1109that backing of your friends? a plague vpon such bac-

1110king: giue me them that will face me. Giue me a Cup

1111of Sack, I am a Rogue if I drunke to day.

1112Prin. O Villaine, thy Lippes are scarce wip'd, since

1113thou drunk'st last.

1114Falst. All's one for that. He drinkes.

1115A plague of all Cowards still, say I.

1116Prince. What's the matter?

1117Falst. What's the matter? here be foure of vs, haue

1118ta'ne a thousand pound this Morning.

1119Prince. Where is it, Iack? where is it?

1120Falst. Where is it? taken from vs, it is: a hundred

1121vpon poore foure of vs.

1122Prince. What, a hundred, man?

1123Falst. I am a Rogue, if I were not at halfe Sword with

1124a dozen of them two houres together. I haue scaped by

1125miracle. I am eight times thrust through the Doublet,

1126foure through the Hose, my Buckler cut through and

1127through, my Sword hackt like a Hand-saw, ecce signum.

1128I neuer dealt better since I was a man: all would not doe.

1129A plague of all Cowards: let them speake; if they speake

1130more or lesse then truth, they are villaines, and the sonnes

1131of darknesse.

1132Prince. Speake sirs, how was it?

1133Gad. We foure set vpon some dozen.

1134Falst. Sixteene, at least, my Lord.

1135Gad. And bound them.

1136Peto. No, no, they were not bound.

1137Falst. You Rogue, they were bound, euery man of

1138them, or I am a Iew else, an Ebrew Iew.

1139Gad. As we were sharing, some sixe or seuen fresh men

1140set vpon vs.

1141Falst. And vnbound the rest, and then come in the

1142other.

1143Prince. What, fought yee with them all?

1144Falst. All? I know not what yee call all: but if I

1145fought not with fiftie of them, I am a bunch of Radish:

1146if there were not two or three and fiftie vpon poore olde

1147Iack, then am I no two-legg'd Creature.

1148Poin. Pray Heauen, you haue not murthered some of

1149them.

1150Falst. Nay, that's past praying for, I haue pepper'd

1151two of them: Two I am sure I haue payed, two Rogues

1152in Buckrom Sutes. I tell thee what, Hal, if I tell thee a

1153Lye, spit in my face, call me Horse: thou knowest my olde

1154word: here I lay, and thus I bore my point; foure Rogues

1155in Buckrom let driue at me.

1156Prince. What, foure? thou sayd'st but two, euen now.

1157Falst. Foure Hal, I told thee foure.

1158Poin. I, I, he said foure.

1159Falst. These foure came all a-front, and mainely thrust

1160at me; I made no more adoe, but tooke all their seuen

1161points in my Targuet, thus.

1162Prince. Seuen? why there were but foure, euen now.

1163Falst. In Buckrom.

1164Poin. I, foure, in Buckrom Sutes.

1165Falst. Seuen, by these Hilts, or I am a Villaine else.

1166Prin. Prethee let him alone, we shall haue more anon.

1167Falst. Doest thou heare me, Hal?

1168Prin. I, and marke thee too, Iack.

1169Falst. Doe so, for it is worth the listning too: these

1170nine in Buckrom, that I told thee of.

1171Prin. So, two more alreadie.

1172Falst. Their Points being broken.

1173Poin. Downe fell his Hose.

1174Falst. Began to giue me ground: but I followed me

1175close, came in foot and hand; and with a thought, seuen of

1176the eleuen I pay'd.

1177Prin. O monstrous! eleuen Buckrom men growne

1178out of two?

1179Falst. But as the Deuill would haue it, three mis-be-

1180gotten Knaues, in Kendall Greene, came at my Back, and

1181let driue at me; for it was so darke, Hal, that thou could'st

1182not see thy Hand.

1183Prin. These Lyes are like the Father that begets them,

1184grosse as a Mountaine, open, palpable. Why thou Clay-

1185brayn'd Guts, thou Knotty-pated Foole, thou Horson ob-

1186scene greasie Tallow Catch.

1187Falst. What, art thou mad? art thou mad? is not the

1188truth, the truth?

1189Prin. Why, how could'st thou know these men in

1190Kendall Greene, when it was so darke, thou could'st not

1191see thy Hand? Come, tell vs your reason: what say'st thou

1192to this?

1193Poin. Come, your reason Iack, your reason.

1194Falst. What, vpon compulsion? No: were I at the

1195Strappado, or all the Racks in the World, I would not

1196tell you on compulsion. Giue you a reason on compulsi-

1197on? If Reasons were as plentie as Black-berries, I would

1198giue no man a Reason vpon compulsion, I.

1199Prin. Ile be no longer guiltie of this sinne. This san-

1200guine Coward, this Bed-presser, this Hors-back-breaker,

1201this huge Hill of Flesh.

1202Falst. Away you Starueling, you Elfe-skin, you dried

1203Neats tongue, Bulles-pissell, you stocke-fish: O for breth

1204to vtter. What is like thee? You Tailors yard, you sheath

1205you Bow-case, you vile standing tucke.

1206Prin. Well, breath a-while, and then to't againe: and

1207when thou hast tyr'd thy selfe in base comparisons, heare

1208me speake but thus.

1209Poin. Marke Iacke.

1210Prin. We two, saw you foure set on foure and bound

1211them, and were Masters of their Wealth: mark now how

1212a plaine Tale shall put you downe. Then did we two, set

1213on you foure, and with a word, outfac'd you from your

1214prize, and haue it: yea, and can shew it you in the House.

1215And Falstaffe, you caried your Guts away as nimbly, with

1216as quicke dexteritie, and roared for mercy, and still ranne

1217and roar'd, as euer I heard Bull-Calfe. What a Slaue art

1218thou, to hacke thy sword as thou hast done, and then say

1219it was in fight. What trick? what deuice? what starting

1220hole canst thou now find out, to hide thee from this open

1221and apparant shame?

1222Poines. Come, let's heare Iacke: What tricke hast

1223thou now?

1224Fal. I knew ye as well as he that made ye. Why heare

1225ye my Masters, was it for me to kill the Heire apparant?

1226Should I turne vpon the true Prince? Why, thou knowest

1227I am as valiant as Hercules: but beware Instinct, the Lion

1228will not touch the true Prince: Instinct is a great matter.

1229I was a Coward on Instinct: I shall thinke the better of

1230my selfe, and thee, during my life: I, for a valiant Lion,

1231and thou for a true Prince. But Lads, I am glad you haue

1232the Mony. Hostesse, clap to the doores: watch to night,

1233pray to morrow. Gallants, Lads, Boyes, Harts of Gold,

1234all the good Titles of Fellowship come to you. What,

1235shall we be merry? shall we haue a Play extempory.

1236Prin. Content, and the argument shall be, thy runing

1237away.

1238Fal. A, no more of that Hall, and thou louest me.

1240Host. My Lord, the Prince?