Internet Shakespeare Editions

Author: William Shakespeare
Editor: James D. Mardock
Peer Reviewed

Henry V (Quarto 1, 1600)


505
Enter Nim and Bardolfe.
Bar. Godmorrow Corporall Nim.
Nim. Godmorrow Lieftenant Bardolfe.
Bar. What is antient Pistoll and thee friends yet?
508.1Nim. I cannot tell, things must be as they may:
I dare not fight, but I will winke and hold out mine Iron:
It is a simple one, but what tho; it will serue to toste cheese,
And it will endure cold as an other mans sword will,
And theres the humor of it.
514.1Bar. Yfaith mistresse quickly did thee great wrong,
For thou weart troth plight to her.
Nim. I must do as I may, tho patience be a tyred mare,
Yet sheel plod, and some say kniues haue edges,
525And men may sleepe and haue their throtes about them
At that time, and there is the humour of it.
515Bar. Come yfaith, Ile bestow a breakfast to make Pistoll
And thee friendes. What a plague should we carrie kniues
515.1To cut our owne throates.
Nim. Yfaith Ile liue as long as I may, thats the certaine of it.
And when I cannot liue any longer, Ile do as I may,
520And theres my rest, and the randeuous of it.
530
Enter Pistoll and Hostes Quickly, his wife.
530.1Bar. Godmorrow ancient Pistoll.
Here comes ancient Pistoll, I prithee Nim be quiet.
Nim. How do you my Hoste?
Pist.Base slaue, callest thou me hoste?
Now by gads lugges I sweare, I scorne the title,
535Nor shall my Nell keepe lodging.
Host. No by my troath not I,
For we cānot bed nor boord halfe a score honest gētlewomē
That liue honestly by the prick of their needle,
But it is thought straight we keepe a bawdy-house.
539.1O Lord heeres Corporall Nims, now shall
We haue wilful adultry and murther committed:
541.1Good Corporall Nim shew the valour of a man,
And put vp your sword.
Nim. Push.
544.1Pist. What dost thou push, thou prickeard cur of Iseland?
Nim. Will you shog off? I would haue you solus.
550Pist. Solus egregious dog, that solus in thy throte,
And in thy lungs, and which is worse, within
Thy mesfull mouth, I do retort that solus in thy
Bowels, and in thy Iaw, perdie: for I can talke,
And Pistolls flashing firy cock is vp.
Nim. I am not Barbasom, you cannot coniure me:
I haue an humour Pistoll to knock you indifferently well,
And you fall foule with me Pistoll, Ile scoure you with my
Rapier in faire termes. If you will walke off a little,
560Ile prick your guts a litle in good termes,
And theres the humour of it.
Pist. O braggard vile, and damned furious wight,
The Graue doth gape, and groaning
Death is neare, therefore exall.
563.1
They drawe.
565Bar. Heare me, he that strikes the first blow,
Ile kill him, as I am a souldier.
Pist. An oath of mickle might, and fury shall abate.
Nim. Ile cut your throat at one time or an other in faire
And theres the humor of it.
Pist. Couple gorge is the word, I thee defie agen:
A damned hound, thinkst thou my spouse to get?
575No, to the powdering tub of infamy,
Fetch forth the lazar kite of Cresides kinde,
Doll Tear-sheete, she by name, and her espowse
I haue, and I will hold, the quandom quickly,
For the onely she and Paco, there it is inough.
580
Enter the Boy.
Boy. Hostes you must come straight to my maister,
And you Host Pistoll. Good Bardolfe
Put thy nose between the sheets, and do the office of a
Host. By my troath heele yeeld the crow a pudding one
586.1Ile go to him, husband youle come?
Bar. Come Pistoll be friends.
Nim prithee be friends, and if thou wilt not be
Enemies with me too.
Ni. I shal haue my eight shillings I woon of you at beating?
Pist. Base is the slaue that payes.
Nim. That now I will haue, and theres the humor of it.
Pist. As manhood shall compound.
They draw.
Bar. He that strikes the first blow,
600Ile kill him by this sword.
Pist. Sword is an oath, and oathes must haue their course.
601.1Nim. I shall haue my eight shillings I wonne of you at
beating?
605Pist. A noble shalt thou haue, and readie pay,
And liquor likewise will giue to thee,
And friendship shall combind and brotherhood:
Ile liue by Nim as Nim shall liue by me:
Is not this iust? for I shall Sutler be
Vnto the Campe, and profit will occrue.
Nim. I shall haue my noble?
Pist. In cash most truly paid.
Nim. Why theres the humour of it.
Enter Hostes.
615Hostes. As euer you came of men come in,
Sir Iohn poore soule is so troubled
With a burning tashan contigian feuer, tis wonderfull.
625Pist. Let us condoll the knight: for lamkins we will liue.
625.1
Exeunt omnes.