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Henry IV, Part 2 (Quarto 1, 1598).

Author: William Shakespeare
Not Peer Reviewed
790
Enter the Prince, Poynes, sir Iohn Russel, with other.
Prince Before God, I am exceeding weary.
Poynes Ist come to that? I had thought wearines durst not
haue attacht one of so hie bloud.
795Prince Faith it does me, though it discolors the complexi-
on of my greatnes to acknowledge it: doth it not shew vildly
in me, to desire small beere?
Poynes Why a Prince should not be so loosely studied, as
to remember so weake a composition.
800Prince Belike then my appetite was not princely gote, for
by my troth, I do now remember the poor creature smal beere.
But indeed these humble considerations make me out of loue
with my greatnesse. What a disgrace is it to mee to remember
thy name? or to know thy face to morow? or to take note how
805many paire of silke stockings thou hast with these, and those
that were thy peach colourd once, or to beare the inuentorie of
thy shirts, as one for superfluitie, and another for vse. But that
the Tennis court keeper knows better than I, for it is a low eb
810of linnen with thee when thou keepest not racket there, as thou
hast not done a great while, because the rest of the low Coun-
tries haue eate vp thy holland: and God knows whether those
812.1that bal out the ruines of thy linnen shal inherite his kingdom:
but the Midwiues say, the children are not in the fault where-
vpon the world increases, and kinreds are mightily strengthe-
ned.
Poynes How ill it followes, after you haue labored so hard,
815you should talke so ydlely! tell me how many good yong prin-
ces woulde doe so, their fathers being so sicke, as yours at this
816.1time is.
Prince Shall I tel thee one thing Poynes?
Poynes Yes faith, and let it be an excellent good thing.
820Prince It shall serue among wittes of no higher breeding
then thine.
Poynes Go to, I stand the push of your one thing that you
will tell.
Prince Mary I tell thee it is not meete that I should bee sad
825now my father is sicke, albeit I could tell to thee, as to one it
pleases me for fault of a better to call my friend, I could be sad,
and sad indeede too.
Poynes Very hardly, vpon such a subiect.
Prince By this hand, thou thinkest me as farre in the diuels
830booke, as thou and Falstaffe, for obduracie and persistancie,
let the end trie the man, but I tel thee, my heart bleeds inward-
ly that my father is so sick, and keeping such vile company as
thou arte, hath in reason taken from me all ostentation of sor-
rowe.
835Poynes The reason.
Prince What wouldst thou thinke of me if I should weep?
Poynes I woulde thincke thee a most princely hypocrite.
Prince It would bee euery mans thought, and thou arte
a blessed felow, to thinke as euery man thinkes, neuer a mans
840thought in the world, keepes the rode way better then thine,
euerie man would thinke me an hypocrite indeede, and what
accites your most worshipfull thought to thinke so?
Poynes Why because you haue been so lewd and so much
845engraffed to Falstaffe.
Prince And to thee.
Poynes By this light I am well spoke on, I can heare it with
mine owne eares, the worst that they can say of me is that I am
a second brother, and that I am a proper fellow of my hands,
850and those two things I confesse I cannot helpe: by the masse
here comes Bardolfe.
851.1
Enter Bardolfe and boy.
Prince And the boy that I gaue Falstaffe, a had him from
me Christian, and looke if the fat villaine haue not transformd
him Ape.
Bard. God saue your grace.
Prince And yours most noble Bardolfe.
Poynes Come you vertuous asse, you bashfull foole, must
you be blushing, wherefore blush you now? what a maidenly
860man at armes are you become? ist such a matter to get a pottle-
pots maidenhead?
Boy A calls me enow my Lord, through a red lattice, and I
could discerne no part of his face from the window, at last I
spied his eies, and me thought he had made two holes in the ale
865wiues peticote and so peept through.
Prince Has not the boy profited?
Bard. Away you horson vpright rabble, away.
Boy Away you rascally Altheas dreame, away.
870Prince Instruct vs boy, what dreame boy?
Boy Mary my lord, Althear dreampt she was deliuered of
a firebrand, and therefore I call him her dreame.
Prince A crownes worth of good interpretation there tis boy.
875Poines O that this blossome could be kept from cankers!
well, there is sixpence to preserue thee.
Bard. And you do not make him hangd among you, the gal-
lowes shall haue wrong.
Prince And how doth thy master Bardolfe?
880Bard. Well my Lord, he heard of your graces comming to
towne, theres a letter for you.
Poynes Deliuerd with good respect, and how doth the mar-
tlemasse your master?
Bard. In bodily health sir.
885Poynes Mary the immortall part needes a phisitian, but that
moues not him, though that be sicke, it dies not.
Prince I do allow this Wen to be as familiar with me, as my
dogge, and he holds his place, for looke you how he writes.
Poynes Iohn Falstaffe Knight, euery man must know that
as oft as he has occasion to name himselfe: euen like those that
are kin to the King for they neuer pricke their finger, but they
saye, theres some of the Kings bloud spilt: how comes that
895(saies he) that takes vppon him not to conceiue the answer is as
ready as a borowed cap: I am the Kings poore cosin, sir.
Prince Nay they will be kin to vs, or they will fetch it from
Iaphet, but the letter, Sir Iohn Falstaffe knight, to the sonne of
900the king, nearest his father, Harry prince of Wales, greeting.
Poynes Why this is a certificate.
Prince Peace.
I will imitate the honourable Romanes in breuitie.
905Poynes He sure meanes breuity in breath, short winded,
I commend mee to thee, I commend thee, and, I leaue
thee, be not too familiar with Poynes, for he misuses thy fa-
uours so much, that he sweares thou art to mary his sister Nel,
repent at idle times as thou maist, and so farwel.
910
Thine by yea, and no, which is as much as to say, as
thou vsest him, Iacke Falstaffe with my family,
Iohn with my brothers and sisters, and sir Iohn
with all Europe.
Poynes My Lord, Ile steep this letter in sacke and make him
915eate it.
Prince Thats to make him eate twenty of his words, but do
you vse me, thus Ned? must I marrie your sister?
Poynes God send the wench no worse fortune, but I neuer
said so.
920Prince Wel, thus we play the fooles with the time, and the
spirits of the wise sit in the clowdes and mocke vs, is your ma-
ster here in London?
Bard. Yea my Lord.
Prince Where sups he? doth the old boare feede in the old
925Franke?
Bard. At the old place, my lord, in Eastcheape.
Prince VVhat companie?
Boy Ephesians, my lord, of the old church.
Prince Sup any women with him?
930Boy None my lord, but old mistris Quickly, and mistris Dol
Tere-sheet.
Prince VVhat Pagan may that be?
Boy A proper gentlewoman sir, and a kinswoman of my
masters.
935Prince Euen such kinne as the parish Heicfors are to the
towne bull, shall we steale vpon them Ned at supper?
Poynes I am your shadow my Lord, ile follow you.
Prince Sirra, you boy and Bardolfe, no worde to your ma-
ster that I am yet come to towne; theres for your silence.
Bar. I haue no tongue sir.
Boy And for mine sir, I will gouerne it.
Prince Fare you well: go, this Doll Tere-sheete should be
945some rode.
Poyns I warrant you, as common as the way between S. Al-
bons and London.
Prince How might we see Falstaffe bestow himself to night
in his true colours, and not our selues be seene?
950Poynes Put on two letherne ierkins and aprons, and waite
vpon him at his table as drawers.
Prince From a god to a bul, a heauy descension, it was Ioues
case, from a pince to a prentise, a low transformation, that shal
be mine, for in enery thing the purpose must weigh with the
955folly, follow me Ned.
exeunt.