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The Taming of the Shrew (Folio 1, 1623)

Author: William Shakespeare
Editor: Erin Kelly
Not Peer Reviewed
220
The Taming of the Shrew.
And watch our vantage in this businesse,
Wee'll ouer-reach the grey-beard Gremio,
The narrow prying father Minola,
1530The quaint Musician, amorous Litio,
All for my Masters sake Lucentio.

Enter Gremio.

Signior Gremio, came you from the Church?
Gre. As willingly as ere I came from schoole.
1535Tra. And is the Bride & Bridegroom coming home?
Gre. A bridegroome say you? 'tis a groome indeed,
A grumlling groome, and that the girle shall finde.
Tra. Curster then she, why 'tis impossible.
Gre. Why hee's a deuill, a deuill, a very fiend.
1540Tra. Why she's a deuill, a deuill, the deuils damme.
Gre. Tut, she's a Lambe, a Doue, a foole to him:
Ile tell you sir Lucentio; when the Priest
Should aske if Katherine should be his wife,
I, by goggs woones quoth he, and swore so loud,
1545That all amaz'd the Priest let fall the booke,
And as he stoop'd againe to take it vp,
This mad-brain'd bridegroome tooke him such a cuffe,
That downe fell Priest and booke, and booke and Priest,
Now take them vp quoth he, if any list.
1550Tra. What said the wench when he rose againe?
Gre. Trembled and shooke: for why, he stamp'd and
swore, as if the Vicar meant to cozen him: but after ma-
ny ceremonies done, hee calls for wine, a health quoth
he, as if he had beene aboord carowsing to his Mates af-
1555ter a storme, quaft off the Muscadell, and threw the sops
all in the Sextons face: hauing no other reason, but that
his beard grew thinne and hungerly, and seem'd to aske
him sops as hee was drinking: This done, hee tooke the
Bride about the necke, and kist her lips with such a cla-
1560morous smacke, that at the parting all the Church did
eccho: and I seeing this, came thence for very shame, and
after mee I know the rout is comming, such a mad mar-
ryage neuer was before: harke, harke, I heare the min-
strels play.
Musicke playes.

1565
Enter Petruchio, Kate, Bianca, Hortensio, Baptista.

Petr.Gentlemen & friends, I thank you for your pains,
I know you thinke to dine with me to day,
And haue prepar'd great store of wedding cheere,
But so it is, my haste doth call me hence,
1570And therefore heere I meane to take my leaue.
Bap. Is't possible you will away to night?
Pet. I must away to day before night come,
Make it no wonder: if you knew my businesse,
You would intreat me rather goe then stay:
1575And honest company, I thanke you all,
That haue beheld me giue away my selfe
To this most patient, sweet, and vertuous wife,
Dine with my father, drinke a health to me,
For I must hence, and farewell to you all.
1580Tra. Let vs intreat you stay till after dinner.
Pet. It may not be.
Gra. Let me intreat you.
Pet. It cannot be.
Kat. Let me intreat you.
1585Pet. I am content.
Kat. Are you content to stay?
Pet. I am content you shall entreat me stay,
But yet not stay, entreat me how you can.
Kat. Now if you loue me stay.
1590Pet. Grumio, my horse.
Gru. I sir, they be ready, the Oates haue eaten the
horses.
Kate. Nay then,
Doe what thou canst, I will not goe to day,
1595No, nor to morrow, not till I please my selfe,
The dore is open sir, there lies your way,
You may be iogging whiles your bootes are greene:
For me, Ile not be gone till I please my selfe,
'Tis like you'll proue a iolly surly groome,
1600That take it on you at the first so roundly.
Pet. O Kate content thee, prethee be not angry.
Kat. I will be angry, what hast thou to doe?
Father, be quiet, he shall stay my leisure.
Gre. I marry sir, now it begins to worke.
1605Kat. Gentlemen, forward to the bridall dinner,
I see a woman may be made a foole
If she had not a spirit to resist.
Pet. They shall goe forward Kate at thy command,
Obey the Bride you that attend on her.
1610Goe to the feast, reuell and domineere,
Carowse full measure to her maiden-head,
Be madde and merry, or goe hang your selues:
But for my bonny Kate, she must with me:
Nay, looke not big, nor stampe, nor stare, nor fret,
1615I will be master of what is mine owne,
Shee is my goods, my chattels, she is my house,
My houshold-stuffe, my field, my barne,
My horse, my oxe, my asse, my any thing,
And heere she stands, touch her who euer dare,
1620Ile bring mine action on the proudest he
That stops my way in Padua: Grumio
Draw forth thy weapon, we are beset with theeues,
Rescue thy Mistresse if thou be a man:
Feare not sweet wench, they shall not touch thee Kate,
1625Ile buckler thee against a Million.
Exeunt. P. Ka.
Bap.Nay, let them goe, a couple of quiet ones.
Gre.Went they not quickly, I should die with laugh-
Tra. Of all mad matches neuer was the like.
Luc. Mistresse, what's your opinion of your sister?
1630Bian.That being mad her selfe, she's madly mated.
Gre. I warrant him Petruchio is Kated.
Bap.Neighbours and friends, though Bride & Bride-
For to supply the places at the table,
You know there wants no iunkets at the feast:
1635Lucentio, you shall supply the Bridegroomes place,
And let Bianca take her sisters roome.
Tra. Shall sweet Bianca practise how to bride it?
Bap. She shall Lucentio: come gentlemen lets goe.
Enter Grumio.
Exeunt.
1640Gru.: Fie, fie on all tired Iades, on all mad Masters, &
all foule waies: was euer man so beaten? was euer man
so raide? was euer man so weary? I am sent before to
make a fire, and they are comming after to warme them:
now were not I a little pot,& soone hot; my very lippes
1645might freeze to my teeth, my tongue to the roofe of my
mouth, my heart in my belly, ere l should come by a fire
to thaw me, but I with blowing the fire shall warme my
selfe: for considering the weather, a taller man then I
will take cold: Holla, hoa (urtis.

1650
Enter Curtis.
Curt. Who is that calls so coldly?
Gru. A piece of Ice: if thou doubt it, thou maist
slide from my shoulder to my heele, with no
greater