Internet Shakespeare Editions

Author: William Shakespeare
Editor: Erin Kelly
Not Peer Reviewed

The Taming of the Shrew (Folio 1, 1623)


222
The Taming of the Shrew.
1785Kate. Patience I pray you, 'twas a fault vnwilling.
Pet. A horson beetle-headed flap-ear'd knaue:
Come Kate sit downe, I know you haue a stomacke,
Will you giue thankes, sweete Kate, or else shall I?
What's this, Mutton?
17901.Ser. I.
Pet. Who brought it?
Peter. I.
Pet. 'Tis burnt, and so is all the meate:
What dogges are these? Where is the rascall Cooke?
1795How durst you villaines bring it from the dresser
And serue it thus to me that loue it not?
There, take it to you, trenchers, cups, and all:
You heedlesse iolt-heads, and vnmanner'd slaues.
What, do you grumble? Ile be with you straight.
1800Kate. I pray you husband be not so disquiet,
The meate was well, if you were so contented.
Pet. I tell thee Kate, 'twas burnt and dried away,
And I expressely am forbid to touch it:
For it engenders choller, planteth anger,
1805And better 'twere that both of vs did fast,
Since of our selues, our selues are chollericke,
Then feede it with such ouer-rosted flesh:
Be patient, to morrow't shalbe mended,
And for this night we'l fast for companie.
1810Come I wil bring thee to thy Bridall chamber.
Exeunt.
Enter Seruants seuerally.
Nath. Peter didst euer see the like.
Peter. He kils her in her owne humor.
Grumio. Where is he?
1815
Enter Curtis a Seruant.
Cur. In her chamber, making a sermon of continen-
cie to her, and railes, and sweares, and rates, that shee
(poore soule) knowes not which way to stand, to looke,
to speake, and sits as one new risen from a dreame. A-
1820way, away, for he is comming hither.
Enter Petruchio.
Pet. Thus haue I politickely begun my reigne,
And 'tis my hope to end successefully:
My Faulcon now is sharpe, and passing emptie,
1825And til she stoope, she must not be full gorg'd,
For then she neuer lookes vpon her lure.
Another way I haue to man my Haggard,
To make her come, and know her Keepers call:
That is, to watch her, as we watch these Kites,
1830That baite, and beate, and will not be obedient:
She eate no meate to day, nor none shall eate.
Last night she slept not, nor to night she shall not:
As with the meate, some vndeserued fault
Ile finde about the making of the bed,
1835And heere Ile fling the pillow, there the boulster,
This way the Couerlet, another way the sheets:
I, and amid this hurlie I intend,
That all is done in reuerend care of her,
And in conclusion, she shal watch all night,
1840And if she chance to nod, Ile raile and brawle,
And with the clamor keepe her stil awake:
This is a way to kil a Wife with kindnesse,
And thus Ile curbe her mad and headstrong humor:
He that knowes better how to tame a shrew,
1845Now let him speake, 'tis charity to shew.
Exit
Enter Tranio and Hortensio.
Tra. Is't possible friend Lisio, that mistris Bianca
Doth fancie any other but Lucentio,
I tel you sir, she beares me faire in hand.
1850Luc. Sir, to satisfie you in what I haue said,
Stand by, and marke the manner of his teaching.
Enter Bianca.
Hor. Now Mistris, profit you in what you reade?
Bian. What Master reade you first, resolue me that?
1855Hor. I reade, that I professe the Art to loue.
Bian And may you proue sir Master of your Art.
Luc. While you sweet deere ptoue Mistresse of my
heart.
Hor. Quicke proceeders marry, now tel me I pray,
1860you that durst sweare that your Mistris Bianca
Lou'd me in the World so wel as Lucentio.
Tra. Oh despightful Loue, vnconstant womankind,
I tel thee Lisio this is wonderfull.
Hor. Mistake no more, I am not Lisio,
1865Nor a Musitian as I seeme to bee,
But one that scorne to liue in this disguise,
For such a one as leaues a Gentleman,
And makes a God of such a Cullion;
Know sir, that I am cal'd Hortensio.
1870Tra. Signior Hortensio, I haue often heard
Of your entire affection to Bianca,
And since mine eyes are witnesse of her lightnesse,
I wil with you, if you be so contented,
Forsweare Bianca, and her loue for euer.
1875Hor. See how they kisse and court: Signior Lucentio,
Heere is my hand, and heere I firmly vow
Neuer to woo her more, but do forsweare her
As one vnworthie all the former fauours
That I haue fondly flatter'd them withall.
1880Tra. And heere I take the like vnfained oath,
Neuer to marrie with her, though she would intreate,
Fie on her, see how beastly she doth court him.
Hor. Would all the world but he had quite forsworn
For me, that I may surely keepe mine oath.
1885I wil be married to a wealthy Widdow,
Ere three dayes passe, which hath as long lou'd me,
As I haue lou'd this proud disdainful Haggard,
And so farewel signior Lucentio,
Kindnesse in women, not their beauteous lookes
1890Shal win my loue, and so I take my leaue,
In resolution, as I swore before.
Tra. Mistris Bianca, blesse you with such grace,
As longeth to a Louers blessed case:
Nay, I haue tane you napping gentle Loue,
1895And haue forsworne you with Hortensio.
Bian. Tranio you iest, but haue you both forsworne
mee?
Tra. Mistris we haue.
Luc. Then we are rid of Lisio.
1900Tra. I'faith hee'l haue a lustie Widdow now,
That shalbe woo'd, and wedded in a day.
Bian. God giue him ioy.
Tra. I, and hee'l tame her.
Bianca. He sayes so Tranio.
1905Tra. Faith he is gone vnto the taming schoole.
Bian. The taming schoole: what is there such a place?
Tra. I mistris, and Petruchio is the master,
That teacheth trickes eleuen and twentie long,
To tame a shrew, and charme her chattering tongue.
1910
Enter Biondello.
Bion. Oh Master, master I haue watcht so long,
That I am dogge-wearie, but at last I spied
An ancient Angel comming downe the hill,
Wil serue the turne.
1915Tra. What is he Biondello?
Bio. Master, a Marcantant, or a pedant,
I