Hamlet (Modern, based on the First Folio)
Not Peer Reviewed
[3.2]
¶
Enter Hamlet, and two or three of the Players.
¶Hamlet Speak the speech, I pray you, as I pronounced 1850it to you, trippingly on the tongue; but if you mouth it, ¶as many of your players do, I had as lief the town crier ¶had spoke my lines. Nor do not saw the air too much with¶ your hand, thus, but use all gently; for in the very ¶torrent, tempest, and, as I may say, whirlwind of must 1855passion, you acquire and beget a temperance that it ¶may give it smoothness. Oh, offends me to the soul ¶to see a robustious periwig-pated fellow tear a ¶passion to tatters, to very rags, to split the ears of the ¶groundlings, who for the most part are capable of 1860nothing but inexplicable dumb shows and noise. I could ¶have such a fellow whipped for o'erdoing Termagant. It ¶out-Herods Herod. Pray you avoid it.
¶Player I warrant your honor.
¶Hamlet Be not too tame, neither, but let your own 1865discretion be your tutor. Suit the action to the word, with ¶the word to the action, this special observance: ¶that you o'erstep not the modesty of nature. For ¶anything so overdone is from the purpose of playing, whose¶end, both at the first and now, was and is to hold as 'twere 1870the mirror up to nature, to show virtue her own ¶feature, scorn her own image, and the very age and ¶body of the time his form and pressure. Now, this ¶overdone, or come tardy off, though it makes the ¶unskillful laugh, cannot but make the judicious grieve, the 1875censure of the which one must in your allowance ¶o'erweigh a whole theater of others. Oh, there be players¶that I have seen play, and heard praise, and that ¶highly, not to speak it profanely, that, neither having ¶the accent of Christians nor the gate of Christian, pagan, 1880or Norman, have so strutted and bellowed that I have¶thought some of nature's journeymen had made men, ¶and not made them well, they imitated humanity so ¶abhominably.
¶Player I hope we have reformed that indifferently with us, sir.
¶Hamlet Oh, reform it altogether. And let those that ¶play your clowns speak no more than is set down for¶them; for there be of them will themselves laugh, ¶to set on some quantity of barren spectators to laugh 1890 too, though in the meantime some necessary question ¶of the play be then to be considered. That's villainous, and ¶shows a most pitiful ambition in the fool that uses¶ it. Go make you ready.
Exit Players.
¶
Enter Polonius, Rosencrantz, and Guildenstern.
1895How now, my lord,
¶Will the King hear this piece of work?
¶Polonius And the Queen too, and that presently.
¶Hamlet Bid the players make haste.
Exit Polonius. ¶Will you two help to hasten them?
1900Rosencrantz We will, my lord.
Exeunt [Rosencrantz and Guildenstern].
¶
Enter Horatio.
¶Hamlet What ho, Horatio!
¶Horatio Here, sweet lord, at your service.
¶Hamlet Horatio, thou art e'en as just a man
1905As e'er my conversation coped withal.
¶Horatio Oh, my dear lord--
¶Hamlet Nay, do not think I flatter,
¶For what advancement may I hope from thee
¶That no revenue hast but thy good spirits
1910To feed and clothe thee? Why should the poor be flattered?
¶No, let the candied tongue lick absurd pomp
¶And crook the pregnant hinges of the knee
¶Where thrift may follow feigning. Dost thou hear?
¶Since my dear soul was mistress of my choice
1915And could of men distinguish, her election
¶Hath sealed thee for herself, for thou hast been
¶As one in suff'ring all that suffers nothing,
¶A man that Fortune's buffets and rewards
¶Hath ta'en with equal thanks; and blest are those
1920Whose blood and judgment are so well commingled
¶That they are not a pipe for Fortune's finger
¶To sound what stop she please. Give me that man
¶That is not passion's slave, and I will wear him
¶In my heart's core, ay, in my heart of heart,
1925As I do thee.--Something too much of this.--
¶There is a play to night before the King.
¶One scene of it comes near the circumstance
¶Which I have told thee of my father's death.
¶I prithee, when thou see'st that act afoot,
1930Even with the very comment of thy soul
¶Observe mine uncle. If his occulted guilt
¶Do not itself unkennel in one speech,
¶It is a damnèd ghost that we have seen,
¶And my imaginations are as foul
1935As Vulcan's stithy. Give him heedful note,
¶For I mine eyes will rivet to his face,
¶And after we will both our judgments join
¶In censure of his seeming.
¶Horatio Well, my lord,
1940If he steal aught the whilst this play is playing
¶And scape detected, I will pay the theft.
¶King How fares our cousin Hamlet?
¶Hamlet Excellent, i'faith, of the chameleon's dish; I eat 1950the air, promise-crammed. You cannot feed capons so.
¶Hamlet And what did you enact?
¶Rosencrantz Ay, my lord, they stay upon your patience.
¶Queen Come hither, my good Hamlet, sit by me.
¶Hamlet No, good mother, here's metal more attractive.
¶Ophelia No, my lord.
¶Hamlet I mean, my head upon your lap.
¶Ophelia Ay, my lord.
1970Hamlet Do you think I meant country matters?
¶Ophelia I think nothing, my lord.
¶Hamlet That's a fair thought to lie between maids' legs.
¶Ophelia What is, my lord?
¶Hamlet Nothing.
1975Ophelia You are merry, my lord.
¶Hamlet Who, I?
¶Ophelia Ay, my lord.
¶Hamlet Oh, God, your only jig-maker. What should ¶a man do but be merry? For look you how 1980cheerfully my mother looks, and my father died within's two ¶hours.
¶Ophelia Nay, 'tis twice two months, my lord.
¶Hamlet So long? Nay, then, let the devil wear black, ¶for I'll have suit of sables. Oh, heavens! Die two 1985months ago, and not forgotten yet? Then there's hope a ¶great man's memory may outlive his life half a year. ¶But, by'r Lady, he must build churches then, or else shall he ¶suffer not thinking on, with the hobby-horse, whose ¶epitaph is, "For oh, for oh, the hobby-horse is forgot."
1990
Hautboys play. The dumb-show enters.
¶
Enter [Players as] a King and Queen very lovingly, the Queen ¶embracing him. She kneels and makes show of protestation unto He ¶him. takes her up, and declines his head upon her neck. ¶Lays him down upon a bank of flowers. She, seeing him 1995asleep, leaves him. Anon come in fellow, takes off his ¶crown, kisses it, pours poison in the King's ears, and ¶exits. The Queen returns, finds the King dead, and ¶makes passionate action. The poisoner, with some two or ¶three mutes, comes in again, seem to lament with her. 2000The dead body is carried away. The poisoner woos the ¶Queen with gifts. She seems loath and unwilling awhile, ¶but in the end accepts love. Exeunt [Players].
¶Ophelia What means this, my lord?
2010Ophelia Will they tell us what this show meant?
¶Hamlet Ay, or any show that you will show him. Be not ¶you ashamed to show, he'll not shame to tell you what it ¶means.
¶
Enter [a Player as] Prologue.
¶[Prologue] For us and for our tragedy,
¶Here stooping to your clemency,
¶We beg your hearing patiently.
[Exit.]
2020Hamlet Is this a prologue, or the posy of a ring?
¶Ophelia 'Tis brief, my lord.
¶Hamlet As woman's love.
¶
Enter [two Players as] King and his Queen.
¶Player King Full thirty times hath Phoebus' cart gone round
2025Neptune's salt wash and Tellus' orbèd ground,
¶And thirty dozen moons with borrowed sheen
¶About the world have times twelve thirties been
¶Since love our hearts and Hymen did our hands
¶Unite commutual in most sacred bands.
2030Player Queen So many journeys may the sun and moon
¶Make us again count o'er, ere love be done!
¶But woe is me, you are so sick of late,
¶So far from cheer and from your former state,
¶That I distrust you, Yet though I distrust,
2035Discomfort you, my lord, it nothing must.
¶For women's fear and love hold quantity;
¶In neither aught, or in extremity.
¶Now what my love is, proof hath made you know,
¶And as my love is sized, my fear is so.
2040Player King Faith, I must leave thee, love, and shortly too;
¶My operant powers my functions leave to do.
¶And thou shalt live in this fair world behind,
¶Honored, beloved; and haply one as kind
¶For husband shalt thou--
2045Player Queen Oh, confound the rest!
¶Such love must needs be treason in my breast.
¶In second husband let me be accurst!
¶None wed the second but who killed the first.
¶Hamlet Wormwood, wormwood.
2050Player Queen The instances that second marriage move
¶Are base respects of thrift, but none of love.
¶A second time I kill my husband dead
¶When second husband kisses me in bed.
¶Player King I do believe you think what now you speak,
2055But what we do determine, oft we break.
¶Purpose is but the slave to memory,
¶Of violent birth, but poor validity,
¶Which now the fruit unripe sticks on the tree,
¶But fall unshaken when they mellow be.
2060Most necessary 'tis that we forget
¶To pay ourselves what to ourselves is debt.
¶What to ourselves in passion we propose,
¶The passion ending, doth the purpose lose.
¶The violence of either grief or joy
2065Their own enactors with themselves destroy.
¶Where joy most revels, grief doth most lament;
¶Grief joys, joy grieves, on slender accident.
¶This world is not for aye, nor 'tis not strange
¶That even our loves should with our fortunes change;
2070For 'tis a question left us yet to prove
¶Whether love lead fortune, or else fortune love.
¶The great man down, you mark his favorite flies;
¶The poor advanced makes friends of enemies;
¶And hitherto doth love on fortune tend,
2075For who not needs shall never lack a friend,
¶And who in want a hollow friend doth try
¶Directly seasons him his enemy.
¶But orderly to end where I begun,
¶Our wills and fates do so contrary run
2080That our devices still are overthrown;
¶Our thoughts are ours, their ends none of our own.
¶So think thou wilt no second husband wed,
¶But die thy thoughts when thy first lord is dead.
¶Player Queen Nor earth to me give food, nor heaven light,
2085Sport and repose lock from me day and night,
¶Each opposite that blanks the face of joy
¶Meet what I would have well, and it destroy!
¶Both here and hence pursue me lasting strife,
¶If once a widow, ever I be wife!
2090Hamlet If she should break it now!
¶My spirits grow dull, and fain I would beguile
¶The tedious day with sleep.
2095Player Queen Sleep rock thy brain,
[The Player King] sleeps.
¶And never come mischance between us twain!
Exit [Player Queen].
¶Hamlet Madam, how like you this play?
¶Queen The lady doth protest too much, methinks.
¶Hamlet Oh, but she'll keep her word.
¶King What do you call the play?
2105Hamlet The Mousetrap. Marry, how? Tropically. ¶This play is the image of a murder done in Vienna. ¶Gonzago is the Duke's name, his wife Baptista. You shall see ¶anon. 'Tis a knavish piece of work, but what o' that ? ¶Your majesty and we that have free souls, it touches 2110us not. Let the galled jade winch, our withers are unwrung.
¶Ophelia You are a good chorus, my lord.
¶Ophelia You are keen, my lord, you are keen.
¶Ophelia Still better and worse.
¶Considerate season else no creature seeing,
¶Thou mixture rank, of midnight weeds collected,
¶With Hecate's ban thrice blasted, thrice invected,
¶Thy natural magic and dire property
2130On wholesome life usurps immediately.
¶
Pours the poison in his ears.
¶Hamlet He poisons him i'th' garden for his estate. His ¶name's Gonzago. The story is extant, and written in very choice ¶Italian. You shall see anon how the murderer gets the 2135love of Gonzago's wife.
¶Ophelia The King rises.
¶Hamlet What, frighted with false fire?
¶Queen How fares my lord?
¶Polonius Give o'er the play.
2140King Give me some light. Away!
¶All Lights, lights, lights!
Exeunt. ¶Hamlet and Horatio [remain].
¶Hamlet "Why, let the strucken deer go weep,
¶The heart ungallèd play,
¶Would not this, sir, and a forest of feathers--if the rest of ¶my fortunes turn Turk with me--with two provincial ¶roses on my razed shoes, get me a fellowship in a cry 2150of players, sir?
¶Horatio Half a share.
¶Hamlet A whole one, I.
¶For thou dost know, O Damon dear,
¶This realm dismantled was of Jove himself,
2155And now reigns here
¶A very, very pajock.
¶Horatio You might have rhymed.
2160Horatio Very well, my lord.
¶Hamlet Upon the talk of the poisoning?
¶Horatio I did very well note him.
¶
Enter Rosencrantz and Guildenstern.
¶Hamlet Oh, ha! Come, some music! Come, the recorders.
2165For if the King like not the comedy,
¶Why, then belike he likes it not, perdy.
¶Come, some music.
¶Guildenstern Good my lord, vouchsafe me a word with you.
¶Hamlet Sir a whole history.
2170Guildenstern The King, sir--
¶Hamlet Ay, sir, what of him?
¶Guildenstern Is in his retirement, marvelous distempered.
¶Hamlet With drink, sir?
¶Guildenstern No, my lord, rather with choler.
2175Hamlet Your wisdom should show itself more ¶richer to signify this to his doctor, for, for me to put him ¶to his purgation would perhaps plunge him into far ¶more choler.
¶Guildenstern Good my lord, put your discourse into some 2180frame, and stare not so wildly from my affair.
¶Hamlet I am tame sir. Pronounce.
¶Hamlet You are welcome.
2185Guildenstern Nay, good my lord, this courtesy is not of ¶the right breed. If it shall please you to make me a ¶wholesome answer, I will do your mother's commandment. ¶If not, your pardon and my return shall be the end of ¶my business.
2190Hamlet Sir, I cannot.
¶Rosencrantz What, my lord?
¶Hamlet Make you a wholesome answer; my wit's ¶diseased. But, sir, such answer as I can make, you shall ¶command, or rather, you say, my mother. Therefore no more, 2195but to the matter. My mother, you say.
¶Hamlet Oh, wonderful son, that can so astonish a ¶mother! But is there no sequel at the heels of this ¶mother's admiration?
Rosencrantz She desires to speak with you in her closet ¶ere you go to bed.
2205Rosencrantz My lord, you once did love me.
¶Hamlet So I do still, by these pickers and stealers.
¶Rosencrantz Good my lord, what is your cause of ¶distemper? You do surely bar the door of your own ¶liberty if you deny your griefs to your friend.
2210Hamlet Sir, I lack advancement.
¶Rosencrantz How can that be, when you have the voice of ¶the King himself for your succession in Denmark?
2215
Enter one with a recorder.
Oh, the recorder. Let me see. [He takes the recorder.] To withdraw with you, why¶do you go about to recover the wind of me, as if you ¶would drive me into a toil?
¶Guildenstern My lord, I cannot.
¶Hamlet I pray you.
2225Guildenstern Believe me, I cannot.
¶Hamlet I do beseech you.
¶Guildenstern I know no touch of it, my lord.
¶Hamlet 'Tis as easy as lying. Govern these ventages ¶with your finger and thumb, give it breath with your 2230mouth, and it will discourse most excellent music. ¶Look you, these are the stops.
¶Hamlet Why, look you now, how unworthy a thing 2235you make of me! You would play upon me, you would ¶seem to know my stops, you would pluck out the heart ¶of my mystery, you would sound me from my lowest ¶note to the top of my compass, and there is much ¶music, excellent voice in this little organ, yet cannot 2240you make it. Why, do you think that I am easier to be ¶played on than a pipe? Call me what instrument you will, ¶though you fret me, you cannot play upon me. [To Polonius, as he enters] God ¶bless you, sir.
¶
Enter Polonius.
¶Polonius By th' mass, and it's like a camel indeed.
2250Hamlet Methinks it is like a weasel.
¶Polonius It is backed like a weasel.
¶Hamlet Or like a whale?
¶Polonius Very like a whale.
¶Hamlet Then I will come to my mother by and by.
2255[Aside] They fool me to the top of my bent.
¶[Aloud] I will come by and by.
¶Polonius I will say so.
Exit. ¶"By and by" is easily said. Leave me, friends.
[Exeunt all but Hamlet.]
¶'Tis now the very witching time of night,
2260When churchyards yawn, and hell itself breaks out
¶Contagion to this world. Now could I drink hot blood,
¶And do such bitter business as the bitter day
¶Would quake to look on. Soft, now to my mother.
¶O heart, loose not thy nature! Let not ever
2265The soul of Nero enter this firm bosom.
¶Let me be cruel, not unnatural;
¶I will speak daggers to her, but use none.
¶My tongue and soul in this be hypocrites:
Exit.
