Internet Shakespeare Editions

Author: William Shakespeare
Editor: Matthew Steggle
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The Comedy of Errors (Folio 1, 1623)


The Comedie of Errors.
95

1255a rush, a haire, a drop of blood, a pin, a nut, a cherrie-
stone: but she more couetous, wold haue a chaine: Ma-
ster be wise, and if you giue it her, the diuell will shake
her Chaine, and fright vs with it.
Cur. I pray you sir my Ring, or else the Chaine,
1260I hope you do not meane to cheate me so?
Ant. Auant thou witch: Come Dromio let vs go.
S.Dro. Flie pride saies the Pea-cocke, Mistris that
you know.
Exit.
Cur. Now out of doubt Antipholus is mad,
1265Else would he neuer so demeane himselfe,
A Ring he hath of mine worth fortie Duckets,
And for the same he promis'd me a Chaine,
Both one and other he denies me now:
The reason that I gather he is mad,
1270Besides this present instance of his rage,
Is a mad tale he told to day at dinner,
Of his owne doores being shut against his entrance.
Belike his wife acquainted with his fits,
On purpose shut the doores against his way:
1275My way is now to hie home to his house,
And tell his wife, that being Lunaticke,
He rush'd into my house, and tooke perforce
My Ring away. This course I fittest choose,
For fortie Duckets is too much to loose.

1280
Enter Antipholus Ephes. with a Iailor.

An. Feare me not man, I will not breake away,
Ile giue thee ere I leaue thee so much money
To warrant thee as I am rested for.
My wife is in a wayward moode to day,
1285And will not lightly trust the Messenger,
That I should be attach'd in Ephesus,
I tell you 'twill sound harshly in her eares.

Enter Dromio Eph. with a ropes end.
Heere comes my Man, I thinke he brings the monie.
1290How now sir? Haue you that I sent you for?
E.Dro. Here's that I warrant you will pay them all.
Anti. But where's the Money?
E.Dro. Why sir, I gaue the Monie for the Rope.
Ant. Fiue hundred Duckets villaine for a rope?
1295E.Dro. Ile serue you sir fiue hundred at the rate.
Ant. To what end did I bid thee hie thee home?
E.Dro. To a ropes end sir, and to that end am I re-
turn'd.
Ant. And to that end sir, I will welcome you.
1300Offi. Good sir be patient.
E.Dro. Nay 'tis for me to be patient, I am in aduer-
sitie.
Offi. Good now hold thy tongue.
E.Dro. Nay, rather perswade him to hold his hands.
1305Anti. Thou whoreson senselesse Villaine.
E.Dro. I would I were senselesse sir, that I might
not feele your blowes.
Anti. Thou art sensible in nothing but blowes, and
so is an Asse.
1310E.Dro. I am an Asse indeede, you may prooue it by
my long eares. I haue serued him from the houre of my
Natiuitie to this instant, and haue nothing at his hands
for my seruice but blowes. When I am cold, he heates
me with beating: when I am warme, he cooles me with
1315beating: I am wak'd with it when I sleepe, rais'd with
it when I sit, driuen out of doores with it when I goe
from home, welcom'd home with it when I returne, nay

I beare it on my shoulders, as a begger woont her brat:
and I thinke when he hath lam'd me, I shall begge with
1320it from doore to doore.

Enter Adriana, Luciana, Courtizan, and a Schoole-
master, call'd Pinch.

Ant. Come goe along, my wife is comming yon-
der.
1325E.Dro. Mistris respice finem, respect your end, or ra-
ther the prophesie like the Parrat, beware the ropes end.
Anti. Wilt thou still talke?
Beats Dro.
Curt. How say you now? Is not your husband mad?
Adri. His inciuility confirmes no lesse:
1330Good Doctor Pinch, you are a Coniurer,
Establish him in his true sence againe,
And I will please you what you will demand.
Luc. Alas how fiery, and how sharpe he lookes.
Cur. Marke, how he trembles in his extasie.
1335Pinch. Giue me your hand, and let mee feele your
pulse.
Ant. There is my hand, and let it feele your eare.
Pinch. I charge thee Sathan, hous'd within this man,
To yeeld possession to my holie praiers,
1340And to thy state of darknesse hie thee straight,
I coniure thee by all the Saints in heauen.
Anti. Peace doting wizard, peace; I am not mad.
Adr. Oh that thou wer't not, poore distressed soule.
Anti. You Minion you, are these your Customers?
1345Did this Companion with the saffron face
Reuell and feast it at my house to day,
Whil'st vpon me the guiltie doores were shut,
And I denied to enter in my house.
Adr. O husband, God doth know you din'd at home
1350Where would you had remain'd vntill this time,
Free from these slanders, and this open shame.
Anti. Din'd at home? Thou Villaine, what sayest
thou?
Dro. Sir sooth to say, you did not dine at home.
1355Ant. Were not my doores lockt vp, and I shut out?
Dro. Perdie, your doores were lockt, and you shut
out.
Anti. And did not she her selfe reuile me there?
Dro. Sans Fable, she her selfe reuil'd you there.
1360Anti. Did not her Kitchen maide raile, taunt, and
scorne me?
Dro. Certis she did, the kitchin vestall scorn'd you.
Ant. And did not I in rage depart from thence?
Dro. In veritie you did, my bones beares witnesse,
1365That since haue felt the vigor of his rage.
Adr. Is't good to sooth him in these crontraries?
Pinch. It is no shame, the fellow finds his vaine,
And yeelding to him, humors well his frensie.
Ant. Thou hast subborn'd the Goldsmith to arrest
1370mee.
Adr. Alas, I sent you Monie to redeeme you,
By Dromio heere, who came in hast for it.
Dro. Monie by me? Heart and good will you might,
But surely Master not a ragge of Monie.
1375Ant. Wentst not thou to her for a purse of Duckets.
Adri. He came to me, and I deliuer'd it.
Luci. And I am witnesse with her that she did:
Dro. God and the Rope-maker beare me witnesse,
That I was sent for nothing but a rope.
1380Pinch. Mistris, both Man and Master is possest,
I know it by their pale and deadly lookes,
They