I prithee, pretty youth, let me be better acquainted 1918with thee.

They say you are a melancholy fellow.

I am so. I do love it better than laughing.

Those that are in extremity of either are abominable 1922fellows, and betray themselves to every modern 1923censure worse than drunkards.

Why, 'tis good to be sad and say nothing.

Why then, 'tis good to be a post.

I have neither the scholar's melancholy, which 1927is emulation, nor the musician's, which is fantastical, 1928nor the courtier's, which is proud, nor the soldier's, 1929which is ambitious, nor the lawyer's, which is politic, 1930nor the lady's, which is nice, nor the lover's, which 1931is all these; but it is a melancholy of mine own, compounded 1932of many simples, extracted from many objects, 1933and indeed the sundry contemplation of my travels, in 1934which my often rumination wraps me in a most humorous 1935sadness.

A traveler! By my faith, you have great reason 1937to be sad. I fear you have sold your own lands 1938to see other men's. Then to have seen much and to have 1939nothing is to have rich eyes and poor hands.

Yes, I have gained my experience.

And your experience makes you sad. I had rather 1943have a fool to make me merry than experience to 1944make me sad -- and to travel for it too!

Good day, and happiness, dear Rosalind!

Nay, then, God b'wi' you, an you talk in blank 1947verse.

Farewell, Monsieur Traveler. Look you lisp 1949and wear strange suits, disable all the benefits 1950of your own country, be out of love with 1951your nativity, and almost chide God for making you that 1952countenance you are, or I will scarce think you have 1953swam in a gondola.

Why, how now, Orlando, where 1954have you been all this while? You a lover? An you 1955serve me such another trick, never come in my sight 1956more.

My fair Rosalind, I come within an hour of my 1958promise.

Break an hour's promise in love? He that 1960will divide a minute into a thousand parts and break 1961but a part of the thousand part of a minute in the affairs 1962of love, it may be said of him that Cupid hath clapped 1963him o'th' shoulder, but I'll warrant him heart-whole.

Pardon me, dear Rosalind.

Nay, an you be so tardy, come no more in my 1966sight. I had as lief be wooed of a snail.

Of a snail?

Ay, of a snail; for though he comes slowly, he 1969carries his house on his head -- a better jointure, I think, 1970than you make a woman. Besides, he brings his destiny 1971with him.

What's that?

Why, horns, which such as you are fain to be beholding 1974to your wives for. But he comes armed in his fortune, 1975and prevents the slander of his wife.

Virtue is no horn-maker; and my Rosalind is 1977virtuous.

And I am your Rosalind.

It pleases him to call you so; but he hath a Rosalind 1980 of a better leer than you.

Come, woo me, woo me, for now I am in a 1982holiday humor, and like enough to consent. What 1983would you say to me now, an I were your very very 1984Rosalind?

I would kiss before I spoke.

Nay, you were better speak first, and when you 1987were graveled for lack of matter, you might take occasion 1988to kiss. Very good orators, when they are out, 1989they will spit; and for lovers lacking -- God warn us! -- 1990matter, the cleanliest shift is to kiss.

How if the kiss be denied?

Then she puts you to entreaty, and there begins 1993new matter.

Who could be out, being before his beloved 1995mistress?

Marry, that should you, if I were your mistress, 1997or I should think my honesty ranker than my wit.

What, of my suit?

Not out of your apparel, and yet out of your 2000suit. 2001Am not I your Rosalind?

I take some joy to say you are, because I would 2003be talking of her.

Well, in her person, I say I will not have you.

Then, in mine own person, I die.

No, faith, die by attorney. The poor world is 2007almost six thousand years old, and in all this time there 2008was not any man died in his own person, videlicet, in 2009a love-cause. Troilus had his brains dashed out with a 2010Grecian club, yet he did what he could to die before, 2011and he is one of the patterns of love. Leander, he would 2012have lived many a fair year though Hero had turned 2013nun, if it had not been for a hot midsummer night; for, 2014good youth, he went but forth to wash him in the Hellespont, 2015and, being taken with the cramp, was drowned; 2016and the foolish chroniclers of that age found it was -- 2017Hero of Sestos. But these are all lies. Men have died 2018from time to time, and worms have eaten them, but not 2019for love.

I would not have my right Rosalind of this mind, 2021for, I protest, her frown might kill me.

By this hand, it will not kill a fly. But come, 2023now I will be your Rosalind in a more coming-on disposition; 2024and ask me what you will, I will grant it.

Then love me, Rosalind.

Yes, faith, will I, Fridays and Saturdays and all.

And wilt thou have me?

Ay, and twenty such.

What sayest thou?

Are you not good?

I hope so.

Why then, can one desire too much of a 2033good thing? -- Come, sister, you shall be the priest, 2034and marry us. -- Give me your hand, Orlando. -- What do you 2035say, sister?

Pray thee, marry us.

I cannot say the words.

You must begin "Will you, Orlando --"

Go to. -- Will you, Orlando, have to wife this 2040Rosalind?

I will.

Ay, but when?

Why, now, as fast as she can marry us.

Then you must say, "I take thee, Rosalind, for 2045wife."

I take thee, Rosalind, for wife.

I might ask you for your commission; 2048but I do take thee, Orlando, for my husband. There's a 2049girl goes before the priest; and, certainly, a woman's 2050thought runs before her actions.

So do all thoughts; they are winged.

Now tell me how long you would have her, after 2053you have possessed her.

For ever and a day.

Say "a day" without the "ever." No, no, Orlando, men 2056are April when they woo, December when they wed; 2057maids are May when they are maids, but the sky changes 2058when they are wives. I will be more jealous of 2059thee than a Barbary cock-pigeon over his hen, more clamorous 2060than a parrot against rain, more newfangled 2061than an ape, more giddy in my desires than a monkey. 2062I will weep for nothing, like Diana in the fountain, 2063and I will do that when you are disposed to be merry; 2064I will laugh like a hyena, and that when thou art inclined 2065to sleep.

But will my Rosalind do so?

By my life, she will do as I do.

Oh, but she is wise.

Or else she could not have the wit to do this. 2070The wiser, the waywarder. Make the doors upon a woman's 2071wit, and it will out at the casement; shut that, and 2072'twill out at the key-hole; stop that, 'twill fly with the 2073smoke out at the chimney.

A man that had a wife with such a wit, he might 2075say, "Wit, whither wilt?'"

Nay, you might keep that check for it till you 2077met your wife's wit going to your neighbor's bed.

And what wit could wit have to excuse that?

Marry, to say she came to seek you there. You 2080shall never take her without her answer, unless you take her2081 without her tongue. Oh, that woman that cannot 2082make her fault her husband's occasion, let her never nurse 2083her child herself, for she will breed it like a fool!

For these two hours, Rosalind, I will leave thee.

Alas, dear love, I cannot lack thee two hours!

I must attend the Duke at dinner. By two o'clock 2087I will be with thee again.

Ay, go your ways, go your ways. I knew what 2089you would prove; my friends told me as much, and I 2090thought no less. That flattering tongue of yours won 2091me. 'Tis but one cast away, and so, come death! Two o'clock 2092is your hour?

Ay, sweet Rosalind.

By my troth, and in good earnest, and 2095so God mend me, and by all pretty oaths that are not dangerous, 2096if you break one jot of your promise, or come one 2097minute behind your hour, I will think you the most 2098pathetical break-promise, and the most hollow lover, 2099and the most unworthy of her you call Rosalind, that 2100may be chosen out of the gross band of the unfaithful. 2101Therefore beware my censure, and keep your 2102promise.

With no less religion than if thou wert indeed 2104my Rosalind. So, adieu.

Well, Time is the old justice that examines all 2106such offenders, and let Time try. Adieu.

You have simply misused our sex in your love-prate. 2108We must have your doublet and hose plucked over 2109your head, and show the world what the bird hath done 2110to her own nest.

Oh, coz, coz, coz, my pretty little coz, that thou 2112didst know how many fathom deep I am in love! But 2113it cannot be sounded; my affection hath an unknown 2114bottom, like the Bay of Portugal.

Or rather, bottomless, that as fast as you pour 2116affection in, it runs out.

No, that same wicked bastard of Venus, that was 2118begot of thought, conceived of spleen, and born of 2119madness, that blind rascally boy that abuses everyone's 2120eyes because his own are out, let him be judge 2121how deep I am in love. I'll tell thee, Aliena, I cannot be 2122out of the sight of Orlando. I'll go find a shadow, and 2123sigh till he come.

And I'll sleep.