Internet Shakespeare Editions

Author: William Shakespeare
Editor: Rosemary Gaby
Not Peer Reviewed

Henry IV, Part 2 (Quarto 1, 1600)

The second part of
Iohn Men of al sorts take a pride to gird at me: the braine
of this foolish compoũded clay-man is not able to inuent any
thing that intends to laughter, more then I inuent, or is inuẽted
on me, I am not only witty in my selfe, but the cause that wit is
285in other men. I do here walk before thee, like a sow that hath
ouerwhelmd al her litter but one, if the prince put thee into my
seruice for any other reason then to sett me off, why then I
haue no iudgement thou horeson mandrake, thou art fitter to
290be worne in my cap, then to wait at my heels I was neuer man-
ned with an agot till now, but I wil in-set you, neither in golde
nor siluer, but in vile apparell, and send you backe againe to
your master for a iewell, the iuuenall the prince your master,
whose chin is not yet fledge, I will sooner haue a beard grow
295in the palme of my hand, then he shal get one off his cheek, &
yet he will not sticke to say his face is a face royal, God may fi-
nish it when he will, tis not a haire amisse yet, he may keepe it
still at a face royall, for a barber shall neuer earne sixpence out
300of it, and yet heele be crowing as if he had writte man euer
since his father was a batcheler, he may keepe his owne grace,
but hees almost out of mine I can assure him: what said master
Dommelton about the sattin for my short cloake and my
sloppes?
305Boy He saide sir, you should procure him better assurance
then Bardolfe, he would not take his band and yours, he liked
not the securitie.
sir Iohn Let him be damn'd like the glutton, pray God his
tongue be hotter, a horeson Achitophel! a rascall: yea forsooth
310knaue, to beare a gentle man in hand, and then stand vpon se-
curity, the horson smoothy-pates doe now weare nothing but
hie shooes and bunches of keyes at their girdles, and if a man is
through with them in honest taking vp, then they must stand
vppon security, I had as liue they would put ratsbane in my
315mouth as offer to stop it with security, I lookt a should haue
sent me two and twenty yards of sattin (as I am a true knight,)
and he sends me security: well he may sleepe in security, for he
hath the horne of aboundance, and the lightnesse of his wife
shines