¶Enter Iustice Shallow, and Iustice
¶Shallow Come on, come on, come on
sir, giue me your
1535hand
sir, giue me your hand
sir, an early
stirrer, by the Roode:
¶and how dooth my good co
sin Silens?
¶Silence Good morrow good co
sin Shallow.
¶Shallow And how dooth my coo
sin your bed-fellowe?
¶and your fayre
st daughter and mine, my god-daughter El-
¶Silens Alas, a blacke woo
sel, co
sin Shallow.
¶Shallow By yea, and no
sir: I dare
saye my coo
sin Wil-
¶liam is become a good
scholler, he is at Oxford
still, is hee
1545Silens Indeede
sir to my co
st.
¶Shallow A mu
st then to the Innes a court
shortly: I was
¶once of Clements Inne, where I thinke they will talke of mad
¶Silens You were cald Lu
sty Shallow then, co
sin.
1550Shallow By the ma
sse I was cald any thing, and I would
¶haue done any thing indeed too, and roundly too: there was
¶I, and little Iohn Doyt of Stafford-
shire, and Blacke George
Barnes, and Francis Picke-bone, and Will Squele a Cotsole
¶man, you had not foure
such
swinge-bucklers in al the Innes
1555a court againe: and I may
say to you, we knew where the bona
¶robes were, and had the be
st of them all at commaundement:
¶then was Iacke Fal
staffe (now
sir Iohn) a boy, and Page to
¶Thomas Mowbray duke of Norffolke.
1560Silens Coo
sin, this
sir Iohn that comes hither anone about
¶Shall. The
same (
sir Iohn) the very
same, I
see him breake
¶Skoggins head at the Court gate, when a was a Cracke, not
¶thus high: and the very
same day did I fight with one Sam
son
1565Stockefi
sh a Fruiterer behinde Greyes Inne: Ie
su, Ie
su, the
¶mad dayes that I haue
spent! and to
see how many of my olde
¶Silens We
shall all follow, coo
sin.
¶Shal. Certaine, tis certaine, very
sure, very
sure, death (as the
1570P
salmi
st
saith) is certaine to all, all
shall die. How a good yoke
¶of bullockes at Samforth faire?
¶Silens By my troth I was not there.
¶Shal. Death is certaine: Is olde Dooble of your towne li-
¶Shal. Ie
su, Ie
su, dead! a drew a good bow, and dead? a
shot
¶a fine
shoote: Iohn a Gaunt loued him well, and betted much
¶money on his head. Dead! a would haue clapt ith clowt at
¶twelue
score, and caried you a forehand
shaft a foureteene and
1580foureteene and a halfe, that it would haue doone a mans heart
¶good to
see. How a
score of Ewes now?
¶Silens Thereafter as they be, a
score of good Ewes may be
1585Shal. And is olde Dooble dead?
¶Silens Heere come twoo of
sir Iohn Fal
staffes men, as I
¶Enter Bardolfe, and one with him.
¶Good morrow hone
st gentlemen.
1590Bard. I be
seech you, which is Iu
stice Shallow?
¶Shall. I am Robert Shallow
sir, a poore E
squire of this
¶Countie, and one of the Kings Iu
stices of the Peace: what is
¶Bard. My Captaine,
sir, commends him to you, my Cap-
1595taine
sir Iohn Fal
staffe, a tall gentleman, by heauen, and a mo
st
¶Shall. He greets me wel,
sir, I knew him a good back
sword
¶man: how doth the good knight? may I a
ske how my Ladie
1600Bar. Sir, pardon, a
souldiour is better accommodate than
¶Shallow It is well
sayde in faith
sir, and it is well
sayde in-
deede too, better accommodated, it is good, yea in deede is
¶it, good phra
ses, are
surely, and euer were, very commenda-
1605ble, accommodated: it comes of
accommodo, very good, a
¶Bardolfe Pardon me
sir, I haue heard the worde, phra
se
¶call you it? by this good day, I knowe not the phra
se, but
¶I will mayntayne the worde with my
sworde, to bee a
soul-
1610diour-like word, and a worde of exceeding good command,
¶by heauen: accommodated, that is, when a man is, as they
¶say, accommodated, or when a man is, beeing whereby, a
¶may be thought to be accommodated, which is an excellent
1615Enter sir Iohn Falstaffe.
¶Iust. It is very iu
st: looke, here comes good
sir Iohn, giue
¶me your good hand, giue mee your wor
shippes good hand,
¶by my troth you like well, and beare your yeeres very well,
1620Fal. I am glad to
see you well, good mai
ster Robert Shal-
¶low, mai
ster Soccard (as I thinke.)
¶Shal. No
sir Iohn, it is my coo
sin Silens, in commi
ssion with
¶Falst. Good mai
ster Silens, it well befits you
should be of
¶Silens Your good wor
ship is welcome.
¶Falst. Fie, this is hot weather (gentlemen) haue you proui-
¶ded me heere halfe a dozen
sufficient men?
¶Shal. Mary haue we
sir, will you
sit?
1630Falst. Let me
see them I be
seech you.
¶Shall. Wheres the rowle? wheres the rowle? wheres the
¶rowle? let me
see, let me
see,
so,
so,
so,
so,
so (
so,
so) yea mary
sir,
¶Rafe Mouldy, let them appeere as I call, let them do
so, let thē
¶do
so, let me
see, where is Mouldy?
¶Mouldy Here and it plea
se you.
¶Sha. What think you
sir Iohn, a good limbd fellow, yong,
¶strong, and of good friends.
¶Fal. Is thy name Mouldie?
1640Moul. Yea, and't plea
se you.
¶Fal. Tis the more time thou wert v
sde.
¶Shal. Ha, ha, ha, mo
st excellent yfaith, things that are moul-
¶dy lacke v
se: very
singular good, infaith well
said
sir Iohn, very
¶Moul. I was prickt wel enough before, and you could haue
¶let me alone, my old dame will be vndone now for one to doe
¶her hu
sbandrie, and her drudgery, you need not to haue prickt
¶me, there are other men fitter to go out then I.
¶Fal. Go to, peace Mouldy, you
shall go, Mouldy it is time
¶Shal. Peace fellow, peace,
stand a
side, know you where you
1655are? for th'other
sir Iohn: let me
see Simon Shadow.
¶Fal. Yea mary, let me haue him to
sit vnder, hees like to be
¶Fal. Shadow, who
se
sonne art thou?
¶Shad. My mothers
sonne
sir.
¶Fal. Thy mothers
sonne! like enough, and thy fathers
sha-
¶dow,
so the
sonne of the female is the
shadow of the male: it is
1665often
so indeede, but much of the fathers
sub
stance.
¶Shal. Do you like him
sir Iohn?
¶Fal. Shadow wil
serue for
summer, pricke him, for we haue
¶a number of
shadowes fill vp the mu
ster booke.
¶Fal. Thou art a very ragged wart.
¶Shal. Shall I pricke him
sir Iohn?
¶Fal. It were
superfluous, for apparell is built vpon his back,
1680and the whole frame
stands vpon pins, pricke him no more.
¶Shal. Ha, ha, ha, you can do it
sir, you can do it, I commend
¶you well: Francis Feeble.
¶Shal. What trade art thou Feeble?
¶Feeble A womans tailer
sir.
¶Shal. Shall I pricke him
sir?
¶Fal. You may, but if he had bin a mans tailer hee'd a prickt
¶you: wilt thou make as manie holes in an enemies battaile, as
¶thou ha
st done in a womans peticoate.
¶Feeble I will do my good will
sir, you can haue no more.
1695Fal. Well
saide good womans tailer, well
saide couragious
¶Feeble, thou wilt be as valiant as the wrathfull doue, or mo
st
¶magnanimous mou
se, pricke the womans tailer: wel M. Shal-
1700Feeble I would Wart might haue gone
sir.
¶Fal. I would thou wert a mans tailer, that thou might
st
¶mend him and make him fit to goe, I cannot put him to a pri-
¶uate
souldier, that is the leader of
so many thou
sands, let that
¶suffice mo
st forcible Feeble.
1705Feeble It
shall
suffice
sir.
¶Fal. I am bound to thee reuerend Feeble, who is next?
¶Shal. Peter Bul-calfe o'th greene.
¶Fal. Yea mary, lets
see Bul-calfe.
¶Fal. Fore God a likely fellow, come pricke Bul-calfe til hee
¶Bul. O Lord, good my lord captaine.
¶Falst. What, do
st thou roare before thou art prickt?
1715Bul. O Lord
sir, I am a di
sea
sed man.
¶Fal. What di
sea
se ha
st thou?
¶Bul. A hor
son cold
sir, a cough
sir, which I cought with
¶ringing in the Kings affaires vpon his coronation day
sir.
1720Fal. Come, thou
shalt go to the warres in a gowne, we wil
¶haue away thy cold, and I wil take
such order that thy friendes
¶shal ring for thee. Is here all?
¶Shal. Here is two more cald then your number, you mu
st
¶haue but foure here
sir, and
so I pray you goe in with mee to
¶Fa. Come, I wil go drink with you, but I cānot tary dinner:
¶I am glad to
see you, by my troth ma
ster Shallow.
¶Shal. O
sir Iohn, do you remember
since we lay all night
1730in the windmil in
saint Georges field?
¶Fal. No more of that ma
ster Shallow.
¶Shal. Ha, twas a merry night, and is Iane Night-worke a-
1735Falst. She liues ma
ster Shallow.
¶Shal. She neuer could away with me.
¶Fa. Neuer neuer,
she wold alwaies
say,
she could not abide
¶Sha. By the ma
sse I conld anger her too'th heart,
she was
1740then a
bona roba, doth
she hold her owne wel?
¶Fal. Old old ma
ster Shallow.
¶Shal. Nay
she mu
st be old,
she cannot chu
se but be old, cer-
¶tain
shees old, & had Robin Night-work by old Night-work,
¶before I came to Clements inne.
1745Scilens Thats fiftie fiue yeare ago.
¶Shal. Ha cou
sen Scilens that thou had
st
seene that that this
¶Knight and I haue
seene, ha
sir Iohn,
said I wel?
¶Fal. We haue heard the chimes at midnight M. Shallow.
¶Sha. That we haue, that we haue, that we haue, in faith
sir
¶Iohn we haue, our watch-worde was Hemboies, come lets to
¶dinner, come lets to dinner, Ie
sus the daies that wee haue
seene,
1755Bul. Good mai
ster corporate Bardolfe,
stand my friend,
¶& heres foure Harry ten
shillings in french crowns for you, in
¶very truth
sir, I had as liue be hangd
sir as go, and yet for mine
¶owne part
sir I do not care, but rather becau
se I am vnwilling,
¶and for mine owne part haue a de
sire to
stay with my friends,
1760el
se
sir I did not care for mine owne part
so much.
¶Bard. Go to,
stand a
side.
¶Moul. And good M. corporall captaine, for my old dames
¶sake
stand my friend,
she has no body to doe any thing about
1765her when I am gone, and
she is old and cannot helpe her
selfe,
¶you
shall haue forty
sir.
¶Bar. Go to,
stand a
side.
¶Feeble By my troth I care not, a man can die but once, we
¶owe God a death, ile nere beare a ba
se mind, and't bee my
1770de
stny:
so, and't be not,
so, no man's too good to
serue's prince,
¶and let it go which way it will, he that dies this yeere is quit for
¶Bar Well
said, th'art a good fellow.
¶Feeble Faith ile beare no ba
se mind.
1774.1Enter Falstaffe and the Iustices.
1775Fal. Come
sir, which men
shall I haue?
¶Shal. Foure of which you plea
se.
¶Bar. Sir, a word with you, I haue three pound to free Moul-
1780Shal. Come
sir Iohn, which foure wil you haue?
¶Fal. Do you chu
se for me.
¶Shal. Mary then, Mouldy, Bulcalfe, Feeble, and Sadow.
¶Fal. Mouldy and Bulcalfe, for you Mouldy
stay at home, til
1785you are pa
st
seruice: and for your part Bulcalfe, grow til you
¶come vnto it, I will none of you.
¶Shal. Sir Iohn,
sir Iohn, doe not your
selfe wrong, they are
¶your likelie
st men, and I would haue you
serude with the
1790Fal. Wil you tel me (ma
ster Shallow) how to chu
se a man?
¶care I for the limbe, the thewes, the
stature, bulke and big a
s-
¶semblance of a man: giue me the
spirit M. Shalow: heres Wart,
¶you
see what a ragged apparance it is, a
shall charge you, and
1795di
scharge you with the motion of a pewterers hammer, come
¶off and on
swifter then he that gibbets on the brewers bucket:
¶and this
same halfe facde fellow Shadow, giue me this man, he
¶pre
sents no marke to the enemy, the fo-man may with as great
¶aime leuel at the edge of a pen-knife, and for a retraite how
1800swiftly wil this Feeble the womans Tailer runne off? O giue
¶mee the
spare men, and
spare me the great ones, putte mee a
¶caliuer into Warts hand Bardolfe.
¶Bar. Hold Wart, trauers thas, thas, thas.
1805Fal. Come mannage me your caliuer:
so, very wel, go to, very
¶good, exceeding good, O giue me alwaies a little leane, olde
¶chopt Ballde,
shot: well
said yfaith Wart, th'art a good
scab,
¶hold, theres a te
ster for thee.
¶Shal. He is not his crafts-ma
ster, he doth not do it right; I
1810remember at Mile-end-greene, when I lay at Clements Inne,
¶I was then
sir Dagonet in Arthurs
show, there was a little
¶quiuer fellow, and a would mannage you his peece thus, and a
¶would about and about, and come you in, and come you in,
1815rah, tah, tah, would a
say, bounce would a
say, and away again
¶would a go, and againe would a come: I
shall nere
see
such a
¶Fal. The
se fellowes wooll doe well M. Shallow, God keep
¶you M. Scilens, I will not v
se many words with you, fare you
1820wel gentlemen both, I thank you, I mu
st a do
sen mile to night:
¶Bardolfe, giue the
souldiers coates.
¶Shal. Sir Iohn, the Lord ble
sse you, God pro
sper your af-
¶faires, God
send vs peace at your returne, vi
sit our hou
se, let
1825our old acquaintance be renewed, peraduenture I will with ye
¶Fal. Fore God would you would.
¶Shal. Go to, I haue
spoke at a word, God keep you.
1830Fal. Fare you well gentle gentlemen.
exit
Shal. On Bardolfe, leade the men away, as I returne I will
¶fetch off the
se iu
stices, I do
see the bottome of iu
stice Shallow,
¶Lord, Lord, how
subiect we old men are to this vice of lying,
¶this
same
staru'd iu
stice hath done nothing but prate to me,
1835of the wildne
sse of his youth, and the feates he hath done a-
¶bout Turne-bull
street, and euery third word a lie, dewer paid
¶to the hearer then the Turkes tribute, I doe remember him
¶at Clements Inne, like a man made after
supper of a chee
se pa-
¶ring, when a was naked, he was for all the worlde like a forkt
¶reddi
sh, with a head fanta
stically carued vpon it with a knife,
¶a was
so forlorne, that his demen
sions to any thicke
sight were
¶inuincible, a was the very genius of famine, yet lecherous as a
1843.1monkie, & the whores cald him mandrake, a came ouer in the
¶rereward of the fa
shion, and
sung tho
se tunes to the ouer-
1844.1schutcht hu
swiues, that he heard the Car-men whi
stle, and
¶sware they were his fancies or his good-nights, and nowe is
1845this vices dagger become a
squire, and talkes as familiarly of
¶Iohn a Gaunt, as if he had bin
sworne brother to him, and
¶ile be
sworn a nere
saw him but once in the tylt-yard, and then
¶he bur
st his head for crowding among the Mar
shalles men, I
1850saw it and told Iohn a Gaunt he beate his owne name, for you
¶might haue thru
st him and all his aparell into an eele-
skin, the
¶ca
se of a treble hoboy was a man
sion for him a Court, and
¶now has he land and beefes. Well, ile be acquainted with him
1855if I returne, and t'
shal go hard, but ile make him a philo
sophers
¶two
stones to me, if the yong Da
se be a baite for the old Pike,
¶I
see no rea
son in the law of nature but I may
snap at him, till
¶Time
shape, and there an end.