, we will goe together.

158Clau. Benedicke, didst thou note the daughter of sig-

159nior Leonato?

160Bene. I noted her not, but I lookt on her.

161Claud. Is she not a modest yong Ladie?

162Bene. Doe you question me as an honest man should

163doe, for my simple true iudgement? or would you haue

164me speake after my custome, as being a professed tyrant

165to their sexe?

166Clau. No, I pray thee speake in sober iudgement.

167Bene. Why yfaith me thinks shee's too low for a hie

168praise, too browne for a faire praise, and too little for a

169great praise, onely this commendation I can affoord her,

170that were shee other then she is, she were vnhandsome,

171and being no other, but as she is, I doe not like her.

172Clau. Thou think'st I am in sport, I pray thee tell me

173truely how thou lik'st her.

174Bene. Would you buie her, that you enquier after

175her?

176Clau. Can the world buie such a iewell?

177Ben. Yea, and a case to put it into, but speake you this

178with a sad brow? Or doe you play the flowting iacke, to

179tell vs Cupid is a good Hare-finder, and Vulcan a rare

180Carpenter: Come, in what key shall a man take you to

181goe in the song?

182Clau. In mine eie, she is the sweetest Ladie that euer

183I lookt on.

184Bene. I can see yet without spectacles, and I see no

185such matter: there's her cosin, and she were not possest

186with a furie, exceedes her as much in beautie, as the first

187of Maie doth the last of December: but I hope you haue

188no intent to turne husband, haue you?

189Clau. I would scarce trust my selfe, though I had

190sworne the contrarie, if Hero would be my wife.

191Bene. Ist come to this? in faith hath not the world one

192man but he will weare his cap with suspition? shall I ne-

193uer see a batcheller of three score againe? goe to yfaith,

194and thou wilt needes thrust thy necke into a yoke, weare

195the print of it, and sigh away sundaies: looke, don Pedro

196is returned to seeke you.

198Pedr. What secret hath held you here, that you fol-

199lowed not to Leonatoes?

200Bened. I would your Grace would constraine mee to

201tell.

202Pedro. I charge thee on thy allegeance.

203Ben. You heare, Count Claudio, I can be secret as a

204dumbe man, I would haue you thinke so (but on my al-

205legiance, marke you this, on my allegiance) hee is in

206loue, With who? now that is your Graces part: marke

207how short his answere is, with Hero, Leonatoes short

208daughter.

209Clau. If this were so, so were it vttred.

210Bened. Like the old tale, my Lord, it is not so, nor 'twas

211not so: but indeede, God forbid it should be so.

212Clau. If my passion change not shortly, God forbid it

213should be otherwise.

214Pedro. Amen, if you loue her, for the Ladie is verie

215well worthie.

216Clau. You speake this to fetch me in, my Lord.

217Pedr. By my troth I speake my thought.

218Clau. And in faith, my Lord, I spoke mine.

219Bened. And by my two faiths and troths, my Lord, I

220speake mine.

221Clau. That I loue her, I feele.

222Pedr. That she is worthie, I know.

223Bened. That I neither feele how shee should be lo-

224ued, nor know how shee should be worthie, is the

225opinion that fire cannot melt out of me, I will die in it at

226the stake.

227Pedr. Thou wast euer an obstinate heretique in the de-

228spight of Beautie.

229Clau. And neuer could maintaine his part, but in the

230force of his will.

Much adoe about Nothing. 103

231Ben. That a woman conceiued me, I thanke her: that

232she brought mee vp, I likewise giue her most humble

233thankes: but that I will haue a rechate winded in my

234forehead, or hang my bugle in an inuisible baldricke, all

235women shall pardon me: because I will not do them the

236wrong to mistrust any, I will doe my selfe the right to

237trust none: and the fine is, (for the which I may goe the

238finer) I will liue a Batchellor.

239Pedro. I shall see thee ere I die, looke pale with loue.

240Bene. With anger, with sicknesse, or with hunger,

241my Lord, not with loue: proue that euer I loose more

242blood with loue, then I will get againe with drinking,

243picke out mine eyes with a Ballet-makers pe

nne, and

244hang me vp at the doore of a brothel-house for the signe

245of blinde Cupid.

246Pedro. Well, if euer thou doost fall from this faith,

247thou wilt proue a notable argument.

248Bene. If I do, hang me in a bottle like a Cat, & shoot

249at me, and he that hit's me, let him be clapt on the shoul-

250der, and cal'd Adam.

251Pedro. Well, as time shall trie: In time the sauage

252Bull doth beare tne yoake.

253Bene. The sauage bull may, but if euer the sensible

254Benedicke beare it, plucke off the bulles hornes, and set

255them in my forehead, and let me be vildely painted, and

256in such great Letters as they write, heere is good horse

257to hire: let them signifie vnder my signe, here you may

258see Benedicke the married man.

259Clau. If this should euer happen, thou wouldst bee

260horne mad.

261Pedro. Nay, if Cupid haue not spent all his Quiuer in

262Venice, thou wilt quake for this shortly.

263Bene. I looke for an earthquake too then.

264Pedro. Well, you will temporize with the houres, in

265the meane time, good Signior Benedicke, repaire to Leo-

266natoes, commend me to him, and tell him I will not faile

267him at supper, for indeede he hath made great prepara-

268tion.

269Bene. I haue almost matter enough in me for such an

270Embassage, and so I commit you.

271Clau. To the tuition of God. From my house, if I

272had it.

273Pedro. The sixt of Iuly. Your louing friend, Benedick.

274Bene. Nay mocke not, mocke not; the body of your

275discourse is sometime guarded with fragments, and the

276guardes are but slightly basted on neither, ere you flout

277old ends any further, examine your conscience, and so I

278leaue you. Exit.

279Clau. My Liege, your Highnesse now may doe mee

280good.

281Pedro. My loue is thine to teach, teach it but how,

282And thou shalt see how apt it is to learne

283Any hard Lesson that may do thee good.

284Clau. Hath Leonato any sonne my Lord?

285Pedro. No childe but Hero, she's his onely heire.

286Dost thou affect her Claudio?

287Clau. O my Lord,

288When you went onward on this ended action,

289I look'd vpon her with a souldiers eie,

290That lik'd, but had a rougher taske in hand,

291Than to driue liking to the name of loue:

292But now I am return'd, and that warre-thoughts

293Haue left their places vacant: in their roomes,

294Come thronging soft and delicate desires,

295All prompting mee how faire yong Hero is,

296Saying I lik'd her ere I went to warres.

297Pedro. Thou wilt be like a louer presently,

298And tire the hearer with a booke of words:

299If thou dost loue faire Hero, cherish it,

300And I will breake with her: wast not to this end,

301That thou beganst to twist so fine a story?

302Clau. How sweetly doe you minister to loue,

303That know loues griefe by his complexion!

304But lest my liking might too sodaine seeme,

305I would haue salu'd it with a longer treatise.

306Ped. What need y^e bridge much broder then the flood?

307The fairest graunt is the necessitie:

308Looke what will serue, is fit: 'tis once, thou louest,

309And I will fit thee with the remedie,

310I know we shall haue reuelling to night,

311I will assume thy part in some disguise,

312And tell faire Hero I am Claudio,

313And in her bosome Ile vnclaspe my heart,

314And take her hearing prisoner with the force

315And strong incounter of my amorous tale:

316Then after, to her father will I breake,

317And the conclusion is, shee shall be thine,

318In practise let vs put it presently. Exeunt.