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  • Title: The Puritan (Folio 3, 1664)

  • Copyright Digital Renaissance Editions. This text may be freely used for educational, non-profit purposes; for all other uses contact the Editor.
    Authors: Thomas Middleton, William Shakespeare
    Not Peer Reviewed

    The Puritan (Folio 3, 1664)

    The Puritan Widow.

    Actus Quartus.

    Enter Moll, and Sir John Penny-Dub.

    1750Pen. But I hope you will not serve a Knight so, Gen-
    tlewoman, will you? to casheer him, and cast him off
    at your pleasure; what doe you think I was dubb'd for
    nothing, no by my faith Ladies daughter.
    Moll. Pray Sir John Penny-Dub, let it be defer'd a-
    1755while, I have a heart to marry as you can have; but as
    the Fortune-teller told me.
    Penny. Pax-oth' Fortune-teller, would Derrick had
    been his fortune seven yeare ago, to crosse my love thus:
    did he know what case I was in? why this is able to make
    1760a man drown himself in's Father's Fish-pond.
    Moll. And then he told me moreover, Sir John, that
    the breach of it, kept my Father in Purgatory.
    Penny. In Purgatory? why let him purge out his heart
    there, what have we to doe with that? there's Physicians
    1765enow there to cast his water, is that any matter to us?
    how can he hinder our love? why let him be hang'd now
    he's dead?---Well, have I rid post day and night, to
    bring you merry newes of my Fathers death, and now---
    Moll. Thy Fathers death? is the old Farmer dead?
    1770Penny. As dead as his Barn door, Moll.
    Moll. And you'll keep your word with me now, sir
    John, that I shall have my Coach and my Coach-man?
    Penny. I faith.
    Moll. And two white Horses with black Feathers to
    1775draw it?
    Penny. Too.
    Moll. A guarded Lackey to run befor't, and py'd Li-
    veries to come trashing after't.
    Pen. Thou shalt Moll.
    1780Mol. And to let me have money in my purse to go whe-
    ther I will.
    Pen. All this.
    Moll. Then come, whatsoe're come's on't, we'll be
    made sure together before the Maids oth' Kitchin.

    Enter Widow with her eldest Daughter, Franck,
    and Frailty.

    Wid. How now? where's my Brother Sir Godfrey?
    went he forth this morning?
    Frail. O no Madam, he's above at break-fast, with
    1790sir reverence a Conjurer.
    Wid. A Conjurer? what manner of fellow is he?
    Frail. Oh, a wondrous rare fellow, Mistresse, very
    strongly made upward, for he goes in a Buff-Jerkin: he
    sayes he will fetch Sir Godfrey's Chain agen, if it hang
    1795between heaven and earth.
    Wid. What he will not? then he's an exlent fellow I
    warrant: how happy were that woman to be blest with
    such a Husband, a man cunning? how do's he look, Frail-
    ty? very swartly I warrant, with black beard, scorcht
    1800cheeks, and smoaky eye-browes.
    Frail. Fooh--he's neither smoak-dryed, nor scorcht,
    nor black, nor nothing, I tell you, Madam, he looks as
    fair to see to, as one of us; I do think but if you saw him
    once, you'de take him to be a Christian.
    1805Franck. So fair, and yet so cunning, that's to be won-
    dred at, mother.
    Enter Sir Andrew Muck-hill, and Sir An-
    drew Tipstaffe.
    Muck. Blesse you, sweet Lady.
    1810Tip. And you, fair Mistresse.
    Exit Frailty.
    Wid. Coades, what do you mean, Gentlemen? fie,
    did I not give you your answers?
    Muck. Sweet Lady?
    Wid. Well, I will not stick with you for a kisse:
    1815Daughter, kisse the Gentleman for once.
    Franck. Yes forsooth.
    Tip. I'me proud of such a favour.
    Wid. Truly la, sir Oliver, y'are much to blame to
    come agen when you know my mind, so well deliver'd---
    1820as a Widow could deliver a thing.
    Muck. But I exspect a farther comfort, Lady.
    Wid. Why la you now, did I not desire you to put off
    your suit quite and clean when you came to me again?
    how say you? did I not?
    1825Muck. But the sincere love which my heart beares to
    Wid. Go to, I'le cut you off; and Sir Oliver to put
    you in comfort, afar off, my fortune is read me, I must
    marry again.
    1830Muck. O blest fortune!
    Wid. But not as long as I can choose; nay, I'le hold
    out well.
    Enter Frailty.
    Frail. O Madam, Madam.
    1835Wid. How now? what's the haste?
    In her ear.
    Tipst. Faith, Mistresse Frances, I'le maintain you gal-
    lantly, I'le bring you to Court, wean you among the fair
    society of Ladies poor Kinswomen of mine in cloth of
    Silver, beside you shall have your Moncky, your Parrat,
    1840your Muskat, and your Pisse, Pisse, Pisse.
    Franck. It will doe very well.
    Wid. What, do's he mean to Conjure here then? how
    shall I do to be rid of these Knights,--please you Gen-
    tlemen to walk a while ith' Garden, to gather a pinck, or
    1845a Jillly-flower.
    Both. With all our hearts, Lady, and count us fa-
    Sir God. within. Step in Nicholas, look, is the coast
    1850Nich. Oh, as clear as a Carter's eye, sir.
    Sir God. Then enter Captain Conjurer:---now
    how like you our Room, sir?

    Enter Sir Godfrey, Captain, Pye-boord, Edmond,

    1855Cap. O wonderfull convenient.
    Edm. I can tell you, Captain, simply though it lies
    here, tis the fairest Room in my Mothers house, as dainty
    a Room to Conjure in, me thinks,---why you may bid,
    I cannot tell how many Devils welcome in't; my Father
    1860has had twenty in't at once!
    Pye. What Devils?
    Edm. Devils, no Deputies, and the wealthiest men he
    could get.
    Sir God. Nay put by your chats now, fall to your bu-
    1865sinesse roundly, the Fescue of the Diall is upon the Chris-
    crosse of Noon: but oh, hear me, Captain, a qualme
    comes o're my stomack.
    Cap. Why, what's the matter, sir?
    Sir God. Oh, how if the Devil should prove a knave,
    1870and tear the hangings.
    Cap. Fuh,