155
Enter Cressid and her man.
Cre. Who were those went by?
Man. Queene Hecuba, and Hellen.
Cre. And whether go they?
Man. Vp to the Easterne Tower,
160Whose height commands as subiect all the vaile,
To see the battell: Hector whose pacience,
Is as a Vertue fixt, to day was mou'd:
He chides Andromache and strooke his Armorer,
And like as there were husbandry in Warre
165Before the Sunne rose, hee was harnest lyte,
And to the field goe's he; where euery flower
Did as a Prophet weepe what it forsaw,
In Hectors wrath.
Cre. What was his cause of anger?
170Man. The noise goe's this;
There is among the Greekes,
A Lord of Troian blood, Nephew to Hector,
They call him Aiax.
Cre. Good; and what of him?
175Man. They say he is a very man per se and stands alone.
Cre. So do all men, vnlesse they are drunke, sicke, or
haue no legges.
Man. This man Lady, hath rob'd many beasts of their
particular additions, he is as valiant as the Lyon, churlish
180as the Beare, slow as the Elephant: a man into whom
nature hath so crowded humors, that his valour is crusht
into folly, his folly sauced with discretion: there is no
man hath a vertue, that he hath not a glimpse of, nor a-
ny man an attaint, but he carries some staine of it. He is
185melancholy without cause, and merry against the haire,
hee hath the ioynts of euery thing, but euery thing so
out ot ioynt, that hee is a gowtie Briareus, many hands
and no vse; or purblinded Argus, all eyes and no sight.
Cre. But how should this man that makes me smile,
190make Hector angry?
Man. They say he yesterday cop'd Hector in the bat-
tell and stroke him downe, the disdaind & shame where-
of, hath euer since kept Hector fasting and waking.
Enter Pandarus.
195Cre. Who comes here?
Man. Madam your Vncle Pandarus.
Cre. Hectors a gallant man.
Man. As may be in the world Lady.
Pan. What's that? what's that?
200Cre. Good morrow Vncle Pandarus.
Pan. Good morrow Cozen Cressid: what do you talke
of? good morrow Alexander: how do you Cozen? when
were you at Illium?
Cre. This morning Vncle.
205Pan. What were you talking of when I came? Was
Hector arm'd and gon ere yea came to Illium? Hellen was
not vp? was she?
Cre. Hector was gone but Hellen was not vp?
Pan. E'ene so; Hector was stirring early.
210Cre. That were we talking of, and of his anger.
Pan. Was he angry?
Cre. So he saies here.
Pan. True he was so; I know the cause too, heele lay
about him to day I can tell them that, and there's Troylus
215will not come farre behind him, let them take heede of
Troylus; I can tell them that too.
Cre. What is he angry too?
Pan. Who Troylus?
Troylus is the better man of the two.
220Cre. Oh Iupiter; there's no comparison.
Pan. What not betweene Troylus and Hector? do you
know a man if you see him?
Cre. I, if I euer saw him before and knew him.
Pan. Well I say Troylus is Troylus.
225Cre. Then you say as I say,
For I am sure he is not Hector.
Pan. No not Hector is not Troylus in some degrees.
Cre. 'Tis iust, to each of them he is himselfe.
Pan. Himselfe? alas poore Troylus I would he were.
230Cre. So he is.
Pan. Condition I had gone bare-foote to India.
Cre. He is not Hector.
Pan. Himselfe? no? hee's not himselfe, would a were
himselfe: well, the Gods are aboue, time must friend or
235end: well Troylus well, I would my heart were in her bo-
dy; no, Hector is not a better man then Troylus.
Cre. Excuse me.
Pan. He is elder.
Cre. Pardon me, pardon me.
240Pan. Th'others not come too't, you shall tell me ano-
ther tale when th'others come too't: Hector shall not
haue his will this yeare.
Cre. He shall not neede it if he haue his owne.
Pan. Nor his qualities.
245Cre. No matter.
Pan. Nor his beautie.
Cre. 'Twould not become him, his own's better.
Pan. You haue no iudgement Neece; Hellen her selfe
swore th'other day, that Troylus for a browne fauour (for
250so 'tis I must confesse) not browne neither.
Cre. No, but browne.
Pan. Faith to say truth, browne and not browne.
Cre. To say the truth, true and not true.
Pan. She prais'd his complexion aboue Paris.
255Cre. Why Paris hath colour inough.
Pan. So he has.
Cre. Then Troylus should haue too much, if she prasi'd
him aboue, his complexion is higher then his, he hauing
colour enough, and the other higher, is too flaming a
260praise for a good complexion, I had as lieue Hellens gol-
den tongue had commended Troylus for a copper nose.
Pan. I sweare to you,
I thinke Hellen loues him better then Paris.
Cre. Then shee's a merry Greeke indeed.
265Pan. Nay I am sure she does, she came to him th'other
day into the compast window, and you know he has not
past three or foure haires on his chinne.
Cres. Indeed a Tapsters Arithmetique may soone
bring his particulars therein, to a totall.
270Pand. Why he is very yong, and yet will he within
three pound lift as much as his brother Hector.
Cres. Is he is so young a man, and so old a lifter?
Pan. But to prooue to you that Hellen loues him, she
came and puts me her white hand to his clouen chin.
275Cres. Iuno haue mercy, how came it clouen?
Pan. Why, you know 'tis dimpled,
I thinke his smyling becomes him better then any man
in all Phrigia.
Cre. Oh he smiles valiantly.
280Pan. Dooes hee not?
Cre. Oh yes, and 'twere a clow'd in Autumne.
Pan. Why go to then, but to proue to you that Hellen
loues Troylus.
Cre. Troylus wil stand to thee
285Proofe, if youle prooue it so.
Pan. Troylus? why he esteemes her no more then I e-
steeme an addle egge.
Cre. If you loue an addle egge as well as you loue an
idle head, you would eate chickens i'th' shell.
290Pan. I cannot chuse but laugh to thinke how she tick-
led his chin, indeed shee has a maruel's white hand I must
needs confesse.
Cre. Without the racke.
Pan. And shee takes vpon her to spie a white haire on
295his chinne.
Cre. Alas poore chin? many a wart is richer.
Pand. But there was such laughing, Queene Hecuba
laught that her eyes ran ore.
Cre. With Milstones.
300Pan. And Cassandra laught.
Cre. But there was more temperate fire vnder the pot
of her eyes: did her eyes run ore too?
Pan. And Hector laught.
Cre. At what was all this laughing?
305Pand. Marry at the white haire that Hellen spied on
Troylus chin.
Cres. And t'had beene a greene haire, I should haue
laught too.
Pand. They laught not so much at the haire, as at his
310pretty answere.
Cre. What was his answere?
Pan. Quoth shee, heere's but two and fifty haires on
your chinne; and one of them is white.
Cre. This is her question.
315Pand That's true, make no question of that, two and
fiftie haires quoth hee, and one white, that white haire is
my Father, and all the rest are his Sonnes. Iupiter quoth
she, which of these haires is Paris my husband? The for-
ked one quoth he, pluckt out and giue it him: but there
320was such laughing, and Hellen so blusht, and Paris so
chaft, and all the rest so laught, that it past.
Cre. So let it now,
For is has beene a grcat while going by.
Pan. Well Cozen,
325I told you a thing yesterday, think on't.
Cre. So I does.
Pand. Ile be sworne 'tis true, he will weepe you
an'twere a man borne in Aprill.
Sound a retreate.
Cres. And Ile spring vp in his teares , an'twere a nettle
330against May.
Pan. Harke they are comming from the field, shal we
stand vp here and see them, as they passe toward Illium,
good Neece do, sweet Neece Cressida.
Cre. At your pleasure.
335Pan. Heere, heere, here's an excellent place, heere we
may see most brauely, Ile tel you them all by their names,
as they passe by, but marke Troylus aboue the rest.
Enter Æneas.
Cre. Speake not so low'd.
340Pan. That's Æneas, is not that a braue man, hee's one
of the flowers of Troy I can you, but marke Troylus, you
shal see anon.
Cre. Who's that?
Enter Antenor.
345Pan. That's Antenor, he has a shrow'd wit I can tell
you, and hee's a man good inough, hee's one o'th soun-
dest iudgement in Troy whosoeuer, and a proper man of
person: when comes Troylus? Ile shew you Troylus anon,
if hee see me, you shall see him him nod at me.
350Cre. Will he giue you the nod?
Pan. You shall see.
Cre. If he do, the rich shall haue, more.
Enter Hector.
Pan. That's Hector, that, that, looke you, that there's a
355fellow. Goe thy way Hector, there's a braue man Neece,
O braue Hector! Looke how hee lookes? there's a coun-
tenance; ist not a braue man?
Cre. O braue man!
Pan. Is a not? It dooes a mans heart good, looke you
360what hacks are on his Helmet, looke you yonder, do you
see? Looke you there? There's no iesting, laying on, tak't
off, who ill as they say, there be hacks.
Cre. Be those with Swords?
Enter Paris.
365Pan. Swords, any thing he cares not, and the diuell
come to him, it's all one, by Gods lid it dooes ones heart
good. Yonder comes Paris, yonder comes Paris: looke
yee yonder Neece, ist not a gallant man to, ist not? Why
this is braue now: who said he came hurt home to day?
370Hee's not hurt, why this will do Hellens heart good
now, ha? Would I could see Troylus now, you shall Troy-
lus anon.
Cre. Whose that?
Enter Hellenus.
375Pan. That's Hellenus, I maruell where Troylus is, that's
Helenus, I thinke he went not forth to day: that's Hel-
lenus.
Cre. Can Hellenus fight Vncle?
Pan. Hellenus no: yes heele fight indifferent, well, I
380maruell where Troylus is; harke, do you not haere the
people crie Troylus? Hellenus is a Priest.
Cre. What sneaking fellow comes yonder?
Enter Trylus.
Pan. Where? Yonder? That's Dœphobus.'Tis Troy-
385lus! Ther's a man Neece, hem? Braue Troylus the Prince
of Chiualrie.
Cre. Peace, for shame peace.
Pand. Marke him, not him: O braue Troylus: looke
well vpon him Neece, looke you how his Sword is blou-
390died, and his Helme more hackt then Hectors, and how he
lookes, and how he goes. O admirable youth! he ne're
saw three and twenty. Go thy way Troylus, go thy way,
had I a sister were a Grace, or a daughter a Goddesse, hee
should take his choice. O admirable man! Paris? Paris
395is durt to him, and I warrant, Helen to change, would
giue money to boot.
Enter common Souldiers.
Cres. Heere come more.
Pan. Asses, fooles, dolts, chaffe and bran, chaffe and
400bran; porredge after meat. I could liue and dye i'th'eyes
of Troylus. Ne're looke, ne're looke; the Eagles are gon,
Crowes and Dawes, Crowes and Dawes: I had rather be
such a man as Troylus, then Agamemnon, and all Greece.
Cres. There is among the Greekes Achilles, a better
405man then Troylus.
Pan. Achilles? a Dray-man, a Porter, a very Camell.
Cres. Well, well.
Pan. Well, well? Why haue you any discretion? haue
you any eyes? Do you know what a man is? Is not birth,
410b auty, good shape, discourse, manhood, learning, gen-
tlenesse, vertue, youth, liberality, and so forth: the Spice,
and salt that seasons a man?
Cres. I, a minc'd man, and then to be bak'd with no Date
in the pye, for then the mans dates out.
415Pan. You are such another woman, one knowes not
at what ward you lye.
Cres. Vpon my backe, to defend my belly; vpon my
wit, to defend my wiles; vppon my secrecy, to defend
mine honesty; my Maske, to defend my beauty, and you
420to defend all these: and at all these wardes I lye at, at a
thousand watches.
Pan. Say one of your watches.
Cres. Nay Ile watch you for that, and that's one of
the cheefest of them too: If I cannot ward what I would
425not haue hit, I can watch you for telling how I took the
blow, vnlesse it swell past hiding, and then it's past wat-
ching.
Enter Boy.
Pan. You are such another.
430Boy. Sir, my Lord would instantly speake with you.
Pan. Where?
Boy. At your owne house.
Pan. Good Boy tell him I come, I doubt he bee hurt.
Fare ye well good Neece.
435Cres. Adieu Vnkle.
Pan. Ile be with you Neece by and by.
Cres. To bring Vnkle.
Pan. I, a token from Troylus.
Cres. By the same token, you are a Bawd.
Exit Pand.
440Words, vowes, gifts, teares, & loues full sacrifice,
He offers in anothers enterprise:
But more in Troylus thousand fold I see,
Then in the glasse of Pandar's praise may be;
Yet hold I off. Women are Angels wooing,
445Things won are done, ioyes soule lyes in the dooing:
That she belou'd, knowes nought, that knowes not this;
Men prize the thing vngain'd, more then it is.
That she was neuer yet, that euer knew
Loue got so sweet, as when desire did sue:
450Therefore this maxime out of loue I teach;
"Atchieuement, is command; vngain'd, beseech.
That though my hearts Contents firme loue doth beare,
Nothing of that shall from mine eyes appeare.
Exit.